In Memoriam
by ToxicatedRose
Summary: When teenaged Oscar flies into the U.S.A in the hopes of reconnecting with his workaholic sister and distant father, he gets more than he bargained for. As the world collapses into chaos, Oscar meets other survivors. Over the next six months, they will make difficult decisions and suffer drastic consequences - but who will live?
1. Descent

_Thou wilt not leave us in the dust:_

 _Thou madest man, he knows not why,_

 _He thinks he was not made to die;_

 _And thou hast made him: thou art just._

* * *

"Oscar," Selene hissed, shoving him awake. "Will you please stop it?"

Oscar jolted out of his sleep. He'd been distant from his sister all day, ever since they'd left the airport together. And obviously no matter what he did he wouldn't leave Selene satisfied on the journey. On the airport she'd scolded him for being rude to the service staff and for drinking (even though he was of age in his home country, the UK). For the first five hours of the flight he'd apparently been disrespectful to the flight staff, and he couldn't even sleep without doing something wrong.

"Approaching New York State," the voice at the intercom announced. Oscar couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something unsettling about the surrounding passengers.

"What now?" He grumbled as alertness came back to his system. He turned to his sister.

"You were kicking," Selene said, investigating her face in the mirror. Selene had always been obsessively tidy. She was the textbook definition of a perfectionist. Make-up done perfectly, hair done perfectly and even though she hadn't graduated from college she liked to give herself a professional façade by wearing fresh suits. She adjusted her hair and straightened her skirt for the umpteenth time before she finally turned to Oscar. "We're descending soon."

Oscar turned towards the window sulkily.

"Yay," he said sarcastically, not expecting his sister to catch on. She did.

Her voice turned gentle for once, instead of adopting the sternness he was so used to hearing in his mother's voice. "Look, Oscar, is everything okay? I know I haven't been the best sister lately, being in another country and being so busy with college, but I'm here to talk," he didn't reply. "Mum's been telling dad and I about you. She found pot in your room; your teachers have been saying that you're a disruption in class. You weren't always like this."

Oscar saw his grey eyes roll in the reflection of the window, almost camouflaged by the surrounding blue sky.

"What does it matter?" He turned to her. "I doubt mum cares very much anyway."

"You know she does," Selene's well-manicured hand rested on Oscar's shoulder, her pink lips pulling themselves into a smile. "It's not been easy for any of us."

"The divorce was a decade ago," Oscar said emptily. He couldn't pretend it didn't still affect him.

"I don't mean that, that's in the past," Selene leant back, ignoring the intercom's announcement of the plane's descent. Oscar was wide-awake now and he understood why he found that there was something up with the plane. The air hosts and hostesses were bustling around, giving each other sharp whispers and looking kind of anxious. Oscar hoped it wasn't anything too bad, though he couldn't be quite sure himself. Selene was a high achiever, and was much smarter than Oscar could hope to be, but after being pampered in the comfy lifestyle of any Ivy League attendee she didn't know real life – not like Oscar did. He knew that there was something up, something being kept from the passengers.

It was probably nothing. Maybe one of the meals was gone, or maybe they'll be delayed. If there were going to be some fatal crash or something Oscar would expect them to be much more panicked.

"You're distant again," Selene chided. Oscar glanced at her dark eyes and raven black hair.

"Sorry," Oscar mumbled.

"Just with dad finally getting married and having children of his own, moving to the U.S.A, me moving there to for college, it must be pretty lonely when you're alone with mum in Exeter," Selene was obviously trying to get him to dish out his feelings. Oscar only shrugged, failing to be responsive. "You haven't met Lily, have you?" Selene opened her phone and showed Oscar a picture of a chubby, brown haired beauty that was riding some kind of kid's bike. "She's four now, and Kristy is expecting a new kid!"

"Go them," Oscar frowned. "I'm not part of their family."

Selene winced when the feeling of the descent finally hit her ears; another announcement was made from the pilot over the intercom. The air hosts and hostesses seemed a little calmer.

"Of course you're part of the family," she said, sticking her finger in her ears and leaning back. "Don't say I didn't try, Oscar. I don't know why you even agreed to come visit dad, you refused to talk to him for what, five years? If you're still mad at him maybe you should have stayed away."

As the plane got closer to the ground Oscar could see fields, roads and buildings beneath the plane. Most of the people on the plane would be happy to land: they'd go on a holiday, or would see family members they'd missed. Oscar could only feel a bad gut feeling, like a doom and gloom gut feeling.

"You didn't try," Oscar turned to his sister, saying how he felt for the first time in years. She looked at him neutrally. "You just moved on, and when you were old enough you ran away just like dad. Maybe you can play happy families, but I can't."

Selene paused, lost for words as Oscar turned to look out of the window again. He thought he saw her about to speak from his peripheral vision, but the bump of the plane landing silenced her. The intercom was surprisingly silent, considering they'd just landed, and Oscar and Selene were both confused as passengers were prevented from standing by air stewards. There was something definitely up.

Oscar glanced out of the window to try and get a glimpse of Buffalo-Niagra international airport. He could see the modern, glass building in the distance, but it was surprisingly empty. There were no planes on runways or near the surrounding skies, though there were a lot of planes that were resting. He tried to find a glimpse of people – of anyone – close by.

What had happened in a matter of eight hours? When he left Exeter England wasn't so bad. There'd be rioting in London and in other big cities, but that was usually expected, right? It was like people had vanished.

Maybe something had happened in America. He turned to Selene who looked equally panicked. Had she looked out of the window? All passengers on board were extremely restless.

"What's up?" He asked, feeling weird for being the one asking that question for once.

"My phone… There's no signal," Selene explained, desperately trying to text. She stood up slightly, trying to observe all the other passengers before a camp air steward walked over to her and politely demanded she sit down.

"We're just facing some problems currently, Ma'am," he told her.

"What problems?" Oscar asked, glancing out of the window again. He thought he could see a highway, but that was eerily empty. Maybe he was just overanalysing things.

When he turned to the air steward, he looked kind of uncomfortable, like he was going to admit an inconvenient truth.

"For the past five or so hours we've failed to initiate contact with anybody," he admitted, clearing his throat. "We've arrived and there's still no-one to contact. We tried to contact so many government officials but many weren't contactable, and those who we did contact were incredibly vague and told us to get to our destination and radio them there." Selene suddenly went pale. "But there's nobody here."

* * *

 **I guess this is the introduction.**

 **For all SYOC newbies who are in TWD fandom but not THG fandom, this is an SYOC. I have a form on my profile, which you fill in and send me. Basically, you'll be sending your characters into this storyline to interact with my OC's. Does that kind of make sense?**

 **Submission deadlines will be… the 12th of July! Not because of America, because it isn't America day.**

 **I have a fair few characters now and hopefully this will shape up to be a great story. It will be gory, sweary, adulty and kind of sexy too, as a warning. Also: updates will probably be every two weeks. This story will be between 30-40 chapters, maybe a little bit less, but no more :)**

 **P.S - What does everyone think about a forum for this story? I'm usually tentative to follow the SYOC popular trends, but a forum is a bandwagon I'm interested on jumping on.**

 **P.P.S - The story is named after the Tennyson poem 'In Memoriam', a favourite of mine. Each chapter will have a single stanza from the veryyyy long poem that will coincide with the storyline :)**


	2. Chase

_Day 1 of the_ _apocalypse_

* * *

 **This is just a warning: the Americans in this story (probably the vast majority of characters) are going to be using US English, and the two British characters UK English. That should be pretty self-explanatory but just in case it confuses people, yeah.**

 **Also, Americans, correct me if an American uses a British-ism. I know it's a beautiful language, but no.**

* * *

 _Forgive these wild and wandering cries,_

 _Confusions of a wasted youth;_

 _Forgive them where they fail in truth,_

 _And in thy wisdom make me wise._

* * *

The plane erupted into chaos. A lot of passengers became aggressive, demanding that they fight their way out of the plane. Oscar saw a lot of the Americans try to phone relatives, their hands all trembling in union. Maybe they were being dramatic; something bad might have happened, but it couldn't have been the end of the world. He and Selene occasionally exchanged small, worried glances. Even she seemed scared.

It was a nice distraction from family drama, Oscar guessed. Still, careful what you wish for.

"Sit down!" a female voice demanded. Oscar looked up to see a well-dressed female flight attendant holding a microphone for all to hear. Everybody collectively went silent after hearing her commanding voice. Oscar picked up his rucksack, putting it on his knee and almost huddling it close for support. "As you know, we've had a minor problem."

"Minor problem, lady?" An angry, overweight man stood up and shouted at her, intimidating his daughter who curled up on the seat next to him. "We come back to an empty fucking airport! I demand a fucking refund!"

Some people mumbled in agreement.

"Naturally, all things will be sorted out," the airhostess told him, losing her confidence. "The pilot is discussing things with US government officials. We will go into the terminal and follow their instructions. Just keep seated until further instruction and everything will be fine, I assure you that in a couple of hours you'll be back with your families." She smiled lightly. "If you need me, just ask for Wendy."

She disappeared into the cockpit again.

"What do you think is happening?" Selene said with a strained voice. "I'm trying to contact dad and I'm having no luck. There's just no signal."

"It'll be okay," Oscar said, not convinced he was right. He glanced out of the window again to look at the empty view outside. It was as if life had ceased to exist, though if the pilot was talking to U.S governmental officials there had to be someone out there. He wasn't too worried about his dad, but he hoped his mother was okay back at home. He'd try to call her as soon as possible.

They must have sat there in ten minutes. The discussion within the plane was available for all to hear. There had been a lot of reports circulating about disease, riots, observed pattern of strange behaviour, and of course there were your run of the mill conspiracy theories. Oscar and Selene barely exchanged a word, and were fortunate if they so much as looked at each other.

One of the air stewards reached the front of the plane. He glanced at the crowd of restless people all situated around the plane, obviously knowing that they weren't prepared for what they were going to hear.

"There's been a problem," he sounded mortified. Usually in all situations these people had to be calm – it was their job. But this flight steward wasn't. He was shaking and pale. "As you all know by this point we've had problems initiating contact with people back at ground, it's not been a perfect arrival." People looked at him silently, though a baby right as the back was wailing. When he was sure he had full attention, he started again. "Now we've landed, we've finally managed to contact an American governmental agency."

"Fuck yeah!" A bunch of American teens cheered, like animals. They were obviously party boys of some sort – Oscar's kind of people.

Wendy arrived from the cockpit and shushed those making a noise sternly so that the older air steward could continue:

"They told us that in America, there's been a problem," his voice was shaking. "For particular reasons, they can't tell us what that problem was," the whispering began again, people suddenly became ten times more panicked. "But something is happening. The airport has probably been evacuated for hours, but they told us that we're to wait inside the airport terminal, by the shops and restaurants, where there'll hopefully be food. Hopefully the army will be able to pick us up."

"We've connected to the terminal," Wendy informed them, probably inserting the message her co-worker had forgotten in his nervousness. "We'll pack our belongings now and make our way into the airport. We're _all_ to stay in a group, no splitting apart. We will wait for the army to arrive and then everything will be okay."

There was no call for affirmation. Oscar didn't know how he felt. It felt surreal, kind of like something that was going on in a movie. What the hell was going on? Why was it being kept under wraps? If the army were still functioning, surely it couldn't be _too_ bad… right?

The baby that had been crying was now screaming as everybody collected their hand luggage and stood, readily making their way towards the terminal. Some of them were tearful, some stared in the distance numbly, others were already screaming and panicking, requiring some kind of assistance.

Oscar was reasonably calm. If anything, he was just confused. As they slowly made their way to the terminal his sister looked much more affected. She was wavering between upset and panic, tears glistening in her eyes as she tried to regulate her breathing. Every five seconds she would try to use her phone, but Oscar guessed the signal was too bad.

* * *

Selene was terrified for her father. Ever since she had gone to college, she reconnected with him in a way she didn't expect. She had always been close to her mother, and it _was_ her mother who encouraged her intellectual development, but since going to the USA she had reconnected with somebody she had never expected to reconnect with. And now all of a sudden she couldn't reach him. Her phone shook in her tremulous hands as she desperately tapped the same buttons and over again but no was no _damn_ signal.

And her dad, stepmother and their kids didn't even begin to cover it. There was her mother back at home… Maybe this problem was only in North America, or the USA, or maybe it was only in New York or a segment of New York. So her family back in England would be okay, right? And then there were her college friends: Amanda, Finch, Cindy, Meghan and David…

"It'll be okay," for the first time in a while, Oscar showed sympathy. He smiled and squeezed his hand around hers. "It's probably something small."

"I hope so," Selene replied, her voice shaking.

Selene made her way towards the terminal with her brother, having nothing but her bag on her. The large group of passengers, led by the air stewards, eventually got to a large, circular room. Every time Selene had been to an airport the stores and food courts were busy, filled with excited vacationers or frustrated people who had been delayed.

Now there was nothing. The airport truly had been evacuated. It had been obvious that there were people there. Wrappers and packets had been left on the floor, and the place was generally dirty and in disrepair. Selene also conjectured that they had left in a hurry. She passed a store that sold perfume, stepping over shards where a whole display had been knocked over. She tried not to let it concern her too much, but there were trickles of blood on the floor.

What would have seriously led to this? Selene considered the possibilities and none of them quite corroborated with what she saw. It could have been a riot, but now people were gone wouldn't things return back to normal? Had the government somehow been overthrown? If so, why did the army still exist? Had there been some kind of disease? Nuclear warfare? _Something_?

They passed an airport convenience store. Selene automatically reacted when her brother reached up, grabbing large bottles of water and stuffing them into his rucksack.

"Oscar!" She hissed. "What the hell are you doing? You're stealing."

"I have a feeling the owners won't be back so soon," Oscar said coolly, moving onto food – he put large packets of crisps and other goods into his rucksack until it was bulging. "And if they do come back the missing water and food won't bother them too much," Selene had no idea what he meant.

"What is happening?" Selene ran her hand through her dark hair vulnerably. She was so unused to feeling like Oscar had all of the answers.

"I don't know, but it's bad," Oscar looked at her in the eyes. "When we get away from here we're going to have to find dad somehow. Maybe if the army can get here they'll help. There'll be some sanctuary or something. But we just need to be prepared for the worst."

Selene nodded, feeling like she was going to throw up. She felt kind of strong because she hadn't cried yet. Maybe that was about to change. Especially since she had been hiding a secret for a while… A secret she intended to tell Oscar.

"So, open your bag up, we're going to need to take as much water away as possible."

* * *

The public restroom's faucets were still working at least. Wendy looked at her reflection in the mirror. Her dark eyes stared back at her, tired and sore. She forced herself to do her best airhostess smile before she splashed some water over her face, trying to wake herself up.

Restrooms were never in perfect condition, that could be taken for granted, but Wendy was pretty certain that something had happened. Bar the mirror by the sink she was using, all of the mirrors had been shattered. Maybe it was nothing, but there was something wrong.

Another airhostess, Jenny, made her way into the restroom shyly. Wendy had worked with many of her co-workers for years. Jenny was actually quite new, so it made sense that she was particularly affected. Black smudges made her way around her eyes, probably because she didn't wear waterproof eyeliner.

Wendy faced her, forcing a smile.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," Jenny said unsurely. "It's just… Everyone is asking me what's going on. I don't even know what's going on."

"We'll be okay," Wendy made her way over to Jenny, putting a hand on her shoulder and smiling. "We just have to stay strong."

"I'm trying to contact my mom," Jenny said, her voices so quiet it barely made its way to Wendy's ears. "And I can't."

Wendy didn't know how Jenny felt. She lived in Minnesota for the past ten years. There had been family issues. When things got tough she just applied to be an airhostess and while it took some dedication she did it. She'd had fun, forgotten her difficult past and got to see some wonderful places. She didn't look back. And for the first time, she was wondering if that was something she'd regret.

Jenny cried into Wendy's shoulder for a bit. Wendy herself tried to hold back tears. Then they both made their way out of the bathroom, into an empty corridor. The ceiling was made out of glass, streaming the golden sunlight through. At least it was kind of warm.

They both made their way back to the other passengers. A lot of them had treated themselves to the bountiful food that had been left behind, and the pilots and stewards didn't stop them. In this situation, taking the food that had been left behind was the most sensible thing to do.

The other stewards, the pilot and the co-pilot had been busy herding people up and ensuring nobody strayed. At this point the passengers were thankfully compliant. The only people who had strayed were the British kids, the boy with dirty blonde hair and his darker haired sister. Wendy glanced at them talking quietly in a convenience store for a second before she reached her co-workers.

"What's the plan?" Wendy said, hands on hips as she faced the pilot.

"We're waiting for the army," he said.

Anthony, one of the stewards, put his hand on his hips and pouted at the pilot. "We don't know how long they're going to be," he said. "What if it's days? Or even weeks? We need food, water and other stuff."

"We have that stuff," her other co-worker, Damien, said. "Lots of it. I don't know. We can't wait around like sitting ducks."

"No, we can't," Wendy agreed. "Maybe we should look around the airport. Obviously we can't let the passengers get too far," Wendy glanced at the crowd of people, who ate in silence. Some looked on the edge of despair. A handful of people were still desperately trying to contact their families. They were still passengers, and Wendy was still in uniform, so she had some obligation to make sure that they were safe. "Maybe we should just check through security ourselves, see what's happening. If the army aren't here tomorrow we can check outside. If they're not here the day after, we go down the highway."

Jenny went a little paler.

"Guys, the army aren't going to mess around, do you really think they're going to take days?"

"I don't know what the hell is happening," the pilot sighed. "But the Asian lady has a good point."

"My name is Wendy," Wendy glared at him.

"Right. Wendy, why don't you check out security with him," the pilot pointed at Damien. "I doubt there'll be anything there, but if something is up report back. We won't be far away," he smiled at the co-pilot, who hadn't said a word. The poor guy was probably worried for his children.

"Aye, aye, Captain," Damien smiled, and him and Wendy strayed from the group completely. He had always had a good sense of humour. Wendy smiled, walking along with him as they strayed away from the terminal and used the airport signs to get to security.

"What do you think it is?" Wendy asked.

"Huh?"

"This disaster that's created…" Wendy glanced around the deserted airport. Along the corridors there were strewn bottles and even clothes. Weird. "This."

"Killer spiders?" Damien smirked. Wendy rolled her eyes. "I don't know. Maybe those crazy Christian street preachers were right about the end of the world and stuff."

"It won't be that bad," Wendy told him as they approached security.

It felt like a ghost town. There were long, empty queues where people once stood and grumbled. Bar the occasional dropped water bottle, or even an open suitcase that looked as if it had been thrown, there was nothing there.

"I hope so," Damien said tentatively, stepping over a suitcase and walking through a defunct metal detector. "I guess there are some things we can rule out."

"Yeah? Like what?"

"Nuclear bomb, big natural disaster, if that was the case wouldn't this be place obliterated?"

"It's been reduced to a dump," Wendy wrinkled her nose as a bad smell hit it. There was a chance that a nuclear bomb had hit somewhere – like New York City, for example. It would explain why people needed to be evacuated. There could be nuclear radiation, or whatever happened when nuclear bombs were dropped.

With that in mind, Wendy's stomach suddenly seemed to do ten thousand backflips at once. For a whole airport to be evacuated, something serious had to have happened. Warfare… Disease… Something just as threatening. And that meant that thousands of people may have already died, and if that wasn't the case, there was a real danger that many more lives were at stake. There was a chance that Wendy's life was at stake.

Wendy suddenly felt ten times more threatened when she noticed that one of the lights above were flickering on and off. Underneath the said light it looked like somebody alive – or potentially alive, anyway. It was a man, lying down head first in some kind of security uniform.

Damien ran his hands through his red hair.

"Is that person dead?" He was suddenly whispering.

"I don't know," Wendy whispered back. "M-Maybe I should check it."

"It's okay," Damien smiled down at her, squeezing her hand suddenly. "I'll check it. What's the worst that could happen, right?"

"Right," Wendy smiled unsurely. "You'll be fine."

Damien slowly made his way to the security guard, as if the man could spring up at any second. Wendy stepped aside, trying to angle herself to see the unconscious man as much as possible. He seemed kind of pale. His uniform was, oddly, still immaculate.

Eventually Damien managed to approach the security guard. He looked confused for a second, as if he didn't know what to do. He glanced back at Wendy unsurely as she lingered behind.

"Feel for a pulse," Wendy found herself loudly whispering – if that was possible.

Damien turned back towards the security guard, whose limp arm suddenly clutched at the desk. Wendy jumped. This movement initially shocked her, but when the security guard groaned her heart fluttered. He was alive. There was someone who was alive and probably even knew what was going on.

"Oh thank god he's okay," Wendy sighed as the man used his arms to support his body, leaning up. Damien seemed to go two shades paler – and considering how pale he was Wendy didn't consider that possible.

"What the…" Damien stepped back, his eyes widening.

"What's up?" Wendy asked, suddenly nervous again.

Damien suddenly looked terrified. He tried to step away, but by this point it was already too late. The security guard swung his head towards Damien's neck and clamped his teeth into Damien's jugular. Damien tried to scream, but he could only choke in his own blood which immediately began to splatter onto the floor.

Wendy screamed loudly as her friend fell to the floor, eyes wide open in terror as he continued to choke and gargle on his own blood. The security guard was unsatisfied by that one bite, throwing itself onto the floor and taking bite after bite while Damien was too weak to struggle.

That was no security guard. It was no live security guard, anyway. It looked human in theory but the rotting flesh around its face, the dead eyes and the rotten teeth and nails gave everything away. Wendy wiped tears from her eyes, torn between helping Damien or killing this thing.

Suddenly another security guard charged into the scene and Wendy turned and ran, tripping due to the high heels that she was wearing. She scrambled forward desperately but realised that this new security guard was a person: a large, burly African-American man.

He stomped on the security guard's skull, which imploded underneath his weight. He then gave Damien a particularly harsh fate, picking up the chair where the security guard initially lay and using it to bash into Damien's skull. The man was powerful: the first swing left a dent in Damien's skull, probably killing him immediately, but the next few swings smashed his head open _literally_.

Wendy couldn't even scream. Tears streamed down her face and she gagged at the sight and at the smell, too shocked or scared to even move. When the large man turned towards her she could do nothing but glance at him tearfully, only pleading.

"You weren't bit, were you?" The guy asked as Wendy pressed her back against the wall, sobbing.

"Y-You just killed them," she said, barely audible underneath the tears.

He just glanced at her regretfully. "Did one of those things bite you or scratch you?" She shook her head, silencing herself slightly. "Okay, you can live."

"Wh-Why?" She stood up, the anger hitting her. Tears were still streaming down her face. "Why the hell did you do that? He was my friend."

"He was going to die anyway," the man said regretfully. He was trembling, wearing dirty old security uniform. "Why did you scream?"

"I-" Wendy was cut off immediately by the man's shouting.

" _Why did you scream?_ "

Without thinking, she turned and ran away, sobbing.

* * *

Jermaine watched the petite airhostess run away in tears, immediately regretting how he had treated her. Whoever she was, he knew she didn't understand that the world was different now. She didn't seem to understand that the dead suddenly walked, that their bites were a death sentence and that they were attracted by noise.

No doubt they would come after she had screamed like a banshee. Suddenly he found himself realising why one would scream: you'd just witnessed the dead come alive and mutilate your friend, then some random guy jumps in and kills them both? How would anybody react in that situation?

Jermaine sucked in a breath and glanced at the two corpses. He wished he could have regretted taking their lives, but he knew that they were just going to come back as killers anyway. The redheaded corpse he didn't know, but it was a man with a life. Maybe if he got to the security customs earlier he could have prevented such a death.

And then there was Will, his co-worker who was just a mushy corpse on the floor. He had a wife and two kids. Now he was just a corpse on the floor with the top of his head smashed into smithereens.

He wished he'd had time to cry. He wished he had time to linger on _something… anything_. But they always came.

He glanced up and saw the horde of the undead leering their way towards him, moaning, groaning and snarling their symphony of death and despair, though they were large blocked by the security gates amongst other things, they would find a way to tear themselves through.

Following the girl's direction, he turned towards the terminal and ran.

* * *

"Are you going to eat?" Selene asked Oscar as the glanced at the cold burger in his hands. "That old guy offered you the burger, he found it in the old Burger King kitchens, you'd at least want to eat it."

"I dunno…" Oscar hated feeling spoilt, glancing at the burger again.

"Is it off?"

"No, it doesn't smell or look funny, it's just cold," Oscar took a bite out of it and immediately regretted it. "Guess we're not really going to be used to hot food. At least not until the army arri-"

Before he finished his sentence a scream pierced the room. The airhostess who had spoken to them earlier – Wendy – ran towards the food court, almost rushing into a display of sunglasses. Some people ran up to her to console her, but whatever had happened she seemed inconsolable.

She said the same incomprehensible things repeatedly as the pilot tried to talk to her. Whatever she saw must have been bad, immediately stirring the crowd into unrest. Oscar felt even more put off his burger, and Selene stood up to get a better glance at the girl as a crowd surrounded her; Selene herself looked extremely disturbed.

"We need to run…" The girl was shaking as she pilot got down to his knees to look her in the eyes; they sat her down on a comfortable looking seat. "We n-need to get out of here."

"Where the hell is Damien?" The pilot said agitatedly.

" _Damien is fucking dead_!" She screamed back into his face, as if she had said this a million times. The pilot's aged face dropped.

Oscar didn't know how he felt. It was the most horrifying sensation he had ever felt, but the individual emotions couldn't quite be explained. It was just horror and terror and confusion. Selene immediately grabbed Oscar's hand as the crowd went wild.

Immediately the screaming began, a large chorus of it. Many people stayed put and cried, but the majority of people charged around like headless chickens, directionless and terrified. Nobody dared question Wendy, who was on the verge of joining in on the crowd panic, all they needed to know was that this place was not safe.

Oscar slung his rucksack around his shoulders, picking up Selene's bag while she scrambled for her phone.

"Oscar, what the hell?" She said, almost ramming into a panicked passer by as she stood up.

"We need to get out of here," Oscar said hurriedly.

"Where do we go? The only way out is the way the airhostess went," Selene stressed, looking panicked and tear stricken. "And that way is obviously not safe."

"I don't know," Oscar told her. "But people are dying, we need to get out here." Selene snatched her bag from Oscar's grip.

* * *

As Jermaine rushed into the terminal, he only had a split second to glimpse around and see at least ten of the undead coming in after him. Thankfully, the airhostess who had ran away earlier had already set off the panic alarms and people were already running and screaming.

But the panic seemed to increase tenfold when they say rotting corpses animate and sentient. Having been off the blip for at least eight hours, they musn't have known of the outbreak that had struck the country that day. Screams were repeatedly heard as more undead streamed into the room, some even managing to get ahold of unfortunate people and taking a bite into their arm or neck.

Jermaine rushed up a flight of stairs, realising that there was no escape, even though people had already been panicked there was nothing that they could do except hide. The only way to leave was by going through security, and that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.

He looked down in horror at the scene. Down in the food court, it wasn't the living feasting. It was the dead.

He turned around to try and find an escape – somewhere, anyway – but just as he turned he was confronted by one of the undead. It looked like what used to be an elderly woman, a foot shorter than him. She gripped his arm and he attempted to launch her down onto the floor beneath, but she was much more eager than he anticipated.

He learned the hard way only hours before that the walkers were attracted by noise, but there were already more than enough in the vicinity, so he felt he was justified. Just as he reached for his gun the walker barely had any time to sink her teeth into her flesh, she made one last groan before she was launched off the balcony, shattering on the concrete floor below.

He was glancing at the face of the flight attendant who he had seen earlier. She was looking at him angrily with smudged make-up.

"I just saved your life," she said matter of factly.

"I had it under control," Jermaine replied, not sure if he really did.

She looked him up and down. She hated him; Jermaine could see that in her eyes. But whilst she was kind of new to the apocalypse thing Jermaine knew she wouldn't understand why he had to do what he did. But she didn't hate him enough to just let him die.

"I should have let you die," the girl said.

"Yeah? Well, there's a lot you need to learn," Jermaine immediately withdrew his gun and blasted the brain out of a walker that was approaching the flight attendant. She jumped, as if she thought he was going to attack her. When she glanced behind she looked sick.

"What the fuck has happened?" She said, glancing around and struggling to comprehend the carnage.

"A lot," Jermaine gripped her arm, dragging her away and firing at some walkers who were clambering up the stairwell. "But we'll move onto that once we're sure we're not going to be devoured."

Jermaine didn't know if that time would come.

* * *

The screams filled the air, suddenly giving Selene the worst feeling of terror. They were crammed at the back of the store, tucked away from whatever chaos had struck the people back in the terminal. Whatever had happened, it was not good. Whatever had happened, it was the reason that the airport had been evacuated in the first place.

"Oscar, please," Selene glanced back towards her brother, who was trying to pickpocket the door at the back of the shop. He was struggling. "We need to get out of here."

He smirked. How he could smirk at this particular moment, Selene didn't know. She was terrified for her own life… For _everyone's_ life. And yet he was so calm. There was urgency in his movements, but it wasn't urgent enough.

"I thought you didn't want to do this. I thought it may have been illegal," Oscar teased.

"It _is_ illegal!" Having studied law comprehensively, Selene liked to think that she knew what constituted legality and what didn't. "But I'm taking jail over god knows what's out there!"

Selene gripped an axe that had been stashed behind the counter – probably kept there for self-defence by a paranoid shopkeeper. She forced her brother out the way, struggling to keep balanced in her heels as she repeatedly swung the axe at the door's lock. The first swung put a dent in the lock, the second skewered it and by the first the door was shoved open.

It led into a very dimly lit corridor that had dirty walls and a dusty carpet. It hadn't been entered in a while. Selene glanced around, relieved. Her relief increased by ten fold when she saw the fire exit sign on the wall.

"We need to get out of here," Selene said, still holding the axe, almost hugging it close.

"Do you know how to get to dad's?"

"I need a car," Selene was trembling as they stormed through the corridor and down a stairwell, finally finding a fire exit. When she pushed the door open the liberating feeling of fresh air hit her face. Where the runway was supposed to be, there was nothingness. Just a large stretch of concrete with a highway around the perimeter; it was so terrifyingly empty. "Wherever we can find one."

"There's bound to be some at the car park," Oscar gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. The two siblings made their way across, noting that for now outdoors didn't seem to be as dangerous as whatever they had ran from. Selene, somehow, had yet to cry. She was just shocked and numb.

Eventually they ran, turning a corner so that the runway was out of sight. The parking spaces were mostly empty, but there was a large stretch of concrete filled with abandoned cars. This was it. This was exactly what Selene had been looking for.

She looked around and tried to keep her terror in check. She didn't know what she was expecting to jump out at any second. The screams back in the terminal sounded terrified, and the airhostess had claimed that the other guy had been killed.

Selene held in a scream as something gripped her hand, but it was her brother tearing her axe from her grip.

"Oscar, what the hell?" She walked after him and tried not to act shocked when Oscar used the axe to smash through a car window. Immediately the alarms began blazing. "What are you doing?"

"I believe it's called _car theft_." Oscar smiled.

"This isn't right…" Selene glanced around, the wind sending her hair astray as her brother reached in and managed to open the door from the inside. Once he rushed in, Selene rushed in next to him. She was in the passenger's seat, he in the driver's. "We don't have keys or anything. What the hell are we going to do?"

Oscar was immediately bending down, looking through the mechanics of the car. His eyes lit up when he found something in the glove compartment.

"Well, hot wiring is an option," he said.

"You know how to do that?" Selene oddly sounded scared. Her brother just turned and gave her a look, prompting her to sigh. The car's alarm was still screeching. "Just don't tell me how you learned it and get us the _hell_ out of here."

* * *

Once Oscar had hotwired the car he slammed his foot on the acceleration, desperately skidding away from what he assumed was the runway. He needed to find some kind of road or exit. He needed to get out of here and find some kind of emergency services, his father, _anyone alive._ His pulse raced as he realised that it was too late; the government planned to rescue everybody, but for some reason everybody was now dead - or so it seemed.

"I am so glad you're a delinquent shithead," Selene looked terrified next to him, occasionally casting a glance over her shoulder. Oscar also cast a glance and he saw something. Behind him there was some kind of crowd - _people?_ _Alive people?_ And yet, somehow, he also felt as if they were people that needed to be avoided at all costs. Just as he turned around to find an exit Selene released the biggest shriek ever. Oscar slammed his foot on the brake, the car skidding slightly as momentum dragged it forwards. It eventually slowed to a halt right in front of Wendy, the air hostess who Oscar had talked to earlier. Beside her was a less familiar face - a very tall, very stern faced African-American.

"I think I'm having a panic attack!" Selene shouted, matter of factly.

Wendy rushed to the side of the car, tapping well manicured fingers against it.

"Let us in, please let us fucking in!" She said desperately, mascara stained cheeks on show.

"How did you survive?" Oscar said, glancing at the taller male.

"You're no longer my customer," Wendy told Oscar calmly before slamming her palm onto the back seat's window. "So _fucking listen to me._ "

Oscar didn't need to be told twice. What sounded like roars grew louder behind them and when he glanced behind he could see _people._ Hordes of them. But there was something off about them; maybe it was their tattered clothes, their vacant expressions or - just maybe - it was the fact that their flesh was rotting. Oscar tried to neutralise his horrified expression as the two other survivors bundled themselves into the backseat of the car. He just knew he had to get away, and slammed his foot onto the accelerator. He wasn't used to American cars, or driving on the right side of the road in general, but fuck it.

* * *

Eventually they were speeding down the highway. The outbreak had started early that morning, and Jermaine had hidden in the zombie-infested airport, convinced that there was no escape. Now that a plane had finally descended into the chaos it seemed as if he had found three people who had managed to get away. He'd already felt somewhat connected to Wendy, who just stared out of the window and sobbed. She must have left a lot behind, and she must be recovering from seeing her co-workers get eaten. A raven-haired, well dressed girl sat in the passenger seat, trying to stabilise her breaths.

Oscar was the one who interested him most. Despite everything that was happening, the kid seemed to have his head screwed on in the right place. Wendy wasn't stupid, but just like most people who'd struggled to shift into survival mode. Oscar only took a split second.

Jermaine glanced at the highway. There was nobody there. There were no cars, bar the occasional abandoned one that was left at the side of the road. It was absolutely terrifying.

"Does anyone have anywhere we can go?" Wendy said to them, quietly. "I live in Minnesota, I don't even know my way around here."

"Neither do I," Oscar admitted.

"What the fuck? So why is Mr. Tea and Crumpets driving the fucking car?" Jermaine said impulsively.

Selene turned around, angered. " _I_ know my around, Mr. Freedom and McDonalds," it was the first time she'd spoken it what must be twenty minutes. "We're going to our father. H-He'll know what to do."

"Where does he live?"

"Outskirts of Buffalo, in an apartment," Selene smiled weakly. "I-I have the keys."

Jermaine didn't speak. They really had been off the radar for a couple of hours. Jermaine doubted that cities were the safest place to go. If airports could crowd so quickly with the walking dead, then cities certainly could. But if they were on the outskirts, maybe it was a little safer. Maybe Oscar and Selene's father had been long dead. Even though it was a pretty important decision, Jermaine didn't want to argue. They were completely directionless otherwise; Wendy lived in another state and he had relatives in Lackawanna, though he didn't want to go there. His family business had been messy for a while, and he hadn't planned to return.

"We might encounter some of those freaks," Jermaine told them, showing them his gun. "This isn't much but it's all we have. If we want to kill those things, it has to be by gunshot."

"A gunshot to the head," Wendy said beside him.

"A gunshot to the head," Jermaine repeated emptily as they began to pass a sign which directed them into Buffalo.

* * *

 **I hope that was a sufficient dive into the action :)**

 **I'm so sorry to those in NY - I'm going to be as realistic as possible but I don't _live_ in New York, so this is a semi-fictionalised version of New York, I guess. That means that while locations will be real (e.g Buffalo-Niagra Airport), they're not going to be totally true to life because a. things will need to be fictionalised for the drama and b. because there are very big gaps in my knowledge. **

**Also, forums will now be up and linked on my profile! If you want to be moderator, PM me. I can't make everyone a moderator, but yeah, I think I shouldn't be the only person running the forums. Also, for those who are eager to see their character be introduced, the first submitted characters will make a cameo in the next chapter, and then chapter 4 will see the majority of submitted characters make an appearance. However, some aren't actually going to be making an appearance until well into the story.**

 **ALSO - I still have open spaces. So submit, peoples. Preferably men.**

 _ **~Toxic**_


	3. Refuge

_Thou seemest human and divine,_

 _The highest, holiest manhood, thou._

 _Our wills are ours, we know not how;_

 _Our wills are ours, to make them thine._

* * *

 _Day 1_

* * *

"H-Here," Selene pointed down a long road. "The apartment is here."

Selene didn't actually live with her father, even though she had the keys. She attended Cornell University, a two hour drive away. Sometimes she'd visit for weekends, and obviously she went back to England in the holidays. Regardless, her father's apartment was one of the many places that Selene called home. They were surrounded by large, attached buildings that trailed down the streets.

Whatever had been creeping around the airport wasn't here. Or it didn't seem to be here, at least. The streets were completely empty. The lawns had been mowed. The cars were parked at the side of the road. The only thing that was missing were people; there were no kids coming home from school, the newspaper delivery boy didn't speed down the road on his bicycle and there didn't seem to be any kind of life. It was an eerily well kept ghost town.

"P-Park here," Selene pointed a shaky finger at one side of the road where there was an open garage door. Oscar complied, shakily speeding the car into the garage. He almost crashed into a shelf of mechanical tools.

"Fuck, your parking skills are crazy," Jermaine complained, the first time he'd spoken for a while. Wendy was still silent, staring blankly at her knees.

"In England we just park at the side of the road. Unless you're rich," Oscar explained, stopping the car. Hopefully he'd never have to drive an American car again.

"Fucking Brits," Jermaine opened the car door, hopping out of it. Selene knew Oscar would've usually smiled or relished in the banter, but inside he was probably as affected as everyone else. Selene knew he couldn't pretend that he hadn't escaped a scene where he could've died. He couldn't pretend that he hadn't heard so many others die. When Selene glanced at her brother, she saw that he'd gone pale and sweaty. Hopefully that would be the worst it would get, and after that there'd be no more death. Selene didn't feel like they'd be that lucky.

"Come on, Oscar," Selene opened the door, unfastened her seatbelt and slipped out of the car. Wendy followed her, almost robotically. "W-We'll just go and see dad."

* * *

Oscar didn't want to point it out, but their dad's garage door had been left open. Oscar assumed that their dad usually had a car parked in the garage, too. Chances were that there was somebody who wasn't here. When Oscar exited the stolen car, he followed Selene, who led the way. Selene went up a flight of metallic, creaky stairs, with everybody else hot on her heels. When she walked along an iron balcony and stopped at one of the dark wooden doors, she pressed the doorbell and stood still, waiting.

Oscar smirked imagining their father answering the door and seeing the most strange, random group of people. His two children with a timid looking air hostess and a six-foot-four African American.

But nobody answered the door.

Selene pressed the doorbell again. The sound of it ringing was faintly heard inside. Unsatisfied with the lack of response, she knocked on the door a few times. Growing increasingly desperate, she began to slam her hands on the door, and then her feet. This automatically put Jermaine into life. He grabbed Selene's arm, roughly forcing her backwards.

"What the-"

"Girl, shut the fuck up," he told her harshly. Selene's eyes widened. She wasn't used to being talked to like that, and Oscar saw it affected her. "You do know noise attracts those things, right?"

Oscar grabbed Selene this time, albeit more gently. He forced her out of Jermaine's grip and looked the man right in the eyes. Jermaine had to be half a foot taller than Oscar, but he wasn't going to stand there and let somebody talk to his sister like that.

"Don't touch my sister like that again, or we're going to have problems," Oscar said firmly. "We have the keys. We don't need to be ringing any doorbell or knocking."

Selene glanced between the two men, terrified once again. She repressed a whimper and just nodded, removing the keys her father had given her and slotting them into the lock. After unlocking the door, she forced it open and they all stepped inside the cozy albeit thin corridor. Pictures of the happy family Oscar never had adorned the walls, a slightly dusty red carpet lay at his feet. This would be where he would stay, before this disaster happened. Now it _had_ happened. Looked like he was here anyway, no matter what happened.

Selene slipped off her blazer, neatly hanging it up. Oscar kind of liked how everybody was now acting like they weren't in the middle of some kind of disaster. After the door was closed (and _tightly_ locked) Selene turned around and walked with that confidence and command she usually had.

"This way to get to the kitchen," Selene told all of them. "I really need some cocoa, or something."

* * *

Wendy still felt kind of empty inside. Ever since seeing Damien die, or seeing all those people getting devoured back in the terminal, she didn't know what to think. The dead were suddenly walking and eating people - that was enough to make her feel sick. And then there was the fact she felt a permanent sense of danger, the fact society seemed dead and the fact she didn't know how her family in Minnesota were. She'd had problems with them, but she hoped to god that they were okay.

The British kids' father's kitchen was a small, comfortable kitchen. Wooden counters were spread across the perimeter. Wendy felt uneasy every time she saw a scrawled, messy child's drawing, or any sign that a family lived here.

"Dad?" Selene was calling out meekly as she walked, her tone losing hope. "I-It's just us..." She paused. "It's Selene and Oscar."

"Kind of coincidental that it's the end of the world when I decide to visit dad after so many years," Oscar sat down at the kitchen counter. "Almost like fate never wants us to meet up."

"Shut up, Oscar," Selene turned to her brother, tearful. "Now isn't the time. Dad is probably gone somewhere. I don't know. Maybe he'll be back soon, right?"

Wendy, Jermaine and Oscar all exchanged glances while Selene's back was turned. Nobody wanted to tell the girl that she was wrong, but chances were she _was_ wrong. Wendy's stomach began to tie itself into multiple, tight knots at the prospect of never seeing her family again. That was a realisation that almost all of them probably had to come to. Oscar was affected too, but much more calm about it. Poor Selene was definitely not in a good place emotionally. Jermaine seemed the most cool; he seemed almost unaffected, even.

Selene poured herself a glass of water. It seemed like water systems weren't off just yet, which was good. For the time being it seemed like they didn't have to worry about dehydrating to death. She took a second to breathe before she forced the water down. Wendy awkwardly let herself sit down. Jermaine, who seemed to fill the kitchen, relocated himself to the doorway. After a second, Selene joined Oscar and Wendy at the table.

Wendy found herself speaking up. She turned to Jermaine.

"You know what's happening," she said to him. "We just landed two hours ago to _this_. You've been here longer."

"Me?" Jermaine paused as the siblings also turned to look at him. "Well, yeah," he conceded. "It only happened eight hours ago. I don't know what's happening. You know all those riots that have been brewing up the past couple of days? And reports of a flu strain or something?" Everyone nodded. "Well it turned out that they _weren't_ riots." Oscar's face dropped, as if his worst fears had been confirmed. Jermaine didn't want to press on, but did. "At first the stories of the dead raising were dismissed as conspiracy theories. The government tried everything to hush it, hence the airports running this morning..." He sucked in a breath. "But they weren't. When businesses were shutting down and cities were being evacuated, that's when we realised it got bad. It broke out at the airport like five years ago. Those who didn't die ran away, except me."

Oscar wasn't speaking. He stood up and walked out, but Selene gave Jermaine and Wendy a glance.

"He's scared about our mum," she explained. "H-He just sulks. He always sulks." She purposely avoided Wendy's concerned gaze. "Carry on."

"I don't know much, but I know some things," Jermaine was speaking quietly as if he were telling secrets. "Those things spread by biting. When they bite you, you get sick."

"And then you die?"

Jermaine shrugged. "Only saw one woman suffer after being bitten. She got a bad fever very quickly. I don't think it ends well."

"And the only way to kill them is a bullet to the head?" Selene said.

"Head trauma in general," Wendy said out loud. Selene gave her a quizzical look, and Wendy elaborated, her voice cracking slightly. "When one of those things a-attacked Damien he killed them with his foot, and with a chair."

Selene stared at Jermaine with a horrified expression.

"I did what I had to do," Jermaine argued, his voice hushed and calm but with a sense of urgency. "Why won't you learn that?"

Selene's gaze turned back to Wendy who suddenly felt fury flash red hot around her. Jermaine was trying to justify himself for killing her _friend?_ The angry tears came and Wendy didn't respond, she just stood up and tried to wipe the stained mascara off her face. Wanting to be anywhere but with him, she barged past him, purposely shoving into him as she made her way out of the hallway and out into the kitchen.

* * *

 _Day 3_

Selene had thanked the god that civilisation hadn't completely died, even though it was definitely on life support. The past few days in the apartment had been very tense, and it was obvious that something was wrong and that the apartments' new inhabitants were traumatised. Wendy and Jermaine would always avoid each other and Oscar would avoid everyone, so she felt kind of isolated. But water and gas were working perfectly well, meaning that they could shower and eat. Electricity was much more hit and miss; some radio channels were still on - they would issue health and safety warnings, but would say little else. Whenever the four listened to the radio the feeling of doom inflated a lot more and they'd be left with a sour taste in their mouths.

As usual, Selene had been the responsible one. She made sure that everybody would eat (and she was thankful her half siblings ate junk food - there was enough ramen noodles to last a month or two). She made sure that she and Wendy got out of their impractical outfits, heels and all. Selene had leftover clothes in her dad's room, and Wendy was petite like her step mother. The boys couldn't wear anything - Oscar was shorter than her father and Jermaine taller and broader, but thankfully their clothes weren't impractical, though they were dirty.

Just as Selene had served everybody ramen noodles again, Wendy glanced out of the kitchen window and smiled at the sound of a car passing.

"That's the two hundredth car since we've been here," Wendy said to herself, smiling. "It's nice to know we're not the only people who are alive. It's nice to know that there's a lot of people who are alive." Selene said nothing, washing her plate and staring into the sink mournfully. Her father still hadn't returned home. Where had he gone? "Sometimes I want to go out there, ask any of those cars if they're heading out of the state. I miss my family."

"I'm sure they're okay," Selene said weakly. She wondered how many people had died... Thousands... Hundreds of thousands... Maybe even millions. But most people had to be alive, right?

"Why don't we go out of this place?"

"Because we don't know where those _things_ are," Selene dried the plate she held, her hands shaking. "They could be anywhere. And we know what they do. We've seen it first hand."

"But we haven't seen any since we got here..."

"That doesn't mean they're not around."

Selene liked Wendy, she really did, so she didn't want to debate with her. After leaving the plate at the side of the sink in an uncharacteristically sloppy fashion, she sat back down at the kitchen table and sighed while rubbing her temples. Every single day she felt empty. Every single day she wanted to cry. Every single day she tried to not to think about the awful situation she was in, the sickness she felt. Her mood had been everywhere, and she knew that Wendy was the only one who could currently carry a conversation - she didn't want to blow that relationship with her.

"Just how long do we stay here until we decide we have to go?" Wendy sighed. "I've been sleeping in a bed intended for a five year old the past few days. I may be short, but even then..."

"I don't know, okay?" Selene turned and faced Wendy for the same time. She felt the tears stream again. "I haven't planned ahead. I don't want to plan ahead. Because I'm scared about what's ahead. I'm scared about the kind of plans I have to make."

* * *

 _Day 5_

Oscar and Selene shared their dad's bed. The sheets were silky and considering right outside their little bubble the world was falling apart, it was kind of nice. Jermaine would sleep on the couch in the living room and Wendy would sleep on the half-sister Oscar never met's bed. But Oscar and Selene would lie there together, listening to the sound of their own breaths calmly. Oscar found it the most comforting thing in the world. He'd spent the past five days just lying there, terrified. Terrified for his mother. Terrified for his friends. Hell, even terrified for his dad.

He hoped England was faring a lot better than America was. Maybe the government had done something useful. Maybe his mother and friends were safe and sound. Maybe this disaster didn't even spread to it and he was just the most unlucky guy in the world.

"Stop kicking, Oscar," Selene hissed.

"Oh shush, you're one to talk," Oscar leaned up, supporting himself with one arm. "You always fidget when you're asleep." He paused. "And you snore."

Selene turned around, glaring at him.

"No. I do not."

"Do so."

She looked genuinely upset. "You're saying that just to mess with me."

Oscar laughed. "Yeah, I am." She turned back around, pissed off, prompting Oscar to laugh harder. "Seriously Selene? This is why I missed you. End of the fucking world and you're getting upset because you're self conscious that you snore."

"You missed me?" Selene said, no tone in her voice.

"I did."

She turned around, smiling this time.

"So the boy _does_ have feelings," both of them spent a silent second smiling at each other. "When I moved to the U.S for college five years ago, I was terrified that you didn't miss me. Because I missed you and mum every single day. And I'd count down the days until Christmas, or Easter, or mum's birthday, just so excited to come home to rain and driving on the left side of the road and tea and toast and my family," she smiled even deeper, showing off her dimples. "And then when I got back to England you'd just be unresponsive. And then I regretted everything, because the last four years before I moved were spent angsting over exams and not appreciating the little things, like my stupid little brother."

"I'm not good with feelings," Oscar shrugged. "I was happy when you came home, but I was pissed off every day. It felt like dad moved away at the first chance he got. And then suddenly you did too. I'm fed up of feeling abandoned and..." he took a breath. "I resented you. I was just a shithead and you were you, the clever girl who studies law in a top U.S University. I'm lucky if I get a job in a shitty shop."

Selene smiled.

"I'd never have the presence you do."

"What presence?" Oscar sniggered.

"On my ninth birthday, when you were five, mum spent so much money on a cake," Selene laughed. "It was the best cake I'd ever seen. Like those cakes on television. We leave for five seconds and come back into the kitchen and see the whole top layer had been picked off by grubby little hands. And I had never had my heart broken so much," Selene smiled. "But when I saw you sitting in the corner of the kitchen, with that stupid smile you still have, I looked at you and thought 'this guy. This guy is going to be some guy.'"

"Am I some guy?"

Selene smiled. "You are. And even though we're alone and so far away from home, I'm just glad you're here."

Oscar slumped down, relaxing in the bed again.

"I'm glad, too," Oscar said, meaning it. He turned around and went to sleep.

* * *

 _Day 7_

Jermaine sat listening to the radio. It was crackly and pretty crap, but it was better than nothing. For the first time in forever he'd heard some news: apparently the military had been in Buffalo. He perked up a little bit, barely managing to hear anything the independent reporter had to say before the whole thing went dead completely. He was completely infuriated, and glared across at the British kids who had been comfortable on the sofa, laughing and joking about like nobody's life was at stake.

"It would help if you guys shut the fuck up," Jermaine snapped.

Oscar and Selene glanced at each other, and to Jermaine's chagrin they looked completely amused. He curled his fists up and refrained from saying anything else that was nasty. He'd had enough of this, and he was really beginning to worry for his kids. He'd managed to keep his kids out of his mind, and he'd been a bad father, but he realised that they were in danger and no matter how much he tried to numb that the feeling of intense worry clawed at him.

"You know, we have a word in Britain for people like you," Oscar relaxed slightly.

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"Wanker."

Jermaine stood up, furious. "You think I don't know what the fuck a wanker is? I watched enough _Trainspotting_ to know that wanker ain't a good word. Do you really want to piss me off, little boy?"

Wendy made a noise in the kitchen that prompted all three to forget the dispute and turn their heads. Jermaine was the first to rush to her aid, pushing out of the living room and rushing down the hallway. When he went into the kitchen, Wendy was sitting beneath the window. She looked shocked and scared. He immediately reached for his gun, glancing around.

"What happened?" Jermaine stepped closer to the kitchen table, which was cluttered with dirty plates. "What's up?"

"There is a _lot_ up," Wendy whispered. "I looked at the apartments across the street and I saw someone."

Soon Selene and Oscar were right behind Jermaine, looking equally puzzled.

"You saw someone? Who?"

"I don't know," Wendy snapped, calming down. "He was old. And balding."

"How descriptive, Veronica fucking Mars," Oscar said angrily, prompting an offended glare from Wendy. "He probably just lives here." He paused. "But Jermaine, I think it's good we get that gun handy. We don't know what kind of people we're up against," Oscar had seen enough to know people could generally do shitty things. Now the police weren't exactly present that made those bad people even more of a threat. "But don't stress out too much," he emphasised. "It's probably nothing."

"Nothing? Well there's one of _them_ out there," Wendy hissed.

"A crawler?" Jermaine said. Oscar's heart skipped a beat.

"Whatever you want to call them, they're _out there_."

Jermaine and Selene immediately rushed to the kitchen window, glancing outside desperately, probably for different reasons. The corpse - if you could call it that - of an old lady strolled down the road, moaning hungrily. Her skin had barely decomposed, her hair fell messily around her tattered dress. Wendy was still hidden, though the monster outside definitely didn't notice that they were there. Next to Jermaine, Selene whimpered and covered her mouth with her hands.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," before Jermaine could ask anything she rushed over to the kitchen sink. She leaned over it, retching. Oscar rushed over to her, looking concerned as he rubbed her back, not crying but definitely looking upset. "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god..."

Wendy stood up, glancing at Selene.

"She's not related to you, is she?"

"No," Selene eventually managed to say, she turned around and wiped her eyes again. "She isn't. She's Mrs. Du Hane. She babysat our little half sister Lily from time to time. She was a nice lady. And now she's..."

"She's not dead," Wendy said reproachfully. "Maybe she's diseased or something. They'll find a cure eventually." Jermaine snorted. Whoever turned into one of those things was definitely dead, and there was no bringing them back.

* * *

Mari put her hands on her hips as she watched Joseph slip his binoculars over his eyes, once again peering outside the window. The wizened man ducked when he saw he was spotted, and peeked again. She wondered what he saw. She would usually look herself but she kept an eye on the door as Jaime searched through the kitchen cupboards, throwing canned good into their rucksack. These were two of the many people she was stuck with. She didn't trust any of them, but while the world was going to shit and she didn't know what was going on, she figured there was safety in numbers.

"Well, what do you see?"

"One of them's out there alright," Joseph mumbled with his Southern drawl.

"And the people across the street?" Mari slipped the rifle that was strapped behind her back, holding it. "Do they look like they need to eat a bullet?"

Joseph glanced at her. "Put that thing down girl, before you take someone's head off," Mari scowled and complied, not telling Joseph that she was pretty much a pro with guns. Joseph seemed like a nice person, but he definitely had a tendency to play the leader or the morally superior one. When they'd bumped into each other at camp on the outskirts of Buffalo the first thing he said to her was that she showed too much cleavage. She glanced at Jaime, who was still raiding the place. She hadn't developed an opinion on him. He seemed very quiet. Very devoted to his family.

"There's more of 'em," Joseph said, peering out the window quickly.

"So not just the Asian girl?"

"Nope, there's a negro, another guy and another girl," Joseph paused. "Maybe they could use our help."

Mari decided to spare Joseph a lesson on political correctness. "There's already a load of us back at camp."

"And we could do with more," Joseph gripped onto the windowsill, struggling to stand up. He was an old man, which certainly didn't do him any good. But he was fit for his age, and didn't slow Mari down. "More people means more defence, more people to scavenge. They could do us a lot of good."

"Or a lot of bad."

Joseph paused. Mari liked that he was a guy who commanded respect, and was picky in who he gave his respect too. It was actually quite satisfying to see him nod in agreement.

"I think that's everything," Jaime held a bulging rucksack close, smiling politely at the two, as if he wasn't happy to ruin their conversation. "So are we leaving the people across the street alone?"

Before Joseph could reply, there was a sound that made them all jump out of their skins. Mari was the first to react, her rifle in hand as she rushed to the window. Looked like the old monster across the street had stumbled into an abandoned car which was now perfectly happy to send an alarm screech around the street for all to hear. Frustrated, she shot the thing's brain out quickly, sending organs and blood across the pavement.

Mari flicked her hair out of her eyes as she saw that the alarm had attracted more than its fair share of monsters. There didn't seem to be any at first, but suddenly there were a shitload. They crawled out of garages, houses, or just about every unexpected nook and cranny. Soon they were flooding the street outside, moaning and groaning as they looked around desperately for the source of the noise. When Mari glanced across the house she made eye contact with another kid, a boy with blue eyes and dirty blonde hair.

"What's happened?" Joseph said behind her, sounding concerned.

"Houston..." Mari slipped her rifle across her back, turning to the two men and glancing at each of them in turn. "We have a problem."

* * *

 **IT'S OFFICIAL - Your characters are going to start making their appearances!**

 **There's over 30 of them, and it's highly unrealistic 30 or so survivors will be bundled up together all at once. The majority will be introduced in chapter 5 (and 3 other characters in chapter 4), but some others will be sprinkled around the story too. All characters will be introduced by chapter 18-19. I know it's frustrating, but bear with me here just to make the story that bit more spicy :)**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Many of the scenes popped into my head last minute, but I really liked them. I feel like I too am learning a little more about Oscar, Selene, Jermaine and Wendy as time goes on.**

 **Also: I'm sorry in advance for future/present characters who are racist/homophobic/sexist etc to mild or even violent degrees. I wanted to censor out the word 'negro', because even though there are worse words I kind of associate it with racism. But people who've read my previous fics know I'm not one to censor how awful people can be, and forms of prejudice and discrimination are one of the many ways we can be awful. Not that Joe is an awful person - he's just not exactly fit for tumblr. There are going to be way worse displays of prejudice. So yeah, sorry.**


	4. Escape

_Than that the victor Hours should scorn_

 _The long result of love, and boast,_

 _'Behold the man that loved and lost,_

 _But all he was is overworn._

* * *

 _Day Seven_

* * *

Jareck rushed around the camp with his bubble wand in hand, waving it around and laughing with delight as the stream of bubbles dashed through the air. Since his cousin, aunt, whatever she was – Mari – had looked after him he'd had the best time ever. With his parents far away, Mari didn't force half as many rules on him and she'd even taken him camping.

The drawback was the people. They'd bumped into a load of strangers and - for whatever reason - decided to camp together. It was kind of confusing. Why did everybody look sad? Maybe it was the hot weather. Everybody was walking around with blank faces, or they'd remain in their tents all day like hermits. People in the camp didn't talk much, and when they did they made sure that Jareck was not involved in their hurried and hushed conversations. Jareck wasn't that stupid, he knew not everything was good right now, especially after all those riots around New York.

He shrugged, deciding that it wasn't worth lingering on it anyway if the grown ups were going to solve everything. He jumped up on a log, making sure he was in the adult's line of sight as Mari had recommended. He rushed across the log, blowing a shower of bubbles around.

He paused when he heard something crackly. Oh. The walkie-talkies Mari used to contact people! He grabbed the walkie-talkie off the log as Mari had instructed, pressing the button down to hear what she had to say.

"Jareck," Mari said sternly, her voice somewhat obscured by static. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything is amazing!" Jareck hopped off the log smiling. "How are you, Mari? Are you having fun? Have you seen anything new? Where are your guns?"

"Look, I need you to do something for me-"

"Mari, I have something cool to tell you, I saw a frog! I almost caught it!"

"That's great, kid, but-"

"And I almost-"

"Jareck," her voice grew firmer. "I want you to listen to me."

Suddenly Chelsea was there. Jareck seemed a lot more intimidated now. She glanced at him in the same way the adults did, even though she was younger than he was – and she wasn't even taller than him, either! Chelsea and Jareck stared each other down for a second. Jareck liked Chelsea. He liked everyone. But there was something weird about her. She didn't play much.

She wasn't from around New York, either. She had a Southern accent, like in the movies. Mari and him found Chelsea in New York when the riots were really bad and they'd rescued her. Since then, she hadn't really spoken much. Maybe she was really sad like everybody else.

"What's up?" She said.

"Nothing," Jareck said earnestly.

Chelsea's dark hands grabbed the walkie-talkie from Jareck's grip. He didn't really protest as she spoke into it.

"What's up, Mari?" She said, sitting on the log.

"Pass the walkie-talkie to Maige, please, Chelsea," Jareck watched Chelsea shrug and call Maige over. In a split second a tanned woman with warm yet scrutinising eyes approached the two kids. She gave them brief yet kind smiles and took the walkie-talkie for herself.

"Hit me," she said sternly.

"Maybe your dad is best explaining this," Mari said. There was a pause and the sound of some kind of fuss before a deeper voice with a Southern drawl took over:

"Hey honey, there's been a problem where we're at. We've found plenty of supplies, but one of the creepers just set off an alarm. We're going to have to find our way out." Maige looked displeased. "Nothing too bad. You know your old pops is a fighter."

"Just be careful," Maige sat down next to Chelsea. Jareck grew much more interested in a dandelion at his feet. "I know you can be a reckless old man."

"Who are you calling old?" Joe chuckled.

"What? Want me to lie and say you're Channing Tatum?" Maige laughed a little. "I'll make sure you have some coffee when you get back," She paused, thinking. "I love you."

"I love you too."

His voice disappeared just as Jareck blew the dandelion seeds through the air, watching them drift and fly around a solemn looking Chelsea and Maige.

* * *

Wendy watched in horror as the alarm screeched outside. The once silent street was now teaming with multiple monsters. She couldn't see them anywhere. By this point, she was positive she wasn't deluded when she'd told everyone she'd seen people across the street; they too were watching the scene below with horror. One was an aged man, another tough faced girl and a more younger, somewhat handsome guy.

"Fuck me," Jermaine mumbled at the scene below.

"At least we're safe…" Wendy said unsurely. Some people weren't quite so convinced: behind her, Selene was trying really calmly to control her breathing; her brother was failing to comfort her.

Trying to keep calm and not make a fool out of herself like she had at the airport, Wendy made sure to close the window shutters, blocking out the scene outside. She didn't know if those things outside could see them from that distance – and if they could see them, would they know how to get to them? It was doubtful, but Wendy wasn't one to take chances.

Nobody protested as the kitchen was put into darkness, the sunlight outside suddenly obscured. Selene rushed over to the sink and desperately drank water directly from the tap, her brother behind her. Jermaine rubbed around his temples, evidently stressed out. It was rare Wendy was the one who felt the most calm.

"I don't know, maybe they'll move away eventually," Wendy said tentatively. "We have enough food to last us another couple of weeks…"

"Assuming the power doesn't leech out," Jermaine interjected. Wendy glared at him, prompting him to carry on. "What you giving me that look for, lady? You know it's true. And when we do run out of stuff and they're still there, what the fuck do we do then? We'd have two choices: starve, or feed the monsters outside."

"I guess there's suicide," Selene said weakly, choking on tears.

"No!" Wendy snapped, glaring at Jermaine and then Selene. "I saw my co-worker die, right in front of my eyes. One of those monsters leaned in and took a big bite out of his neck. His eyes were wide and he was terrified," she turned to Jermaine. "You saw your co-workers get devoured, too."

Jermaine glared at Wendy, and then nodded regretfully. She turned back to the British kids.

"You two haven't seen what we've seen," she said. "You haven't seen people who would be fucking overjoyed to be in your shoes. Suicide isn't an option, not now. We're not going to give up like that."

"Well, what do we do then?" Selene was calmer. She sat down at the kitchen table.

Wendy paused, not having any idea what she could do. There was a massive pause as something hammered on the door. Selene was taken aback and screamed a little bit while Jermaine, Oscar and Wendy all glanced at the apartment door, terrified.

"The kids hide," Jermaine said, taking out his gun and handing the axe over to Wendy. "We'll take this."

"Okay," Wendy said, holding the axe unstably. She didn't know how to use an axe. She didn't want to have to use an axe.

The fists continued to hammer on the front door, growing more desperate and much louder. No moaning or groaning could be heard outside. As Selene and Oscar rushed under the kitchen table Wendy and Jermaine moved forwards. Wendy's eyes were wholly focused on the door, and the walk to it seemed to last hours even though it was five minutes. When she reached the front door she found herself forcefully controlling her breathing.

"We go for the kill straight away," Jermaine told Wendy, who nodded. He undid the latch and slowly opened the door, which was still being hammered on.

Wendy screamed and stupidly leapt backwards as a tall figure rushed through the door. Jermaine immediately reacted, trying to aim his gun as hands gripped his arms, forcing the barrel of the gun to point to the ceiling. Wendy was about to swing the axe until she realised it was a girl. A human girl. The girl who she'd seen across the street. She didn't look happy at all, to put it lightly.

"What. The. Fuck?" The girl snapped, glaring at each of them in turn. Her gaze lingered on Jermaine a little longer. "If you value your balls, you wouldn't point a gun at me ever again."

Jermaine forced himself out of the girl's grip and raised his hands in defeat.

"I'm glad I got the right apartment," the girl slammed the door behind her, slipping the latch across and making sure it was locked. "I wasn't prepared to be zombie food." Wendy noticed the sheer amount of weapons the girl had on her. She must have been strong to be able to carry it all. "I'm Mari, by the way."

"What are you doing?" Wendy tentatively asked.

"Nice to meet you too," Mari glared at her. "For your information, I'm here to save your sorry asses before something bad happens to you. I know, I'm Jesus, thank me later," she walked down the hall into the kitchen. "Pack up all the supplies you have, you'll need them. And grab blondie and Gucci, thanks."

* * *

Selene didn't want to go. Unlike Jermaine, Wendy and even Oscar she didn't stay at her father's for survival. She stayed there because it was the only home she had left which she could go to – wherever she walked there were memories. Watching bad television with him, studying in the kitchen as her stepmother made great food. It was all there. As she walked down the hall, her backpack bulging with food, water and other things, she took a moment to remember those memories one last time.

Tears began to flow from her eyes, and while everybody else noticed they didn't say anything. She didn't want to go. A part of her also hoped that her father would return. It had only been a week. A part of her deep inside was still vouching for him, his wife and little Lily to walk through the front door with smiles on their faces.

Selene didn't know what made her cry much: the fact that it didn't happen or the fact that it probably wouldn't happen anyway.

Maybe he wasn't dead. Maybe he was in some military base somewhere, safe and sound. Maybe he'd gone down to Nebraska, where his wife's family lived. They'd have relatives there. Maybe it was safe there.

They exited from the apartment, standing around the balcony outside. The zombies hadn't just filled the road around the corner; they were on the opposite road, too. Thankfully they seemed docile and didn't note the five people standing around metres above them. Selene could only hope that they were all that stupid. If they were intelligent she probably had no chance of survival.

"I don't want to go," Selene admitted, sniffling.

Oscar squeezed her hand. "You have me."

Selene smiled at her brother. She'd actually enjoyed seeing his more gentle side in the past few days. Disaster really did bring out the best in some people at times. However, she found herself needing to be honest. She immediately regretted the words when they came out of her mouth:

"That's not enough."

Oscar didn't react. He just glanced her up and down neutrally, probably trying to avoid any hurt. Fortunately Mari jumped in on time.

"Look, girl," Mari had a good few inches of Selene so was able to size Selene up quite easily. Selene was exceptionally intelligent and dedicated, but physicality was not something she was good at. Mari was. "You either come with us or you die. It's a pretty simple choice."

Selene stiffened, feeling fear. "Is that a threat?"

Mari grinned. "You think I'm going to kill you?" She pushed Selene against the wall, albeit gently. Selene could feel Mari's breath on her face. "With them out there, I don't need to. If you don't get away, or if you don't have an arsenal and a group ready to help, they _will_ get to you." Selene avoided eye contact with Mari as she seemed to lean in even closer. "When they find you, they'll fight for you. They'll bite into you. They'll use their claws and scoop out your intestines and feast at it. They'll take chunks out of your skin. They'll leave you alive for five minutes in an intense agony you probably can't imagine." Mari still held on to Selene, but pulled away with a satisfied grin. "And once they're done you won't even get the peace of death. You'll be one of them. And the fate they've given you, that horrible fate, will be the fate you'll give so many others. Do you really want that?"

Selene thought about her life. About the people she wanted to protect. She really didn't want that.

"Fine," she said angrily. "I'll come."

Mari smiled. Selene saw Jermaine and Wendy give each other a very particular glance behind Mari's shoulder.

"First thing is first, how do you plan to get past those things?" Jermaine finally continued once the dust was settled.

"It's easy as pie," Mari slipped the rifle on her back over her shoulder and then held it, aiming it carefully. "I'm sure you've figured out by now that the creepers are attracted by noise, no?"

"Yeah…" Jermaine paused.

"Well, I'll show you how to make a great escape," Mari pulled the trigger, a silent bullet slinging out and smashing the window of a dormant car. Immediately alarms blazed. The zombies around the streets changed direction: instead of wandering around aimlessly, they turned towards the noise. Together, in a big horde, they stumbled towards the car as if it were living.

Selene couldn't help but be horrified. It had been the first time she'd seen so many. They all attacked back at the airport, but she'd been tucked away in the back of a shop. Now she saw them all. Most of them were her father's neighbours, now they were dead creatures that walked the streets and mindlessly followed any noise source in the hope for innocent flesh. In a way, she felt kind of sorry just looking at them. With their empty eyes, despairing moans and aimless walk they appeared confused. Hopeless, even.

Selene looked amongst the crowd for familiar faces. Thankfully, she didn't see her father amongst them. But that didn't mean they hadn't gotten him. She had to somehow get through the crowd of monsters, and when congregated around the blazing car they still filled up a large portion of the road. Some of them had also shown a lack of interest in the car alarms and wandered around aimlessly.

"Fuck," Oscar leaned on the balcony railings, watching the suburban nightmare unfold. "That's the best we can do?"

"I'm not the fucking Fairy Godmother," Mari rolled her eyes, looking pissed off herself. She slipped out numerous guns from a belt, handing some to Oscar and Wendy. She saw Jermaine holding his own gun and, after a second of thought, offered him a hunting knife. She gave Selene a very stern glare before handing Selene her own gun. "It's enough to escape."

It felt so much heavier than it looked. Selene felt kind of scared of it. Having spent a few years in the U.S, she'd known it had a much heavier gun culture than the U.K – and she hadn't adjusted to it.

"There's more to guns than just aiming and firing," Mari walked across the balcony, the four following behind her. "But for now all you need to know is that you just have to aim and fire. Ignore the pain."

Selene had a bad feeling about this. The only other person who probably had experience with guns was Jermaine, and even then she wasn't totally sure. Together they descended the metallic stairs and Mari took initiative, as expected: the few lone walkers that spotted her immediately turned, and she took them out one by one before they even get to her.

"Follow me!" She shouted, beginning to run. A walker almost got to her, but she removed a knife from her belt and dug it into the thing's skull in a split second. As it slumped down Selene also began to run, thankful that she and Wendy had ditched the high heels.

Because of the gunshots, more and more monsters had forgotten the car alarm noise and had started to notice that there was prey running right in front of them. They turned, desperately rushing towards the group of five. Mari led them down another corner and rushed past her dad's open garage. Selene only cast a glance behind her and saw that most of the walkers were after them by this point.

Wendy and Oscar ran at a similar pace to Selene, Jermaine and Mari were well ahead. Selene shrieked as she saw a zombie in her peripheral vision, clutching the gun with both hands and turning and firing. The force of the gun hurt her shoulders and elbows, but at least it hadn't gotten to her – the force of the bullet blasted it backwards, though it was still alive despite being hit right in the heart.

Selene ran, horrified.

"Did you see that?" She shouted at Wendy, watching Mari and Jermaine turn a corner, probably into safety.

"Good shot!" Wendy said hurriedly, turning the corner and looking shocked at the amount of monsters that followed them.

Through a patch of grass there was another, more empty street. Mari and Jermaine slipped into a van desperately. "No, I mean I shot in right in the chest and somehow it's still-" Selene paused when she realised something. Horror struck her and she tried not to have a panic attack. Oscar was gone.

She knew she'd die if she ran back to help him. He'd probably fallen or got trapped or something. And because of it he was dead. She turned to run, desperately wanting to help her brother. Wendy, however, knew better and grabbed Selene's arm, forcefully dragging her along as she screamed Oscar's name until it felt like her throat bled.

What had she done?

* * *

Oscar touched his hair, feeling that it was sticky with blood. All he saw was the pavement in front of him. He'd never considered himself particularly clumsy. That was a really bad time to fall.

He turned and almost screamed as a stray walker crawled towards his foot. He immediately kicked it forward, watching the thing get bolted away. Finally remembering his gun, he aimed it towards the walker and clumsily shot it. Bits of brain sprayed across the pavement as it rolled over slightly, the movement it had ceasing and it was finally the corpse it was supposed to be.

And yet there were more. They seemed to come in waves, each getting thicker with the other. It seemed like the monsters who'd been interested in the detour had realised that their friends had discovered something much more substantial. Oscar pointed his gun at them each as they approached him, firing off clumsily and trying to shoot at the same time.

 _Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang._

The shots all happened very quickly and consecutively after one another. Some would kill the walkers; some would knock them onto the floor but could do little else. Oscar stumbled back, turning around and realising that he was surrounded. They'd trapped him. He was dead.

 _Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang._

These shots were much louder. And judging by the fact that corpses seemed to fall at Oscar's feet very quickly, they were shot by somebody who was much more experienced with guns. A walker grabbed Oscar's arm and was ready to take a bite. Still fighting desperately, he shoved it away as its head was crushed by the force of a swinging cane.

Oscar was looking at an aged man with serious features. He was balding. He was the man Wendy had seen earlier.

"Into the garage," he snapped. Oscar didn't know if he sounded angry or not. He turned, aiming his shotgun at the animated corpse of a teenager and killing it quickly. Oscar rushed towards his father's garage and after doing a very quick clear-out the old man rushed indoors after Oscar. As soon as he was inside Oscar rushed to what he presumed was the button that closed the garage door and pressed it.

A light went on over their head. Oscar grimly imagined it was like a fridge light for the undead. He desperately reached around the wall for anything, eventually presuming something that put the garage door into motion: it began to descend in an excruciatingly slow manner. Barely keeping a calm head, Oscar rushed next to the old man and held out his gun. Together they shakily managed to keep the undead at bay. The old man had a sharp (though not perfect) aim. Oscar's was a lot more shaky, but having two gunmen made the process of not getting devoured a hell of a lot easier.

And then the older man ran out of bullets.

"Darn," he desperately searched around his pockets for ammo as one of the undead got extremely close. Oscar tried to shoot its head, and managed to hit its shoulders, stomach and chest a few times. That didn't deter it; it moved closer, hungrily swiping at Oscar as the garage door close on its head.

The thing's skull caved in immediately, and the thing dropped under the floor, deterring the garage door while the emergency functions kicked in. Just as the older man had reloaded his gun and blasted two walkers in the space of five seconds, Oscar kicked the corpse away and the garage door sealed the undead out.

The sound of the walkers collectively barging and scratching against the garage door made Oscar feel uneasy, though he was somewhat sure that it would hold. For now.

"Close shave," the eldest man stumbled around the garage, quite blatantly tired out. Oscar guessed being sixty-five and trying to be an action hero was pretty difficult. "I'm guessing this garage doesn't lead into any rooms…"

"No," Oscar frowned. "It's my dad's. It's under the apartment."

"Mm. I see," the elder man scratched his chin contemplatively. "Well, I'm Joseph. But you can call me Joe." He approached Oscar, holding out his hand. Oscar grabbed his arm tentatively, almost shocked with the firmness of Joe's handshake. "Has anybody told you that you really need to comb your hair?"

* * *

Jaime was at the wheel of the van as everybody had bundled in. No walkers seemed to have followed them; they were all much more interested in somebody else. Jaime's gut somersaulted when he realised just what they were probably after when he realised Joe had a prolonged absence and one of the new arrivals was bawling. But as long as there weren't any after him he couldn't complain.

"My brother – no!" She fought in an African American man's arms, much too weak to get out of his grip. Her face was like a rocky edge; the tears pouring from her was the waterfall that obscured it. " _I need to find my brother! He's dead!_ " Jaime felt guilty as she covered her face with her hands and sobbed profusely. This wasn't the ideal way of meeting new strangers. "He's dead and it's all my fault…"

"Shut up!" Mari hissed. Jaime had already figured out that sympathy wasn't Mari's biggest strength. She lacked the tact and manners Jaime had. She sat in the passenger's seat, looking at the three new arrivals in the back. "Joe was out there just in case something like that happened. Joe would have rescued him by now."

"Who?" Selene sobbed, hope dawning on her face. She thrashed in the African-American's arms again. "Who is Joe? Why aren't they here?"

Mari cleared her throat.

"Well, I can't exactly answer that…" The telltale signs of Selene having another breakdown were immediately apparent, so Mari tried to douse the flames: "Look, they're probably alive. There's probably just some kind of… glitch."

"So what do we do?" Selene said, determined.

"We wait."

"What? My brother is out there with things trying to eat his brains and you're just telling me to _wait_?"

"If you want to live, I fucking advise it," Mari snarled.

Jaime turned around so nobody could see his expression. Then he rolled his eyes. Since fleeing New York and meeting with a new group of survivors he'd just been the quiet, reliable one in the group. It was such a contrast to being a CEO of his father's company and being adored by all. Now he wasn't at the centre of attention, which would serve him well. Being the centre of attention was something he really didn't want right now.

It meant he'd avoid all this drama. Jaime had always been talented with words – if he was involved in some kind of drama, he'd be able to weed himself out, but he'd saved himself the effort by sitting in the driver's seat and waiting for people to die, live, have their own problems away from him. All that was on his mind was getting back to his wife and kid.

* * *

"I gave up smoking," Joseph told Oscar as he sat on the hood of a car Oscar had apparently stolen earlier. He was still out of breath and his old bones ached. Maybe Maige's jokes about him being an old man that pushed over his weight _did_ have an element of truth to them. "I wanted to see my grandchildren be born. So I gave it all up. I'm not against a whiskey now and then… So, what's your story?"

Oscar glanced at Joseph like he was deluded. He'd kind of been talking to himself for the past ten minutes.

"It's awful rude to not answer your elders, young man," Joseph told Oscar. Oscar had been looking around for something, though he wasn't sure which, and Joseph doubted Oscar would find it. "I thought you British were supposed to be polite."

"I don't have a story," Oscar said brusquely, grabbing a tin of spray paint from a shelf and dropping it.

"Well, do you smoke or drink? I did, when I was your age," Joseph smiled. Oscar glanced at him sceptically. "Why you looking at me like that? I was a bad boy. I was popular with the ladies."

"Everybody drinks," Oscar tried to make his tone less tart than it already was. "And since the Jurassic period people have moved on from tobacco. It's all about the weed."

"You remind me of someone," Joseph said, thinking of his son.

Oscar gave up his search, standing up and trying to hide his frustration. The background noise of walkers trying to invade the garage was still audible, and it seemed to affect Oscar much more than Joseph.

"Are you not going to try and get us out of here?"

"I found that patience is a virtue, and nothing passes the time quite like a story."

Oscar shrugged. "I don't have much of a story. I'm sure yours is much more interesting."

"Well, I like to think I'm interesting," Joseph gave Oscar a rare, genuine smile. He kind of liked the kid. He wanted to slap him across the cheek and teach him a thousand well needed lessons, but he liked him. "But come on, why don't you tell me about yourself? We're stranded alone in a stranger's garage right by a stolen car. We have nothing better to do."

Oscar paused.

"My mum was a teacher," he said, pacing around. "My dad was a mechanic, hence all the tools," Oscar glanced around the cluttered garage. "I knew they once had a happy marriage but… I never remembered it being that way. When I was like nine my dad met another woman and left my mum."

"For the land of the free?"

"No, he left _that_ woman for the land of the free. I don't know much about my step mum except that she lives here and she is an architect."

"Not my place to judge without knowing them, but your father sounds like a bit of a scoundrel." Joseph chuckled.

"You're telling me," Oscar mumbled, slumping on the hood of the car next to Joseph. "I guess it was only natural that I'd turn into a scoundrel too, no matter how much my mum tried to stop me. I wasn't even that bad. The worst I ever did was steal a car for shits and giggles-"

"Language."

"For the banter," Oscar corrected himself, smirking at Joseph's confused expression. Looked like being around Americans _would_ be a problem "Just for fun. And I drank a lot. And smoked pot a lot. And was an average at best student," Oscar shrugged. "I guess no matter what I did I was bound to look crap in comparison to my sister. She was beautiful. Popular. A star student. She got accepted into Cornell University."

"She must be a real brainer," Joe smiled. "My daughter, Maige, was pretty smart too... But we didn't have the money to send her to college."

"I doubt I'd have had the grades to go to University," Oscar sighed. "I'm just a big screw up."

"We always have time to make up for our mistakes," Joe patted Oscar on the back. "You just need to take responsibility for your own actions and step up to the job and let the people close to you know that they mean something to you. And don't be savin' it for later. Do it now. I've got so many regrets in my sixty-five years. Wish I fixed them when I was young and when things were easier to fix."

"Maybe now is the perfect opportunity to fix things," Oscar smiled. "End of the world and all."

"Well I will if you do. Shake on it?"

Oscar grabbed Joe's hand, shaking it more firmly; the way Joe liked it.

"So, anything else to your story?"

"No. Just that my mum pressured me to visit my dad after my sister reconnected with him. I arrive here just in time for this shitstorm…" Oscar shrugged. He was still kind of blasé about the whole apocalypse deal. He found himself terrified at the prospect that his mum and friends were dead, but he couldn't linger on that too much. Wanting to distract himself, Oscar turned to Joe. "Now it's your turn to bore me," Oscar said.

"Well once upon a time, in the Jurassic period," Joe glanced at Oscar in a very austere manner, relishing Oscar's embarrassed expression and blush. "I was born. And life was a lot different for teens in my generation. We did to what we were told, there was no saying no to an adult!" Joe chuckled. "And we had to work as much as the adults. I helped my father out; I handled the livestock. It was gruelling even by the standards of my generation, because I had to work all the time. There wasn't even the opportunity to go to school for me. I felt like there was more to life than constantly being stuck on this isolated farm in Kansas."

"So you packed up for New York?" Oscar smiled. Joseph only smirked in response and Oscar perked up a little bit. "You ran away?"

"I saved money up. I didn't _plan_ to run away. I just wanted to go to North Carolina where there was some opportunity. My pops didn't like it. And for the first time in my life that didn't stop me."

"Rebel," Oscar sniggered.

"And I never regretted it. Not for a second. It was the sixties, and opportunity was everywhere. I started my own laundromat business," Joseph smiled. "And it earned me enough bucks to enjoy life. But the sixties wasn't a good time. It wasn't all hippies and The Beatles, y'know?" He shook his head. "There was a lot of racial tension then. People on all sides were angry about it. You could almost smell the anger."

"Like Martin Luther King?" Oscar said – that was all he really knew about the civil rights movement.

"It was darker than that, it wasn't just some messiah coming along to rescue the negroes. When the darkies asked for their rights, racists made sure the backlash hit them ten times harder. My business was burned down because I would serve black people. A negro who I was good friends with, Chris, was racially attacked. He was shot in the back. Didn't even make it to the hospital."

That kind of killed the mood. Joseph sighed, smiling at an awkward looking Oscar.

"Having no money never stopped me. I found more work. Never high paying, but I persevered. I was a shoe shiner and I raised enough to move to Ohio. And then I met Fiona at a bar I worked at. She was of a higher social status than I was… And she was so bright, gentle and beautiful. It was love at first sight."

"You married her?" Oscar asked.

Joseph nodded, smiling at all the good memories he had with Fiona. "You bet your bottom dollar I did. I thought she wouldn't be interested in me, but I had a lot going for me when I was younger," he smirked with some self-satisfaction. "I wanted to start another business. I had a knack for running things my own way. So we moved to Illinois after our honeymoon. We started our business. We had two beautiful children. And then things really screwed up."

"How badly?"

"When we moved to New York after I obtained a construction license and started a business there, we felt like the perfect family. And then there were problems with my son. Problems I don't really want to get into," Joe told Oscar before the boy could inquire further. "So he ran away. He walked out the door and I've never seen him face-to-face since."

"Maybe it runs in the family," Oscar said, prompting a wistful smile from Joe.

"I worry it does, son. I worry it does…" He shrugged. "My successful business didn't become successful enough, because the stress of having her son abandon her gave Fiona cancer. I swear it did. I had to pay her bills, and sometimes Ronnie would need to be bailed out in some state far away from home. I eventually gave up on my son. And I think I had good reason too, but when I told him to never contact me again… I regret it…" Joe's eyes were filled with sadness, faced towards the floor. The monsters outside had stopped banging on the garage door, though were still heard slugging around outside. "My daughter, Maige, had to give up on her dreams of college. We just didn't have the money. Eventually Fiona died. And Maige and I were left in the Big Apple, just trying to pick ourselves back up again." He turned to Oscar, giving him a serious glance. "And we never did."

"I'm really sorry to hear that…" Oscar didn't quite know what to say. "I really am."

"All I'm saying is appreciate what you have before it's too late. And learn to forgive," Joe smiled. "They were my two big mistakes. Maybe when you're an old man like me you'll know not to make them."

"Maybe…" Oscar's mind was set on Joseph's story. He'd had lifelong problems with his father and his son. It was sad, really. And the sad thing was Oscar kind of saw himself in Joseph, and Joseph's son. Just somebody who felt the need to run away from his problems. "We need to get out of here, anyway. We need to get you back to your daughter, no?"

"Do you have any ideas?" Joe asked Oscar calmly. "Because I can't think of anymore stories, and I think time is running out."

Oscar opened the door to the stolen car, smiling. "I think I have an idea."

* * *

Mari made her way back into the street with two pistols in hand. She couldn't believe she was putting her life on the line for _other people_ , but if she'd have sat around and let Selene something stupid they'd have all died. Despite telling Selene otherwise there was a part of her that knew Oscar and Joe could definitely have died, considering how packed the street was. She didn't know how she felt about that.

Fortunately if anyone was equipped to survive an apocalypse it was her. Even before the apocalypse her life had been in danger consistently. She'd been trusted to catch all sorts of scumbags from different roads of life. Zombies were a lot less dangerous than drug lords.

She spun the pistols in her hands just for show before reflexively destroying the skull of two walkers that spotted her. Thankfully her guns were silenced. She needed a way to get to the kid and the old man.

She wasn't made of ammo and though she had more than enough, she knew she'd need it in the future. As the walkers noticed her and made their way towards her she removed a knife, jamming one through middle aged woman's eye socket. As it slumped to the floor she sent her foot into another monster's stomach so that it sprawled backwards. Behind the horde that made their way towards her, she could see a closed garage door. She was an observant person. She knew it had been open minutes before, which gave her a bit of hope.

She went on the retreat, quickly shooting the brains out of a few zombies and walking backwards, keeping a watchful eye on the garage door as she faced a whole horde. There was no way she could get to it.

Maybe zombies _were_ harder to handle than drug lords.

Mari looked in awe as the garage door was blasted forwards, being torn into the street as a car desperately drove out. It mowed down a small chunk of the horde, driving forwards before eventually being unable to drive any further. She couldn't see anything through the smashed windscreen, but she knew that somebody was alive and driving that thing. She squinted, only noting Oscar's blonde hair in the driver's seat.

The majority of the horde immediately lost attention, turning towards the louder noise as if they'd assumed there was more meat to bite. Mari would have to take on the twenty or so walkers that were interested in her, and then she'd help her buddies.

* * *

"Fuck," Oscar slammed his foot on the accelerator, the car uselessly revving but not moving. Joseph knew that there was probably a crawler or ten stuck under the wheel which meant that the car wasn't going to be moving anytime soon. Oscar repeatedly tried to start the car again to no avail, Joseph watched calmly as the walkers flooded around them. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Language, young man," Joseph said, turning to his side where walkers desperately tapped their hands against the glass. When he turned to the windscreen, he saw zombies crawling across the bonnet. That windscreen had already taken a hit and it wasn't going to hold for much longer.

Joe sucked in a breath, keeping his calm. He'd always been good at being resolute. When his wife had been struck with cancer he never shed a tear because he always knew there was a way out. When she died he cried, but he knew there was no point crying until it happened. And even after her death he was reassured by the knowledge she was in heaven. There was always an upside.

Joe wasn't stupid. He knew he didn't have a chance, not now. Oscar did, but only if Joe died first. Oscar kept kicking the accelerator looking completely panicked. They only had ten seconds – maybe fifteen if they were lucky.

He shoved his shotgun onto Oscar's knee, his expression grave. "Go into the back. When they've got me, go out the back and get to your sister."

"What?" Oscar said. Joe hurriedly shoved Oscar towards the back of the car. The boy confusedly glanced at Joe one more time as grubby, sharp nailed hands smashed through the windscreen. Oscar blasted one of the walkers away before they bit Joe, but it was too late. Joe felt two walkers collectively bite into two chunks of his neck and he winced at the pain, barely wanting to show any weakness.

"Go out the back!" Joe shouted louder this time, blood leaking out of his lips. "Use me as bait! I've lived my life, boy! Go! Go live yours!" He gasped as both sides of the windows were broken into and monsters clawed at his hands. Blood was everywhere. In front of him, Oscar looked absolutely terrified, but Joe was eerily calm. He'd accepted that his time was up.

He'd longed to see his wife again. He smiled, knowing he finally would. He was so sad to leave Maige, so sad to not see Ronnie again. But he had no time for regrets… Not now.

Numerous hands gripped him, slowly tearing him apart. Dozens of bites were littered around his body. Unsatisfied with small chunks from his neck, the monsters greedily pulled him backwards through the windscreen. By that point he was already dead.

* * *

Mari silently finished off the last of the walkers that were focused on her. There were so many more surrounding the car. She looked absolutely horrified. She didn't know what to do. Whoever was in there had no hope.

Then suddenly the sound of shattering was heard. Mari wasn't much of a reactor, but as she watched from a distance as Joe was dragged out by the zombies, already dead, she couldn't help but wince. They were tearing him into pieces until he was a barely recognisable chunk of meat.

She bit her bottom lip. Shit. That guy had a family, and as far as Southerners went he was a decent guy. She couldn't help but feel the tiny piece of her heart that wasn't dead ache a little bit.

… But what about the other kid… Oscar?

They swarmed around the corpse, desperately eating it. She wished she knew what had happened to him because she didn't want to be consoling two families at this moment in time.

* * *

Oscar desperately opened the back seat of the car, stumbling out of it. Only a few walkers noticed him and lurched towards him, and he couldn't shoot them and attract more walkers. He crawled across the hard pavement for a second, desperately turning around and butting a few of the crawlers away with the barrel of his shotgun. If he hit them just right the blunt force would smash in their skulls, killing them.

A thousand feelings were surging through him at once, and yet all of them felt kind of obsolete. He couldn't really feel the sadness, anger or fear. Right now the only thing that coursed through his mind was _run._ Get up and run and survive. He stood up, desperately rushing away from the scene of the carnage, a few walkers lurching after him but not being quick enough to get him.

After he'd gained some distance he turned around to see that the few walkers that weren't _still_ picking the scraps of Joseph's corpse were making their way towards him. He had a clear escape, but he was blocked from getting to the place where Selene and everyone else was. His pulse raced and he hoped to god she was okay. He needed to find some kind of way to get to her.

Though the walkers were at a comfortable distance, just as he aimed the shotgun Joe had given him to one of them it slumped down. Another creep, whose intestines were already hanging from its stomach, mimicked it and slumped to the floor as blood sprayed from its head. All the zombies closest to Oscar followed the same pattern, dropping one by one like flies.

" _Hey_!" Oscar saw the noticeable signs that Mari was there: the black tank top, the bombed jacket and cargo pants were a big giveaway. She was stood atop a car, shooting any of the walkers that got close to Oscar. A few zombies turned towards her, deciding she looked much more desirable. The horde lurched away from Oscar, and slowly walked towards her as she called them: " _Shitheads! Come at me! You know you want a piece of me!_ "

Oscar stood watching in shock. Mari watched the horde slowly approach her, running her hands through her hair.

"There, run there!" She pointed down what looked like some kind of lawn that separated two buildings. "There's a van. Get there!"

Oscar took a second to process her words, and a split second afterwards he couldn't see her through the horde. He stood still for a few minutes, watching them move after her. Once he was sure he was safe, Oscar slowly made his way towards where he was instructed to go. As he crossed the road he tried not to gasp when he cast two glances at the five or six walkers that were still surrounding Joe's corpse, taking scoops of flesh and biting into it hungrily.

He couldn't see the corpse, but judging by the pints of blood that was spread across the floor and the front of the car, he didn't want to see that carnage. Trying to keep his breaths steady he made his way across the road calmly, rushing through the intersection and clutching the gun in his hand tightly.

It was quite easy to spot: a large van parked on the sidewalk in another, emptier road. Oscar shook as he made his way to the doors, taking at least twenty seconds just to wrench the door open and throw himself in there.

Two arms immediately found themselves tightly crushing Oscar's chest. Selene's dark hair was in his face; somehow, after everything, it still smelled nice and flowery. She sobbed profusely, trembling as they bundled in the back of the van. It was a little bit crowded in the back.

"Where is Joe?" A man with sharp features and a handsome face turned towards Oscar. "And Mari?"

"I don't know where Mari is," Oscar said, the sadness of Joe's death hitting him. He didn't know Joe well, but he had a family… he had a life… and seeing the man get torn apart before him would certainly give Oscar nightmares for years to come. "Joe is… Well…" He didn't say anything, but he think everybody else got the picture.

Nobody needed to be told anything further. There was a mournful silence. Jaime only nodded, a sad glance in his eyes.

"I see…" Jaime paused. "Lets just hope Mari makes it back in the next ten minutes."

"Ten minutes?" Wendy sounded offended. "We need to give her more time than that."

"If she's not back in ten minutes, she could be dead," Jaime said coolly. He nervously drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "Joe is already dead. We can't just wait around like food and ask the zombies to eat us for one girl."

"We can't just abandon her," Wendy said, somewhat hopelessly. "What if she's alive and we just leave her here, stranded?"

Selene and Jermaine didn't say anything. Jermaine was silent and somewhat stunned. Selene was just holding Oscar close.

"She's right," Oscar said. "She saved my life. We can't just leave her, that's fucked up-"

The door opened and Mari slipped into the passengers seat, holding a few backpacks. She gave them all confident smiles as if an old man hadn't just been killed in front of her.

"What's fucked up?" She said somewhat chirpily.

Jaime gave Oscar a pleading look.

"Nothing," Oscar immediately responded, which in turn prompted a glare from Wendy. Looked like you couldn't please anyone. "Just Joe is dead… I thought there was a chance that you…"

"I'm fine," Mari opened the glove compartment, taking out a few CD's and smiling. "I didn't even need to waste a bullet." She glanced at the CD case she was holding. "Oh, Culture Club? Awesome. Karma Chameleon is a jam." She glanced at Jamie and smiled politely. "Lets get home before anything even more fucked up happens. We've got enough supplies and I'm done with fighting the undead."

Jaime started the car, turning it smoothly onto the street. Mari would give him instructions and he'd follow them, passing multiple streets before twisting a corner onto a large, abandoned bridge that led onto the highway. As Jaime and Mari conversed, nobody else said a word.

The car was just filled with mourning and sadness. It reeked of Joe's death, and the fact Mari was happy to pretend that nothing had happened made the smell even worse. And then there were other things. Oscar knew Selene wasn't going to say anything, but she'd hoped to be reunited with her father. Her father had been missing for a week, the street he lived on was crawling with the dead and she was being taken further away than she'd hoped.

This wasn't going to be easy…

* * *

 **It really isn't going to be easy. Hopefully the death of one of the main cast has made it apparent that anybody can die at any time really, so yeah, buckle your seatbelts xD**

 **Also, thank you for the reviews! They're always much appreciated :)**


	5. Cooperate

_Let love clasp grief lest both be drown'd,_

 _Let darkness keep her raven gloss:_

 _Ah, sweeter to be drunk with loss,_

 _To dance with death, to beat the ground_

* * *

 _Day 7_

* * *

As the cheesy eighties pop was audible in the distance, Jermaine stared out of the window aimlessly, watching freeways and bridges pass by. Nobody had said a word since they departed.

Jermaine didn't know what to say or do. He was usually the one in control, but Mari seemed a lot better at playing the leader. She feigned chirpiness, sometimes making small talk with a sullen Jaime. Selene would stroke her brother's hair, Oscar would look in the distance despairingly and Wendy would occasionally burst into tears – people usually ignored the theatrics. It was like they wanted to pretend that a man had died and that all of them had narrowly avoided death themselves.

He didn't even know the person who had died, but it still felt tragic and painful. Mari and Jaime knew that person and Oscar _watched_ said person die. It was all shades of fucked up. Jermaine had already seen his fair share of death, but whenever it happened again it was never made easier. He wished he could turn off a button and not care or not be affected, but he was.

"How far from camp now?" Jermaine decided to break the silence. Nobody even turned to acknowledge him bar Mari.

"Ten minutes," she smiled. "We all got our supplies and food?"

There was an unenthusiastic murmur of affirmation.

When they got to camp Jaime swerved off the road into what seemed like a large field which was either surrounded by forest or highway. The camp was located right by a large, metallic bridge. When Jermaine turned to observe the camp he could already see the telltale signs of human life – there were a few cars parked around, tents lifted and smoke rising from fire. Despite all the bullshit that had happened, Jermaine smiled. It was nice to see some form of human life out there, instead of the same old emptiness.

Jaime braked very abruptly, turning the engine of the car off. There was a moment of silence and everybody looked at each other. Selene looked particularly upset. Jermaine felt bad for the girl – he guessed she wanted to see her father more than anything, the same way Jermaine wanted to see his kids. Poor girl.

Jermaine saw a few people rushing up to the car expectantly, nervous and wide eyed. Looked like this camp was moderately used to the fact that people had died. He wondered if anyone was going to mention the dead old man… Did he have family here?

Jaime immediately rushed to a kind looking woman and a girl who couldn't be more than six. She wore pig tails and looked extremely grateful to see her dad.

"Daddy!" He rushed up to her, picking her up and spinning her around. She laughed with mirth at his very contact and pushed her up to his chest – his wife also joined in on the hug.

Behind them another girl was walking up to camp, holding a container. She was looking around desperately for something. Jermaine waited in the car and immediately had a bad feeling about this. She was looking for the dead guy, wasn't she? Beside him, Oscar sighed and made his way out of the car. Mari also seemed hesitant to leave.

"Where's my poppa?" The girl said, the wind carrying her tied up hair. She looked around confused, as if she had been positive he'd get home.

"Look," it was the gentlest he'd heard Mari talk, she walked up to the girl and put an arm around her shoulder, leading her away from the rest of the camp. Oscar, Selene and Wendy stood by Jermaine as they watched Mari take the girl away. They couldn't hear what Mari said, but the girl obviously didn't take it well. When she heard the news she looked at Mari confusedly, but Mari continued saying something. Eventually she made a scream that all of them could hear. The howl made Jermaine feel awful. The girl collapsed to her knees and Mari desperately tried and failed to console her.

"That was his daughter," Oscar said emptily. Everybody glanced at Oscar as if they couldn't quite believe it. Too often people were losing families, and now they'd finally witnessed it first hand. Nobody wanted to say it, but any one of their relatives could be dead…

"Lets just ignore it," Selene said. In the background, like a white noise, screams of despair were still heard. "I guess we need to get used to the camp, or something." She turned around and strode off.

* * *

Ellie and Adam sat on a log, peeling potatoes (and keeping the peelings – you couldn't be picky with what you ate nowadays) and talking cordially. They'd been in their own little bubble, and stayed away from the dramas of group life. They were nice enough people and didn't stick their nose in anyone's business, though when Maige broke down crying and Joseph didn't return they immediately knew what that meant. Ellie dropped the potato she was holding, glancing at the scene wearily. Mari lead a muddy, sobbing Maige into a tent. They both went inside and didn't seem to emerge.

"I can't believe people are dying," Ellie said quietly to Adam. They'd been together for a long time – she couldn't imagine life without him. Whatever happened, at least they had each other. "People are dying and we're just here peeling potatoes."

"At least we're okay," Adam smiled emptily, picking up Ellie's potato. "Maige said not to waste any of the food."

"I don't think Maige cares right now," Ellie said gloomily. When she perked up she saw strange faces: a dark haired girl, a kind faced Asian woman, a very burly African American guy and a blonde haired teenager. "Are they newcomers?"

"I think so," Adam paused, scratching the back of his head. "Guess there's safety in numbers…"

"Maybe we should say hello to them," they were standing around like lost lambs. Ellie stood up, brushing her jeans off. "They look like they don't know what the hell to do. I think Maige will give them jobs when she's…" Ellie paused, not wanting to continue that sentence. "I guess they deserve to be shown around a little, you know? And they need to meet new people."

Adam didn't want to tell Ellie that he was too shy to talk to the newcomers. She was a social butterfly compared to him, and though she loved him the way he was she had to admit life would've been easier if he was a little less high maintenance. Still, she loved his imperfections. She loved _him_. That, and her cheery disposition, meant that she was able to act like a beacon of hope when there was realistically so little of the stuff.

"I'll just do the cooking chores," Adam smiled.

"Oh, alright," Ellie didn't want to call him out on his avoidant personality, and she didn't want to disrespect his boundaries. She mentally prepared herself as she moved over to the newcomers, trudging past the grass close to Mari's van. They looked at her like she was a stranger, which was kind of intimidating, considering all of them (despite the Asian girl) had a height advantage on her.

"Hey, I'm guessing you're new here," Ellie smiled.

"No shit," Jermaine said.

"Ignore him," Wendy smiled. "He's a grump." Wendy stretched out her hand. "I'm Wendy, and yeah, we're new. We must look like freaks just hanging around the outskirts of the camp, it's just we came back and Mari had to deal with…" Wendy paused awkwardly, and Ellie just nodded. She understood that people wouldn't really want to talk about the emotional baggage everyone was dealing with right now.

"Well, I'll show you around the camp," Ellie smiled at them all, leading them close to the fire where Adam was sitting and peeling potatoes. She spoke as she walked. "We're nobody special, just a bunch of survivors who all met up. The most recent addition to the group is Eli, you'll talk to him later." Ellie stopped in front of Adam and turned to everybody. "This is Adam. He's my boyfriend."

Adam just smiled awkwardly. He really didn't want to talk to the new arrivals, but he really didn't want to be rude and _not_ talk to the new arrivals. Considering people were struggling to eat, he thought he'd be over this social interaction bullshit. Nope.

"Everybody here has a job, Maige picks it. Maige and Mari are kind of the leaders of the group," she explained, leading them away from the fireplace and towards the group of dull tents which had been set up. "Adam and I mostly cook. There are a few people who help out, but I'll tell you who they are when we meet them. We take turns to do our chores, like a household… A big, dysfunctional household."

"How many are there?" Oscar asked.

Ellie paused, thinking. "Well… There were sixteen… Now there's nineteen," she looked saddened at the thought that one of the group had died. "By the way, don't think that death is super common. We've been here for a while now and nobody else had died."

"How long have you dealt with this?" Jermaine inquired

Ellie blushed. "Well, um… Um… Between three and five days… depending on who you're referring to. Adam and I met up with some of these guys about four days ago." Everybody stopped walking for a second while the most awkward pause in history ensued. If it wasn't death related, it would've been positively hilarious. Ellie forced a smile. "But hopefully that was a slight blip on the radar… We'll pull together."

Jermaine tried to refrain from being aggressive – he failed. And considering he was a foot taller than Ellie, he was very intimidating as he sized her up.

"We can't afford slight blips when our lives are on the fucking line!"

Before Wendy interjected, Ellie decided she could fight her own battles. "I know, you're not the only one in danger. I'm scared as hell too. But we have to pull together if we want to survive," the firmness in her tone was soft again. "Okay?"

Jermaine frowned.

"Well, this is Eleanor and Melanie," Ellie opened their tent slightly, revealing two girls who were huddled inside. They were both Filipino and seemed to be having a hushed conversation in their native language. "Hey guys," Ellie smiled. Eleanor, the chubbier of the sisters, scrutinised Ellie before forcing a smile, whereas Melanie avoided eye contact altogether. "These are our new additions."

"Hey," Eleanor smiled politely. Feeling like she was interfering, Ellie left the tent and closed it over. As they paced to the next tent, Ellie spoke:

"They seem to keep themselves to themselves," she explained. "Eleanor is the nicer one, but she's also the one you don't want to annoy. She's usually on scavenge duty with Joe, Mari and Jaime-"

"Scavenger duty?"

"Yeah, they go out into more populated areas to get food and stuff, that's what everyone was doing when they bumped into you guys," Ellie smiled at them, stopping outside another tent. "Three go at once. It was Eleanor, Mari, Joe and Jaime…" The awkwardness set in again. "Guess we'll need another scavenger. Nobody really wants to do that. It's the most dangerous job. I just peel and boil stuff."

"Her sister was weird," Oscar commented honestly.

"She's very quiet, keeps herself to herself, she works wish me and Adam but she doesn't talk unless it's to ask for something or to ask where her sister is," Ellie shrugged. "I feel like her English may not be good."

Jermaine rolled his eyes.

"This is why we shouldn't have illegal aliens coming into this country," he sighed. Wendy glared at him.

"Please, tell me how Native American you are," she said.

"My ancestors were _forced_ here."

"My ancestors were forced into camps after Pearl Harbour, and Jim Crowe didn't do us much good either, spare me the lecture," Wendy snarled.

"Is this really the time to argue about racial stuff?" Selene asked tentatively.

Thankfully, the tension was broken when a little girl rushed out of the tent. She had dark hair and a charismatic, adorable smile. Even Jermaine smiled down at her as she looked up at the towering grown-ups. After scrutinising all of them slowly, she spoke out loud:

"My name is Hermione Granger," she smiled, doing her attempt at a British accent.

"Oh, how is Hogwarts?" Jermaine said to her.

'Hermione' put her fingers to her lips. "Be quiet! The muggles can't know!"

Before anybody could talk someone called firmly after the little girl. A tall, fresh-faced woman with full lips observed all of them. Jermaine noted how she looked quite similar to the younger girl. He automatically guessed that she was the young girl's mother. It made him miss his own kids.

"Sierra, come on, you're supposed to be in the tent before it gets dark," she said firmly.

"Bye bye, Sierra," Ellie smiled warmly at Sierra, who waved before she bundled back into the tent.

"I'm sorry about that," the young girl's mother said, looking around worriedly as if she was expecting something to be off. "She's very explorative… She loves talking to strangers. I guess with everything going on it's pretty important to tell her not to do that," Jermaine wondered why Ilene looked so nervous. She was pulling on the cuffs of her shirt, avoiding all eye contact. "It's nice to see you guys," she glanced briefly at the newcomers. "Jaime told me all about you." She gave a very hurried smile before she followed her daughter back into the tent.

"Someone was very anti-social," Oscar said.

"Not many people in this place have been willing to talk," Ellie said, somewhat dejected. "Adam is the same, he just wants to keep himself to himself. Please don't take it personally."

"I won't," Selene said honestly. "I get it."

Ellie glanced at her briefly, before turning around. They'd bumped into a newcomer; a girl who wore broken glasses and was relatively short. She gave the newcomers all very brief smiles. Compared to everybody else they'd been introduced, Jermaine got the feeling that Alyssa was much nicer. Meeting somebody nice was definitely good.

"Oh, hey Alyssa," Ellie smiled. "How is babysitting duty?" She turned to the others. "This is Alyssa. She's really nice. Her job is looking after the children."

"Hey Alyssa," the girls said in unison while Oscar and Jermaine acknowledged her with a simple look.

"Hey Ellie and newcomers," she looked them up and down. "I heard that there were newcomers, I wanted to check them out."

"What did you hear?" Jermaine said tentatively.

Alyssa shrugged. "Just that there were newcomers who looked like they hadn't spent a day outdoors in a while," Ellie walked along, gesturing for them to all walk with her to the next set of tents. They skipped one of the tents, and continued walking. "So what have you guys been doing in the past week? It's been rough, right?"

"You can say that again," Wendy sighed. "We just barricaded ourselves into an apartment."

"Nice," Alyssa frowned. "I know we don't look as safe, but we are. We have food, water, weapons and some people who really need to know how to use said weapons. So yeah, don't worry about it." She smiled at all of them. "People here don't talk much, but if you want help I'm happy to give it."

"It must be nice to have another teen around, right, Oscar?" Selene smiled at her brother, who shrugged.

"Have they met everyone? Have they been given duties?"

"No duties, not just yet," Ellie said. "And they've met the Mott family, the Filipino sisters, me, you, Adam. Obviously they met Mari because she was out scavenging. I guess that leaves…"

"Me," a kind yet somewhat mysterious voice said from behind them all. They all jumped immediately at the source, finding themselves facing a stern faced Asian boy who must've been no older than twenty-five. He was tall, almost eye-to-eye with Jermaine, and particularly skinny. "I'm Han."

"Oh, hey Han," Alyssa smiled brightly at him, as if she were particularly happy to see him. "This is Han. He's another loner."

"I'm not a loner," Han protested. "I just think people talk too much."

Alyssa grabbed his hand. "Considering you don't talk much, how about you take this kind lady to her tent and bid her goodnight. With the whole dead walking around kind of deal, it helps to have somebody escort me around." She smirked, obviously joking, though Han's joke detector was certainly defunct – to say the least.

"Um, okay," he said, walking off. Alyssa raised her eyebrows at the group and walked off after them. Ellie sniggered.

"He really _doesn't_ talk much," Ellie told them all, walking again. Jermaine watched the two young adults walk in the distance. "He's on cook duty with me and Adam. He's nice enough. He's not from New York; he only came here a couple of years ago for college. I think like everybody else he just wants to find his family again." She sighed, continuing walking. "I guess you've almost met everyone. By this point you just need to meet the kids," she paused. "And Eli, but I don't know if we'll even see him. He's never really at his tent, he doesn't sleep much and you just don't really see him around," she glanced around as if she half expected him to be there. "He makes Han look like a social butterfly."

Jermaine was left quite curious about him. Instead of checking out the other empty individual tents they returned back to the campfire. Adam was done with his duties, and he was sitting with Mari, who was scolding two kids for running around by the fireplace. Seeing that Mari was there, Ellie seemed much more eager to return. She hurried to the campfire, smiling at each of the individual kids and then glancing back at the other four.

"I believe you've met these lovely people," Ellie smiled at Mari, sitting down next to Adam. She kissed his cheek affectionately and he blushed a little, probably not used to public displays of affection. Jermaine felt Ellie and Adam could be trusted more than the others; they seemed sincere enough.

"Yeah," Mari smiled weakly at them all. "I'm sure you've been acquainted with everyone?"

"Everyone but Eli," Ellie said.

"He's not around very much anyway," Mari slipped on a leather jacket as it grew somewhat dark and nippy. The sky looked like an indecisive mix of light and dark blue, in the background the sun was showing tell-tale signs of going into hiding. "His duty is guarding the camp, so he's mostly around the perimeter. He seems better with a gun than most people so I don't complain that he does his job. We all need to do our job to survive."

"I don't feel like I'd be on those Discovery Channel survival shows when I spend my days cooking or peeling vegetables of a sort," Ellie said, watching the kids play tag. "Maybe you want to introduce her to the children?"

"They're kids," Mari lit a cigarette on the fireplace. She looked kind of worn out and fed up. She inhaled, her face relaxing slightly. After exhaling she spoke: "The little one is my nephew… or cousin. I've never been able to figure out which," she chuckled. "He's a little annoying, but he means well. He's just about the nicest person you'll meet around here, so bare with him. The little black girl is Chelsea. We found her as we were escaping New York City. Poor kid was separated from her parents and we knew we had to let her in the car otherwise she'd been dead zombie food."

Jermaine glanced at Chelsea. She didn't seem to playing as much as the two other boys. She'd mostly just observe, and she was also the one who was paying the most attention to the adults huddled around the fire. She ran along with the boys when they reminded her that she was one of them. Jermaine had the feeling that she wasn't one of them, though. He'd had kids of his own. She wasn't acting how most kids acted.

"She's a smart girl," Mari said to Jermaine, as if she read his thoughts.

"How was New York?" Oscar asked, curious. "I mean, when all this broke up?"

"The last place you'd want to go is New York," Mari said. "Some parts of the city still have people in them, in their tower block apartments. And I hear a lot of people have found safety in the subways. But if you get into the wrong area you'll find yourself surrounded by an army of walkers," she inhaled again.

Everybody paused.

"Who is the other kid?" Selene said. "Someone else's kid?"

"No," Ellie paused. "He stumbled across here," she looked quite sad. "He was dirty and messy and looked like a lost lamb. He was inconsolable for two days. Alyssa managed to talk to him and she discovered that he'd watched his parents get eaten right in front of him," there was a horrified pause from Oscar, Selene, Jermaine and Wendy. Wendy of all seemed the most visibly affected.

"That's awful," she said.

"Yeah, you tell me," Ellie sighed. "My duty isn't babysitting, but I speak to the kids quite a lot and keep an eye on them. He's only just started playing with the other kids, and I get the feeling that he only does it to maintain some kind of relationship with them. I guess all he has is us now," he turned to Adam, smiling. "What do you think about adoption, baby?"

Adam glanced at her seriously. "I don't think we're ready," he said, amused. "And we're definitely not in the right environment."

"A girl can get broody from time to time," she smiled, turning to Mari. "Anyway, these guys need their duties I guess-"

Mari cut her off. "I'll tell them it in a few days or something," she dropped her half smoked cigarette, crushing it with her boots. She stood up, stretching a little bit. "Sorry guys," she looked over at them all. "But I just had to tell a girl that her dad died today." Jermaine wanted to know how Maige was, but didn't find himself speaking. He just looked into the flames. "As you can imagine, I'm just exhausted. I just want to chill out for a few days." She called over to Jareck, who seemed very sad that he couldn't stay out in the night and play. After promising some kind of punishment, Jareck rushed after her and they both headed towards the tents.

Jermaine kept close to the flames while nobody talked. The only sounds that filled the air were the sound of the blowing wind, the crackling flames and the sound of crickets that formed a background song. Jermaine knew that things weren't going to be easy. Not now. But this group seemed friendly enough. If he learned to control his temper and chill, maybe something could happen, maybe they could all survive until the army took control of the country or until scientists found a way to solve this problem. He looked at the couple, who were talking quietly to each other, then to the two kids who were no longer playing but were sitting on the grass, and then to the people who he'd known for a whole week. There was an ominous feeling in his gut. God knows what was going to happen in the future, but it wasn't going to be easy.

* * *

 _Day 8_

* * *

Thankfully there had been a spare tent present, and Wendy had been made to share a tent with Oscar and Selene – which she didn't mind – and also Jermaine, which she minded very much. Selene (being empathic enough to understand that Wendy had distaste for Jermaine) purposely slept between them so that there was a level of distance. Wendy appreciated that quite a lot.

There were only two sleeping bags, too. Oscar and Wendy were the ones who slept in them for a multitude of reasons. Jermaine insisted he didn't need one, and Selene was adamant that her brother should be warm. When Wendy woke up she felt kind of weird. She may not have been wet or cold, but spending the night outdoors was something she hadn't done in a long time. She was also used to brushing her teeth or enjoying a long, hot shower in the morning, but she guessed that wasn't going to happen either. She hoped her skin and teeth didn't get too bad.

After a small amount of fuss, the four were up. They'd slept in their clothes, so only had to search for their shoes before they met their way outside. The sound of birds singing was highly audible and the morning sun made sure the dew covered grass glittered before them. Han, Ellie, Adam and Melanie – the cooks of the group – were already frying something in a pan.

"Hey," it was the first time Wendy had seen the group altogether. Maige was visibly absent, though. She smiled at everyone. "I know we've all met, but I'm Wendy."

She noticed Eli, the one who everyone said was missing all the time. He had milky skin, messy dark hair and suspicious eyes. She also noticed how lanky he was. As expected, he was relatively silent. They made awkward eye contact, which Wendy tried to pretend didn't happen. She sat down on the nearest piece of log that wasn't taken, finding herself sitting next to the quiet Filipino sister Melanie, who was desperately trying to fry eggs. She mumbled to herself angrily in her native language.

"I'm guessing it's the same protocol?" Eli spoke in a gruff voice. Looked like she'd walked in on him actually talking. "I'll do the guarding?" He picked up a gun that Wendy thought was _way_ too big, before standing up.

"You have to have breakfast, first," Mari insister. Eli shrugged.

"I'm not hungry," he turned around, walking off towards the forest. Selene awkwardly sat down after him and Mari looked at them all.

"You've taken your time," she said. "We usually get up a little bit earlier than you guys. You _have_ had it comfy, haven't you?"

Jermaine mumbled something, obviously quite defensive. Wendy wasn't going to pretend that she didn't have it good, and she felt Oscar and Selene were way too tired to protest anyway. Ignoring Jermaine, Mari carried on:

"Well, you all have jobs to do," she smiled. "Oscar, that your name?" He nodded. "You're going to be a scavenger. I think Joe would like you to take his place."

"What?" Selene looked panicked. "That's the most dangerous job!"

"He'll be fine," Mari's facial expression radiated _I cannot deal with this shit_. "Won't he, Eleanor?"

Wendy watched the older Filipino sister nod.

"He won't go every day. Three a day go out scavenging, and it would've been Joe's day off, meaning you get a day off," she stood up, removing a gun from her backpack and smiling at Mari. "Where are we going today? Downtown Buffalo?"

"I think the army is still there," Jaime was holding his daughter, who was thrashing and squealing with delight as he tickled her. He'd been quiet, but spoke when it came down to business: "We've only explored the outskirts briefly, so I'm thinking we go somewhere else. I'm guessing there'll be a good bit of food out there."

"Good plan," Mari smiled, turning to Oscar. "So do you want to join the A-Team, kid?"

Oscar paused. "Yeah. I'll do it." Selene glared at him, obviously quite unhappy.

Mari ignored her. "Selene, we decided that you can be a cook or a babysitter, depending on what you want to do."

"Babysitting," Selene said.

Ilene sniggered next to her husband. "You're with me, Alyssa and Maige, then, although naturally Maige is getting a bit of a break. And Jareck is the biggest handful I've ever come across," Adam stood up and smiled, slipping some fried eggs and bacon onto a polystyrene plate and placing it on Jaime's lap. It didn't look like much for three people, but considering he moved on to Mari and started serving her Wendy assumed that breakfast was for all three of them.

"He really is a handful," Mari agreed, turning around and gesturing to Jareck that breakfast was done. He rushed forwards, and Mari hushedly explained to all of them: "He's a smart kid, but I've kind of kept everything that's going on a secret, just so he can handle things better, you get me?" Wendy thought that kind of stupid, but kept silent while everyone nodded. "Just don't mention the dead walking around and eating people. He's a happy kid; I don't want him to lose that. And I don't want him worrying for his parents either."

"Wow, bacon!" Jareck seemed very impressed as he sat next to Mari.

"What do we say?" Mari said as he ate the bacon with his bare hands.

"Thank you," he gave a wide smile that showed off his teeth to everyone. Wendy had to stop herself from laughing. Then Jareck was silent as he ate.

"Anyway, Wendy, I was thinking you might want to join Selene, Alyssa and Ilene and Maige looking after the kids?" Mari said to Wendy, who visibly showed her distaste. Mari quickly tried to appease her: "Or you could cook with Han, Melanie, Adam and Ellie or something… I mean, you know…"

"Is this the fifties?" Wendy folded her arms together. "I can't cook ramen without burning it, and frankly children have never been my deal."

Mari sighed.

"Okay, okay," she rolled her eyes. "You just didn't look like an action girl. I'm all for girl power, if I wasn't I wouldn't be the one having to save everyone's asses," Wendy was satisfied and she smirked. Although she wasn't really an action girl… But shooting seemed a lot easier than looking after Jareck or spending the whole day sitting around and peeling vegetables. Wendy smiled when Adam served her a fried breakfast on a polystyrene plate wordlessly. "I don't know what job to give you though, we have enough scavengers…"

"Why not ask her to be a guard?" Alyssa said, jabbing into her fried egg with a plastic fork.

"Eli could use some help, but I was going to ask Jermaine," Mari smiled at Jermaine. "You look like you'd be a good guard."

"I've been a bouncer and a security guard all my life," Jermaine said. "Guarding is my skill."

"Cool, we'll get you a better gun in the armoury," Mari finished her breakfast and then looked at Jareck who was disgustingly licking fat off her palms, unaware that everybody was looking at him. Mari scowled, but said nothing.

"How did we get an armoury?" Wendy questioned.

"I just have a lot of guns and ammo," Mari avoided the question. "So are you going to be a guard or no?"

Wendy considered. Pros – she wouldn't have a bullshit job, she'd just have to walk around the outskirts of the camp and make sure that nothing happened so guarding didn't seem to be a problem. The cons were that she'd probably have to stay up at night and then there was also the small fact that she would have to work with Jermaine. She could befriend Eli. He seemed nice, and he had that mysterious thing about him that made him vaguely attractive to Wendy. But he didn't seem sociable. Or she could forget everyone completely. She decided to suck it up, and after a minute pause she nodded.

"Okay, I'll do the guarding too." She forced a smile. The thought of working with Jermaine was already killing her.

* * *

 _Day 16_

* * *

It had been over a week since arriving at the camp and Selene still felt somewhat isolated. She barely interacted with anybody except those who she worked with: Ilene and Alyssa were both very friendly to her, but they weren't her family. She only really talked to Oscar when they both weren't busy, which was becoming increasingly rare. Everybody else was either not very talkative or not very available. Wendy, who she'd kind of become friends with, would mostly be away from her on the outskirts, and when they were together Wendy would talk more to Eli, who didn't talk much to anyone else.

"Come on, Jareck," Selene said when she'd finally found him. He'd ran off and she'd finally found him on the outskirts of some kind of cornfield. "You know what I said about running off."

Jareck pouted, but then smiled. He was very immature for his age and full of energy; if he wasn't such a nice kid Selene would've ended up strangling him to death by now. Jareck held Selene's hand and allowed her to lead him closer to the camp. Sienna, Chelsea and Thomas were all sat around a circle close to Alyssa and Ilene, who were looking after them. They seemed to have been playing some kind of game.

"I don't like the game they're playing," Jareck whispered to Selene.

"No?" Selene needed him to stay put. They hadn't told the children, but the reason the children's movements were so limited was because if the children ran off and bumped into a zombie it wouldn't end very well. Looked like she needed to compromise. "If you play the game that they play I'll give you an extra piece of my bacon tonight," Selene smiled. "How about that?"

"I miss McDonalds."

Selene sighed. "So do I. I miss lattes and frappucinos and cheese," her stomach growled. At least the kind of diet she was living on would promote weight loss or something. "Just hang in there with us, okay?"

Ilene's warm eyes flitted to Selene and Jareck as they approached. Somehow still maintaining some kind of enthusiasm, Jareck rushed to the circle of children and sat down next to Chelsea. Selene felt bad for the children. The only kid who was still with their parents was Sierra. The others were orphans or were stranded with some other relative, which wasn't exactly ideal. But then again, who had their parents after this apocalypse schtick? Maige lost her father and hadn't seemed to come out of her tent in a whole week. It was difficult for everybody, but seeing children suffer seemed to particularly sting.

"What did we say about running off Jareck?" Ilene said.

Jareck rolled his eyes. Even though he was childish, Selene had learned that he didn't appreciate being talked to like a child, which everybody in the camp bar her and Mari seemed to do.

"Lets just hope Mari doesn't find out how naughty you've been when she comes back from her adventure," Ilene left it at that, before forcing a smile and looking at the other children. "Why don't we play eye spy? Isn't that a fun game?" The only child that responded was Sienna, who seemed pretty enthusiastic that eye-spy would be played. "Okay, okay, eye spy with my little eye something beginning with… c…"

"Corpse?" Chelsea said, bored. Ilene immediately glanced into Chelsea's dark eyes.

"Where did you learn that word?"

"I'm twelve, not two."

"We won't be talking about corpses…"

"You're not my mom," Chelsea said, standing up. Jareck and Thomas smirked at each other, but Ilene seemed quite displeased. "And you need to stop treating me like a baby. I don't play games that are aimed at kids half my age. I know your daughter is five," she glanced at Sierra. "But that doesn't mean that I'm five too, okay?"

"I miss my parents," Thomas said, lowly.

Alyssa patted Thomas shoulders sympathetically. "I understand, sweetie…" Thomas burst into tears and Selene felt kind of awkward. She wasn't a nasty or unempathic person, but she definitely didn't know how to respond to children… Awkward. Considering Alyssa was only eighteen, she didn't seem to know what to do either. "You just have to stay strong with us, okay?"

"Fine, fine," Ilene had obviously had enough of the demanding children. Selene had never seen her lose her cool before. She stood up and clung onto her hair, threatening to tear it out. After exhaling and being considerably calmer, she spoke slowly: "You kids can play your own games, but make sure that you're in our line of sight. I'll play eye spy with Sierra, who actually enjoys the game."

Sierra rushed into her mother's arms. Once Ilene clung her to her chest she stood up and glanced to both of the younger women, smiling kindly:

"You guys can handle the tweens, right?"

"Yeah," Alyssa smiled. _No_ , Selene thought. "We'll be fine."

"Awesome," Ilene patted Alyssa's shoulder gratefully. "I owe you everything. Remember to make sure they get a snack and a nap. When Jaime is back the cooks should be preparing dinner and then after that they all go to bed. Simple enough, no?"

She turned and walked closer to the campfire with her daughter. Selene looked after her for a second. Alyssa finally sat down on the grass, relaxing and getting comfy but maintaining a watchful eye on the children, who were still rushing around excitedly. Selene wanted to keep standing; she didn't really enjoy just lying amongst the grass. If she'd stayed in her father's apartment she wouldn't have had this problem. But then again, the camp seemed to be isolated from any of the walkers. She hadn't seen any for over a week. Maybe things were better here. Selene optimistically hoped they were better in other places, like wherever her father was.

"Ever been used to kids?" Alyssa asked Selene.

Selene watched them, her mind set on something else entirely. Even since before the apocalypse she'd been filled with anxiety. After snapping out of her daydream, she turned to Alyssa.

"Oh, no, never."

"I used to babysit for twenty to fifty dollars every Saturday, I find that they're okay if you lock down on their behaviour and offer them treats," Alyssa twirled her dark hair in her eyes.

Selene nodded.

"Do you have any family?" Selene asked. "Or did you?"

"No," Alyssa paused, obviously keen to avoid the subject. "Not really."

Selene was suddenly quite curious. She decided to avoid the topic of family, but there was _something_ about Alyssa that she was inquisitive about. "So, you're from Canada, right?" Alyssa looked at her. She wondered if she was wrong. "I mean Canadian and American accents sound similar to me but I was just wondering if you're…"

Alyssa smiled. "There's a clear difference between Canadian accents and any American accent," she said matter-of-factly. "And yeah, I'm from Toronto."

"Oh. You must've been in New York when this whole thing happened?"

"On the border," Alyssa forced a smile. She leans forwards a little. "Why, what's it to you?"

"Nothing," Selene smiled.

Alyssa gave her a silent look and then realised it was worth dropping. Selene didn't feel wholly useless; being somebody who studied law, she'd been used to scrutiny and scrutinising others. She could spot lies a mile away. Alyssa wasn't lying, but she definitely had something that she was hiding. Selene figured it wasn't worth poking into, especially if it will strain the group dynamics, but she decided that there was some suspicion worth keeping.

"I can't wait until Mari gets back and it's dinnertime," Alyssa said, trying to change the conversation eagerly. Selene gave her a questioning glance, so Alyssa explained herself: "It means we no longer have to look after the kids, and once Han has cooked dinner it means I can chill with him for a while. He's a nice guy."

"Oh," Selene giggled. "Is there something there?"

"No!" Alyssa protested. Selene rolled her eyes, prompting Alyssa to tear some grass and throw it at Selene who screamed with laughter. Alyssa was blushing a little bit. "We're _just_ friends… But-"

"There's always a but-"

"But!" Alyssa held a finger out. "I wouldn't complain if he made a move. I mean, surely he knows guys are expected to make a move, right?" Selene sniggered – she knew how complicated _boys_ could be. She missed talking like this with other girls. Wendy was sweet, but so much more complicated and anxious about everything. Selene was too, but she needed someone who could take her mind off the apocalypse deal, even if it was only brief. "Sometimes I'll be giving him all the signals. I'll be fluttering my eyelashes and blushing. Nope, he doesn't get it. He doesn't even flirt."

"Maybe he's gay."

"He wears odd socks," Alyssa said, eyeing the kids briefly as they played. "When he says no homo he means it. He's just a nerd."

"Ew," Selene said.

"I know. He's just a nerd. Not usually my type... But he's smart and sweet," Alyssa said. "I'm just glad that now we have all these problems I've been stuck with some people I like. A lot of quiet and upset people, but that's a granted. Ellie is nice, you're nice, I love Ilene and then there's Han too. Who can complain?"

"Well, there are some people I don't know much. I've barely seen Maige or Eli, but I like most people," Selene said. "Except Mari. She's just so bossy and threatening…" She didn't know if she was tripping herself up by saying that, but she trusted Alyssa to not say anything. Alyssa's lips did go thinner.

"She's done a lot to protect the people in the group," Alyssa said blankly. "I don't agree with everything she does, but she's got good intentions."

"What do you disagree with?"

"Well, she wants to let us pretend to the kids like this is some spontaneous camping holiday, not some escape from a zombie infested city," Alyssa gestured towards the kids. "But Chelsea is smart enough so she knows what's going on, Thomas saw his parents get devoured right in front of him and Jareck is happy to play dumb to keep the peace, but he knows something up." The wind carried the stray pieces of grass and the girls' hair slightly, interrupting Alyssa's pause. "The only person who will fall for it is Sierra, and she's just a toddler for god's sake."

"No, it's not working," Selene said, gesturing to the children. "Look."

Alyssa turned and gazed in Selene's direction. Thomas was faking a scream and running while Chelsea pretended to shoot Jareck, who gave a fake walk and moan. He was pretending to be one of them. He fell to the ground and the kids rushed to his body, laughing and playing. Despite their playful manner, it was the most disturbing thing Selene had seen since the infestation started.

* * *

As Jaime parked the car Mari immediately opened the door, slipping out of it. She held at least five backpacks bundled with collected supplies. Oscar was probably a better addition than Joe – not that Mari would tell Maige that. Joe was better with guns, but Joe also challenged her authority more and Oscar was much more agile. She, Jaime and Oscar all headed towards camp; the sun was on the verge of sinking and the first sprinkle of stars made their way across the crimson sky.

They approached the fireplace where Adam, Ellie and Han were serving dinner. It actually looked like something _other_ than soup. It was chicken with rice, which was actually something that Mari wouldn't mind eating.

"We also have vegetables," Ellie said to everyone as she went around the circle. "Just in case there are vegetarians…"

"Anybody who is a vegetarian right now would have to be quite stupid," Mari commented, sitting down on a log and kicking one foot over the other. "Who is a vegetarian? Raise your hand?"

Selene paused. "I was a vegetarian…" Everyone glanced at her, especially a sceptical Oscar. "I liked bacon too much…"

Mari sniggered. "Okay, can the ladies raise your hands?" All of the women raised their hands desperately as if it were proof of their womanhood. Ilene had to tell Sierra to lower hers. Mari removed pads and tampons from her bag, smirking. "Great. We raided a pharmacy today and found some _lady_ products," she glared at Oscar, who made a gagging noises. She wasn't prepared for immaturity. "We also have condoms. Just in case anyone wants to get frisky because I don't want any apocalypse babies."

Selene went somewhat pale as Mari handed out the tampons. Mari smirked at her. So Selene was a prude? She couldn't expect anything less.

"Here's your _vegetables_ and rice," Ellie walked over to Mari, smirking when she showed her a polystyrene plate with chicken and rice on it. "I'm just kidding, by the way."

"Where are the Filipinos?" Mari asked.

"Oh, still in their tent. We called them but they didn't really respond."

Mari patted a pistol on her belt. "I'll just check up on them, make sure it's all okay."

Ellie smiled. "Great. I mean, if they don't want to eat it means more chicken for the kids. They _are_ first priority."

Mari stood up, nodding at Ellie. She liked Ellie. She liked Adam too, though he didn't seem to speak as much. They both did their job, co-operated and cared for others, so she couldn't really ask for anything else.

"Just look after my dinner for me."

"Will do."

Mari took a few seconds to pinpoint which of the tents belonged to the Filipino sisters. She unzipped it and peered it, barging in what seemed to be an intense conversation. The younger, thinner sister, Melanie, was turned away from her sister and shaking her head vehemently. They didn't even notice Mari. The elder sister shouted something in Filipino and the younger sister just shook her head, sobbing and shouting in Filipino back. Before anything else happened the older, chubby sister turned towards Mari. Her hurt expression changed, relaxing slightly upon seeing the newcomer.

"It's rude to barge in," she put her hands on her large hips, but relaxed when she realised Mari probably couldn't speak the same language she could. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

Mari had to remind herself to be polite. "Dinner's out there, if you want to eat."

"I'll get it," Eleanor said. She turned to her younger sister. "You stay." She left the tent, but made sure to give Mari a thankful pat on the back. Eleanor was usually pretty nice to Mari when they went out scavenging together, though she was different when she was around her sister. Mari wondered what they were talking about.

Mari turned around, watching Eleanor head to the campsite. She considered trudging after her, but she turned to Melanie and frowned, hoping Melanie would understand her:

"You can't just let her boss you around," Mari said. "You're not a kid."

Melanie just blinked confusedly. Mari decided it wasn't even worth trying to get her to understand. She turned around and Melanie spoke:

"Thank you."

Mari turned smiling at her. "So you do speak English?"

"Not as good as my sister, she lived in the U.S for many years," Melanie gave Mari a beautiful smile. "But I was the best in my class at English, so I like to think I'm somewhat good." She paused, blushing. "I like to pretend to not talk it, just so that I can avoid talking English with the other cooks."

"They don't bite. Not everyone is your sister."

Melanie laughed. "She's just protective. She's helped me through…" A pause. "Difficult times." Melanie forced a smile, though Mari knew there was more to it. She knew it wasn't worth poking into, though; Melanie's body almost screamed _I really want to be alone with my thoughts right now_. Mari gave Melanie a quick wave before leaving the tent. Just as she left, Eleanor was heading towards the tent with two polystyrene plates in hand.

"Remember to hand those back," Mari told her. "We try to re-use stuff here, now that stuff doesn't just get sold in stores."

"Awesome," Eleanor stopped before she entered the tent, turning to Mari. "Ever consider getting plates? Regular ones? I mean, we could wash those and there's a river not so far away. We could take it in turns, or it could be something the kids do – accompanied by babysitters, of course. It can teach them responsibility and teamwork… I mean, it's just safe to get this stuff nailed into their heads," she shrugged. "And it doesn't hurt to have someone to pull the weight a little, even if it's just a bit."

"That's not a half bad idea," Mari smiled, heading back towards camp. She'd remember to do that next time she scavenged.

* * *

 _Day 19_

The group dynamics over the last couple of days had gotten progressively easier, Oscar noted. He'd gotten used to scavenging, and it wasn't nearly as dangerous as it had been when the group had rescued him from his father's apartment. He'd even formed a kind of bond with Mari, Jaime and Eleanor, and they treated him as equals.

Similarly, Wendy, Selene and Jermaine also settled in quite nicely. Selene got on with the soft-spoken girls who helped her look after the kids, Wendy had struck up a friendship with the otherwise introverted Eli and Jermaine kept to himself largely – but that just seemed to be the way Jermaine liked it. Other than that, they steadily built up more supplies, even having proper cutlery and plates to eat dinner out of.

Every day or two the kids, accompanied with one of the guards and one of the babysitters, would make their way down to the nearest lake where they'd get water and wash the dishes that had been used. It was about a half mile trek, which was a lot for the kids, but over the next three days they had adjusted to it. Oscar still felt unhappy deep inside – every time he closed his eyes he saw Joseph getting dragged through the windscreen, and he had to purposely force himself to not worry about his mother and his friends in England in general, but the group had worked together well and had made the best out of a shitty situation.

He sat with Selene and they ate grapes for lunch. The only people around them were Adam, Ellie and Melanie, who did very little speaking and were instead focusing on preparing that night's dinner.

"I love it when we both get days off on the same day," Selene told Oscar, crunching down on a grape. Oscar noted that it sounded like they were living in civilisation with paying jobs – the whole concept of days off and having particular jobs sounded kind of strange, when put into perspective. "I don't know. I just don't see you anymore. And while I don't hate the girls, they can just talk about really boring things."

Oscar sniggered. "Like what?"

"Like Han, or about how cute Sierra is, or about how controlling Mari can be, or about how they think Maige has depression or…" Selene paused, smirking. "Don't even change the subject! I just don't get to see you anymore."

"We didn't see each other much anyway, considering we lived in different countries," Oscar shrugged, holding out a bunch of grapes. "Do you want extra? I'm really not hungry." He wasn't, which was unusual. Considering most days they only got three meagre meals a day, most of them lived with a constant sense of hunger in their bellies. Oscar wondered if he'd just adjusted.

"I know that, it's just…" Selene frowned. "I guess the best thing about the world going to shit is that we just spent a lot of time together, huddled up in dad's apartment. I kind of wish we didn't leave," Oscar glared at Selene, who looked at him defensively. "What? It's true and you know it. We still had food and water there, and there were less people it had to be fed to, and I don't care what Mari said but I felt safe in there." Selene took his grapes, slipping them into her mouth. After eating she spoke: "And I was just hoping that after all this time dad would just walk through that door."

Oscar felt bad for her. He didn't say anything, but he just patted her on the shoulder.

"We still have each other, and this group is a good deal. It's nice to have a lot of people looking out for each other, no?"

"I guess," Selene wiped some tears from her eyes with one finger. "D-Do you think dad is okay? Do you think we'll ever see him again?"

Oscar swallowed. Did he really think any of those were possibilities? I mean, maybe they would… Right? But Oscar couldn't bet on it too much either.

"He's probably safe in… where is it, Nevada?"

"Nebraska."

"He's probably there," Oscar made sure to give Selene his best smile. "So we just need to keep strong and survive, and it might take a while but we _will_ see him again," Oscar said firmly. A part of him even wanted to see his dad again, despite the complicated history. "And when he sees us and knows what we've had to do to see him again he'll be so, so proud of you."

Selene seemed to spontaneously burst into tears. Oscar flinched slightly, not expecting that reaction. They didn't seem to be happy tears either. Oscar tentatively watched as Selene threw the bunch of grapes he had given her onto his lap before she stood up. Ellie and Adam looked their way sympathetically, but hadn't decided to intervene.

"I'm just going to the tent," she said to them all, making her way off.

"Is she okay?" Adam asked Oscar hesitantly.

"She'll survive," Oscar watched her open the tent and slip into it.

"Ah, alright," Adam smiled. "Well, thanks to the _frozen_ steaks Mari found we're actually going to have steak tonight. Isn't that cool?" He paused. "Well, it's half a steak each, but it's still a luxury. Might be the last steak we could ever have so why not enjoy it?"

Oscar smiled just to be polite. He wasn't very interested in any kind of steak or food right now. He just felt fed up. He felt as if the pre-zombie infestation drama was soaking into the post-zombie infestation drama, and he didn't know how he felt about that. Selene was making her life more complicated, which was stupid when you realised that her life was pretty complicated to start with. If she'd seen those walkers grab Joe and devour him, she'd realise that she had much bigger problems than just not getting much brotherly time with Oscar.

Oscar perked up when he heard Ellie talk in a sympathetic, smooth tone: "Maige, hey… How are you holding up?"

Oscar glanced up, seeing Maige for the first time in well over the week. The last time he had seen her was at a distance, when she had broken down over the news of her father's death. He could see Joseph's sternness in her features, as well as in her neat appearance. There was something a little colder in her dark eyes, though. She approached Ellie with an indifferent expression.

"Sometimes when I go to sleep I don't want to wake up," Maige said blankly. "But I'll get better."

"Want me to make you coffee or something?" Ellie asked reproachfully.

"Please," Maige gave her a smile, though somehow when smiling she looked even more vulnerable. Ellie immediately got to work, looking around their rucksacks for some kind of coffee bean.

At first Oscar thought Maige didn't notice Oscar, but when she turned around with her hands on her hips a silence struck; even the gentle wind had refused to make a sound. Oscar wondered what Maige was thinking as she looked at the blonde teenager. Her bottom lip trembled slightly as if she searched for words. Eventually, she did.

"You must be Oscar."

"Er," Oscar paused. "Yeah."

Oscar knew she wanted to say more. She was torn between honesty and courtesy. "Cool."

Oscar wondered how much she knew. The only person she'd spoken to in the past week was Mari – how much did Mari tell her about her father's death? Maybe Oscar was just another newcomer to her, or maybe she knew Oscar was the one who had seen her father die. If that was the case, how did she feel about that? Maige sat down on the opposite side of Oscar and smiled at Ellie gratefully when Ellie had managed to make some coffee with coffee beans and boiled water.

"Reminds me of work," Maige said, inhaling the aroma of the liquid. "I never thought I'd miss working."

"Tell me about it," Adam smiled.

Maige ignored him, turning to Oscar. "Mari told me everything… About my dad… About how he sacrificed himself to save you." She sipped the coffee, her body language resolute.

"He was a good man," Oscar was searching for words.

Somehow, Maige went into hostile mode. Even when she spoke calmly Oscar couldn't help but feel the sharpness of her words: "That he was." She then went on the attack: "He was the most kind, generous and thoughtful man there ever was. I'd like to say his sacrifice was worth it. But nobody, _nobody_ could compare to my father. So I know that his sacrifice wasn't worth it."

Oscar blinked; he didn't quite know what to say. He wasn't going to stand there and let Maige attack him, but he did sympathise with her.

"He chose-"

"I don't care what he chose," Maige snapped. "You just let him give himself up because you would live? I don't care much for selfishness; you could've done something. _Anything_. But you chose what was convenient, you didn't care who it hurt."

"Maige," Ellie's voice was gentle. "You're being unfair."

"Unfair?" She wiped a lone tear from her eye. "What's unfair is that I don't have a dad. I have nobody. How the hell is that fair?" She challenged Ellie, who kind of hung her head in shame. Adam held Ellie's hand, ready to defend her if need be, but both didn't say a word. Then she turned to Oscar and glared at him, two tears pooling down her face now. "Whatever. I just hope you're happy… Because I sure ain't."

She dropped the coffee she held, which soaked into the grass, before storming back towards her tent. Oscar wanted to shout something profane back but he had been silenced. He felt like he'd been punched in the stomach and winded. Suddenly he was really questioning himself, and Joseph's death. Joseph _was_ a good man. A man who had saved Oscar… Had Oscar really been selfish by just letting him die like that?

He stared at the flickering flames, deep in thought and regret. Joseph's death had affected him enough anyway because he'd never seen anything so brutal in his life. Now he was suddenly showing symptoms of survivor's guilt, but he didn't know if he was guilty.

"Sorry," he looked up to see Selene making herself more comfortable next to him. "I just had a moment. I'm feeling a little better now."

"Oh…" Oscar stood up, not even looking at Selene. "It doesn't matter anyway. I'm scavenging tomorrow and I just need a nap or something." That was a lie; Oscar didn't know if he'd be able to sleep for a while. Not now.

* * *

 **So this is it! So many of the main cast have been introduced - I understand keeping track of them may be difficult, but hopefully you'll be acquainted with all of them soon enough, or even vaguely acquainted with them now. I mean, I won't be happy until I make you cry at _least_ twenty times, so we'll see how it goes, eh?**


	6. Revelations

**Remember what I said about cameos? Lets watch people who have played the Walking Dead Season 2 despise Oscar et al. And also find out a little bit about some of the game characters.**

 **\- Obviously this isn't _officially_ canon. But I'm filling in gaps wherever it seems fun or cool to do so.**

* * *

 _Day 24_

* * *

The sound of a crash was audible to all.

Oscar, Eleanor and Jaime all made their way to the window of the convenience store they were at. It had sadly already been picked at by other survivors, but they'd managed to find some tinned food, which was enough. However, they'd already developed a nice bundle of supplies, and considering it was Mari's day off they hadn't expected to find much anyway. As they peered out of the cracked window they noticed somebody had crash into the wall of another store. Naturally, it was a dinner bell for the lurkers that had been hiding around the street.

"Damn," Eleanor said to herself as the walkers flocked towards the car. "What do we do?"

"It's the perfect escape," Jaime said. "They'll be focused on whoever is in that car and we can get away."

Oscar had scavenged with Jaime a lot and he'd noticed that his first impression of the older man had been wrong. He initially thought that Jaime was somebody who was very family-orientated and respectable, and while that wasn't necessarily untrue, Jaime was definitely the most Machiavellian of the survivors, which was a part of his personality that could only be unearthed steadily. The only time Oscar saw Jaime smile or talk a lot was when he was with his daughter.

"Can we just let that happen?" Eleanor turned to Oscar. He bit his bottom lip. He hated making decisions. She turned to Jaime, tentative. "We can't let them die," Oscar surveyed the scene. A woman's screams were audible from within the car as walkers flocked around it. He immediately flashed back to Joseph's death about two weeks ago as the Walkers banged on the glass. There weren't that many with them. They could take them on. He hated to follow his heart instead of his head, but he wasn't being wholly stupid and he just couldn't let people die.

"Lets do it," Oscar removed his glock, nodding to Eleanor.

"What?" Jaime rubbed the back of his head agitatedly. "We still have supplies to get."

"You bundle them up," Oscar said, opening the door to the store. "Eleanor and I can take them."

Eleanor and Oscar made their way out into the street, with the surrounded car across the street. Together they steadily aimed, taking out the small horde of walkers. There were only ten or so, and both Oscar and Eleanor had gotten progressively good at using firearms thanks to Mari's tutorage. Before the Walkers even had the time to pay attention to the two, they were surrounding the car as mere corpses. Oscar noted with horror that one of the corpses was a dark haired woman in a business suit. She looked terribly like Selene. He stepped over her body to the passenger's seat of the car, opening it up.

Eleanor went to his side while Oscar looked at the man in the driver's seat. He was a stony faced man with shaded features, neat dark hair and an admirable moustache. There was a mild cut on his temple, probably because of said crash. He looked at his two saviours and then wiped the blood that trickled down his face. Oscar looked in the back where a terrified little girl was bundled up with two African American adults, who looked much less injured. Eleanor opened the backseat doors and helped the uninjured people out.

"Is everything okay?" Oscar asked the man, grabbing his hand and helping him out of the car. He stood tall, looking down at Oscar and giving him a kind smile.

"I'm fine, how's my little girl?" He turned around and looked at the tiny girl who must've been his. He rushed over to her, holding her tightly as she sobbed. Jaime had left the store and watched from the sidelines, his disapproval evident even from a distance.

"Thank you," the African American woman with extremely curly hair smiled at Oscar and Eleanor. "I thought we were walker meat. They were everywhere and you just saved us, didn't they, Alvin?"

Her dozy partner snapped out of his temporary daydream. He'd acted like he hadn't just been involved in a moderately intense car crash. "Huh? Yeah, I guess so," he smiled at Oscar. "Thanks, buddy."

"It's no problem. Nobody was bit, right?" Everybody shook their heads. Oscar didn't know if it was his place to rescue other survivors willy nilly, but he didn't know where he'd be had Mari not helped him. Maybe he'd even be dead. Eleanor didn't seem to protest when he spoke: "Oh, good. We have a camp about ten minutes from here, in a field by the highway. We've got a lot of weapons and food, our group is doing pretty okay. If you want to go there, feel free to. New hands to help out wouldn't be a bad thing," he looked to the little girl. "And there are children, too."

"Nu-uh," the woman shook her head, holding her husband's hand as if it were a defence mechanism. "Thanks for the offer, hon, but that ain't our plan right now. We wanted to move down to Virginia."

"Why?" Eleanor asked, hands on her large hips.

"My ex-wife is there," the man said, his gravelly voice commanding yet gentle. He held his daughter close. "My daughter, Eliza, needs her mother. And we were thinking that it's probably safer in Virginia than it is in New York, less big cities around and a little more spread out." His little girl didn't say anything. Too scared to even look at the strangers, she turned around and tucked her head into her father's shoulder. "I do appreciate the help, though," he walked closer to Oscar and stuck his hand out. "My name is Carver, by the way. These are my friends, Rebecca and Alvin. They're good people."

Oscar shook Carver's hand, noting that his grip was firm, very similar to Joe's. "Nice to meet you, Carver," when Carver moved closer to Eleanor to shake the young Filipino girl's hands, Oscar glanced at Alvin and Rebecca. Rebecca was keen to avoid eye contact, and Alvin smiled at him sheepishly.

"Is that your friend over there?" Carver glanced at Jaime, who kept a safe distance while he held a load of supplies.

"He's with us," Oscar said tartly.

"Well, you three could go south bound with us," Carver suggested. "It's good to see good people alive right now. And strong people, too. Never know what's out there, but I know there's not much space for the weak now." Oscar shuddered. Carver seemed nice enough, but everyone he had met so far had held some hope that civilisation would rebuild itself after everything had collapsed - I mean, it had only been three weeks ago. But Carver seemed much more cynical. "I would like to be surrounded by people like you. Not friends like Rebecca and Alvin, but allies."

"We're happy here," Oscar politely declined.

Carver shrugged, displeased. "We're in a spot of bother, anyway. We need a new car if we ever hope to get to Virginia."

"There's probably a car on this road you can hijack," Oscar said, glancing at some of the abandoned vehicles that were still neatly parked. "We have to get going soon, but if you want I can help you out. I'll get you back on the road, where you can find your ex."

"That's pretty darn great," Carver said. "Anything I can do?"

"Just unload your supplies and we'll get it into the new car," Oscar smiled. Carver only had to give Rebecca and Alvin a single glance to make them do as they were told. Rebecca rolled her eyes and huffed as Alvin unlocked the car trunk. Both of them steadily unloaded supplies with Eleanor while Oscar moved to the nearest car he could find, an abandoned red ford fiesta. He used his gun to smash the window, looking around tentatively as alarms blazed. All knowing that noise attracted walkers, everybody was on their highest alert.

"It'll turn off when you hotwire the thing, right?" Carver said, holding his scared daughter close. "Or you can do that?"

"Yeah," Oscar unlocked the car from the inside and slipped into it to hotwire it. "But it's still worth keeping an eye on things."

Carver chuckled darkly. "Trust me, son. I have eyes in the back of my head."

* * *

That was Oscar's good deed of the day done, but Jaime wasn't so happy. The older man folded his hands over his chest and watched as Carver, his friends and his daughter cruised down the street in their new car. When Oscar and Eleanor made their way towards the van he didn't even express his displease. He just opened up the van and bundled all the supplies they had gathered in. It wasn't much, but it was bountiful enough considering they had a nice stash back at home. He just wished Mari was with them. She'd probably be able to get more supplies and she'd tell Oscar why he'd just done something incredibly stupid.

As Oscar approached he didn't say anything, he just wrinkled his face with disgust. Oscar slid into the back of the van and Eleanor made her way into the passenger's seat. Jaime took a moment to collect himself before making his way to the driver's seat. He slammed the door a little harder than usual. He'd had a rough three weeks. Scratch that, a rough year. He needed to be angry sometime. He'd snap otherwise.

"I know you're not happy with what I did," Oscar said hesitantly. "But Mari helped me out. I think it's good to just... I don't know, be a good person."

"That was only a week into the disaster," Jaime said lowly.

"Come on," Eleanor said, turning to Jaime. "They were good people. They're alive because of us."

"Next time it probably won't be a good person," Jaime snapped, gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles whitened. "Mari doesn't tell you all this shit because she doesn't want panic but there's been a lot of fucked up things going on, and I don't just mean the dead eating people. People have been raiding people, stealing from them, killing them, _raping_ them. We've found a good bunch but we can't accept anyone else. I'm not endangering my wife and my little girl. We just keep ourselves to ourselves until the army take control of the country again."

Oscar turned to the window, contemplating for a moment.

"I worked in business all my life," Jaime stressed. "Trust me, people are more cutthroat than you can imagine. And that was just when money is involved. Now it's everyone's lives at stake. Can't you understand that? It's going to be a brutal time for all of us and we can make it easier for ourselves if we just stay out of it."

"He had a little girl," Eleanor said. "One day, that could be you and Sierra. Do you really want people to just leave you to die?"

"That's the thing, Elena," Jaime said quietly. "Most people will leave us to die."

He turned the keys and started the ignition just as two elderly walkers wandered onto the street corner. They looked after the survivors desperately as Jaime sped down the road, making his way back to camp.

* * *

 _Day 26_

* * *

So it turned out Eli wasn't mysterious in a romance novel kind of way like Wendy had originally anticipated. He was nicer to her than he was to other people, but that didn't mean that he was _nice_. He was gruff, cynical and he had a temper. But he seemed to warm to Wendy, albeit very slowly, over a period of a few weeks. There was also the point that he hadn't killed her friend with a chair, which made him much more desirable to talk to than Jermaine. When it was their guard duty, Wendy ambled along the outskirts of the camp with Eli, rambling on to him:

"Around that time of my life, I was dating Chris Peterson," she told him, rambling on about high school dramas that had happened almost a decade ago because she had nothing better to do. "But rumour had it he was gay, but I think he was bisexual because he left me for another girl," she struggled behind Eli as she held a heavy gun she was certainly not accustomed to. She stumbled a little bit. "But that isn't the end of the story-"

Eli turned to her and smiled, his amber eyes inspecting her for a second. "You don't shut up, do you?"

"I've been told I'm a good conversationalist," Wendy smiled. "There's no wi-fi or television so I'm trying to entertain myself the caveman way."

"The caveman way would be killing animals. And fucking."

Wendy scowled. "The Greek way, then."

"Fucking people of the same gender?"

She jabbed him with her elbow, though he didn't seem to react. "You're so crass!"

He laughed, not used to being received so playfully. Wendy looked up at the much taller guy, smiling briefly. She didn't know just what to think of him. Disregarding her for a second, he turned and strode a few metres in front of her as she lingered behind. Sometimes he would be warm and human. Other times he would seem to pretend that she didn't exist, or he wouldn't be very receptive of her. Was this teasing? Was he showing some kind of interest? Wendy sighed to herself. This was what happened when you were single for a whole six months.

She really needed to get laid or something. But considering it was the cusp of the end of the world, that probably didn't seem like it was going to happen. Not now.

"So tell me a little bit about you," with some struggle Wendy caught up. She was almost beginning to get used to the heavy gun in her hands - maybe she was an action girl, after all. Take that Mari. "I feel like I should be diagnosed with narcissism or something. I'm always talking about myself and you're never talking about yourself."

Eli raised his eyebrows, not saying anything.

"What?"

"Nothing," he said nonchalantly. "I just know an interrogation when I see one."

"How so?"

"Because I used to interrogate people for my job," he looked down at Wendy and gave her a very peculiar look. She didn't know if that was a joke or not, but for a second Wendy shivered. She felt interrogated despite being an open person. She didn't like it much. "Know about good cop, bad cop? You're being the good cop."

"And what cop were you?"

He smirked. "I'm not letting you know that. Some of us are good at keeping secrets."

Wendy's temper flared briefly. She put almost put her hands on her hips aggressively before she realised that she was holding a heavy gun. "Excuse me, believe it or not I can keep secrets," she tried to stop herself from pouting. "I haven't told you everything about my life. Just the kind of things that make for conversation. I'm not telling a stranger every single detail about my life. I'm not that dumb."

Eli looked down at her.

"I guess I'll figure you out soon enough," he paused, before turning around. "By the way, you look much cuter when you're not angry," he told her.

"Where are you going?" Wendy shouted to him as he walked away.

He didn't turn around, he just shouted back: "It's my turn to go to sleep, or to try to. I'm waking Jermaine up. He'll be with you in a second. And try to give him a break, will you? He's not that bad, just keep him entertained." He turned and gave her a smile that seemed genuine this time. "I'm sure he'll want to know all about Chris Peterson. Maybe he'll even kick his ass for you."

He soon sank into the night, completely out of Wendy's line of sight. She remained frozen for a brief second, just staring after him and smirking to herself. He was definitely flirting with her by this point, or he was at least teasing. Once the feeling of being alone completely struck she looked around the dark night, the nippy wind caressing her skin and birthing goosebumps around her. Maybe the reason she found Eli so fun to talk to despite his lack of conversational abilities was the fact that she could forget that she was constantly in some kind of danger.

At least she had her gun, though she hadn't perfected her shooting skills just yet and there was the chance that she could be ambushed by the creepers. Suddenly on high alert and anxious, Wendy turned three-hundred and sixty degrees to look around the area. It seemed like it was all clear, but it was still incredibly creepy. She turned around and looked at camp in the distance. Everybody had gone to bed, even the usual people who hung around the now extinguished fire. It was completely silent. Wendy jumped when she heard some kind of rustling sound. It was distant, but close enough.

She should have paroled around the camp - she'd just checked around the cornfield, where the rustling was coming from. She swore she saw a figure in the distance. Shit. She didn't want to seem like a wimp, but she definitely didn't want to kill a walker, and she couldn't afford to ignore it. She made her way toward it, making sure to exchange a few glances behind her shoulder. She slipped into the cornfield, which was so tall she could barely see anything else.

There was a moment of silence where she could only hear a choir of crickets chirping along with her own, nervous breaths. She stepped forwards slightly and then suddenly heard something walking behind her. Screaming, she turned around and was prepared to shoot.

Jermaine was chuckling.

"Guards aren't supposed to be easily scared," he told her, his eyes twinkling.

Why were men always so... _annoying_? And mysterious, in a simple kind of way.

"You'd shit your pants if you thought there was a walker somewhere here," Wendy told him, resisting the temptation to kick him square in the balls. "It's the fucking apocalypse." They started making their way out of the cornfield, shoving the growing corn aside. Jermaine snorted skeptically. "I bet ten dollars you'd even scream like a girl," Wendy smirked.

Shit... Wendy didn't even know if she _had_ ten dollars. Or even a nickel. Or any money. What if society fixed itself soon and she found herself completely broke? Hopefully the banking system hadn't collapsed. Maybe it would've been better for the U.S if it _did_ collapse. Wendy was taken out of her thoughts for a brief second and almost jumped when Jermaine let out a yelp which bordered on a high pitched screamed.

Wendy reacted almost instinctively, drawing her automatic gun and pulling the trigger down. The force was almost enough to dislocate her shoulder. Jermaine threw himself to the floor as smoke filled the air. The Walker eventually slumped, lying down on the floor like it had been a machine that was turned off. Wendy's hands ached like hell and her breaths were ragged. The surplus of adrenaline had caused her to continuously shake while Jermaine tentatively stood up again.

"D-Did you get touched?" Wendy asked him, stepping back.

"No," Jermaine said confidently. "Are you okay?"

 _No_. "I'm fine."

He cast a glance at the corpse behind him, almost as if he'd expected it to be reanimated again despite the multiple holes in its face and skull. "I owe you ten bucks."

* * *

 _Day 27_

* * *

Mari stormed out towards the lit fire once talk of a dead walker had reached her ears via Eli. Once she got there a significant population of the adult population were circled around it: the Filipino sisters, Jaime, Alyssa, Han, Adam and Ellie were all there, cooking breakfast as usual. This time there was a new guest who was provoking reactions of sadness, disgust _and_ curiosity: it was a corpse. Judging from the converse sneakers and the band t-shirt, whoever it belonged to couldn't be any older than twenty-five. But his skin looked like it had aged tenfold. Its teeth were sharp but almost threatening to come out of its gums. It was stiff in death, the rigor mortis having set in days ago.

Everybody looked at Mari and looked very, very scared. Almost like they knew how displeased she was going to be. She thought about her words and actions deeply, not wanting to lose her cool. She just pointed to the corpse.

"What is this?" She said, her voice scarily calm.

There was a silence as everyone glanced at her. Elena was the bravest:

"A Walker."

"And why do we have the ex-undead lying _right_ beside breakfast?" Mari's voice grew a little louder, a little more challenging. Before anyone dared to talk to her her she looked towards Ilene, who was bringing a sleepy Sierra to breakfast. "Don't bring her!" Mari said clearly. "One of _them_ is right there! Look after the kids, please!" Ilene's eyes widened. She didn't even need to be told twice; she reversed and made her way back towards the tent, making sure the other kids were bundled away with her. Once Mari was assured none of the kids would see, she turned back to business, hands on hips: "You better have a good explanation."

"Wendy and Jermaine killed it when they were on duty last night," Ellie said tentatively, looking anywhere but towards the corpse.

"Good, they're doing their job," Mari said. Maige made her way to the fire, standing next to Mari and wondering what everyone was arguing about. She looked at them all in turn. "So why didn't we just dispose it instead of, I don't know, putting it on display? God knows what would've happened if the kids saw that."

Maige scraped her top lip against her bottom teeth, thinking.

"She's right. This seems a bit unnecessary." Maige always had Mari's back.

Han grabbed the head of the young corpse, dragging it so that it rested on his lap. A few people expressed their disgust with their facial expressions and Han made sure to explain himself:

"I thought I would keep it for medical purposes," everyone gave him a shifty glance. "My major is neuroscience, and I've studied it for like four years. I mean, I'm no expert - not officially - but I'm just about the best deal you can find," it was the most the usually silent boy had ever spoken. He began to look uncertain, as if he were doubting himself: "If there's anything seriously wrong with the brain I can probably figure it out, but I dunno..." He shrugged nervously. "I'd just need a knife and at least twenty minutes to work something out."

"I can help," the quieter Filipino sister, Melanie, said. "I went to medical school back into the Philippines," everyone looked at her, shocked that she had spoken more than four words of english. She made her way towards Han, kneeling down and looking down at the corpse. "If you need any kind of help with dissecting, I can probably help. Maybe if we can work out whatever's wrong with this thing we can figure something out. I mean, there are probably scientists trying to work it out from all over the world, but we don't have them. We can try figure something out now."

Maige nodded.

"It's a good idea."

Mari was more tentative.

"Just hurry. The kids need their breakfast and they can't see this," Mari said, curious to see if Han would discover something. He did seem to be a smart kid, afterall. What if he knew the disease? Or if there was a cure, or even the slightest glimmer of hope? It was worth a shot.

"Yeah, if you were planning to eat breakfast maybe you should go hungry for another twenty minutes," Han said tentatively, glancing towards Ellie and Adam who were frying something. Taking the hint, they made sure to fry it a little bit slower.

Melanie held the side of the head, making sure it was still while Han removed a knife. He didn't seem pleased with the instruments available, as they were hardly professional surgical instruments, but he made do with what he had. Maige, Adam and Ellie strolled off together, finding the procedure a little too graphic for their tastes. Everybody else watched with morbid fascination as Han slit the skin behind one ear, drawing it violently across the crown and managing to cut the skin behind the other ear with some difficulty. Dark blood seeped down from the head.

A revolting smell followed - the body didn't smell like roses initially, but this smell attacked Mari's senses more potently. She wrinkled her nose, used to the smell of death while the medics seemed to work on the corpse.

"I usually need something which can cut through the cranium," Han explained to himself, his nerdiness showing. His hands were coated with blood. "But I don't have a stryker saw, so we should expect some tissue damage."

"Hopefully it won't ruin things," Melanie said to him seriously.

Han shrugged, and then he rammed his knife harshly into the skull. He seemed almost delicate, albeit sinister, when slitting the skin open. Now he was struggling to draw a line through bone, gritting his teeth and destroying the cranium. After much struggle a dark, decomposing brain had fallen into his hands like jelly. Everybody made sure to show their disgust bar Melanie, Mari and Han, who carried a professional demeanour. Han looked down at the brain, as if he couldn't believe he were doing this, and then he began to expect.

"I wish I listened in class more," Han said worriedly, trying to stop and think. "Okay... I would usually have to weigh this but I guess this isn't a time for medical rigour, right?"

"Think of it as a very shoddily done Virchow technique style autopsy," Melanie smiled to him. He smiled back.

"Okay," Han inspected the brain for a while. "I guess we can't establish cause of death from brain alone. I mean, I can see the bullet damage," he peered over the brain. "T-There's incisions in the cerebellum and the midbrain, thanks to Wendy, but I don't know how this guy died," he paused, looking somewhat confused as he looked over the brain. "But _that's_ weird. That's really, really weird."

"What is?" Mari said.

Melanie looked over it. She seemed to struggle to get why Han was so confused, but once her eyes followed his she suddenly seemed to click onto something. She squinted, as if she couldn't quite trust reality.

"What is it?" Mari said, impatient.

"I don't know the English word," Melanie said meekly. "When organs..." She tried to think of a word. "Rot."

"Decompose," Han said. "As we can see by the blackened brain, the brain is in a state of decomposition, which makes the autopsy even more difficult to be certain but..." He scratched his head. "Usually the brain follows a fixed rate of decomposition. In fact, it _always_ does, unless parts of it are preserved. But there are parts of this brain that are more decomposed than others, almost as if they died somewhat later," Han inspected closer, cutting out a chunk of the brain with his knife and looking at it closer. "Parts that are _essential_ for us to survive are a lot less decomposed. The hypothalamus, and all of the occipital and parietal lobes have died very recently... But then there's other parts, say the frontal lobe, they're completely dead."

"What do they do?" Alyssa asked, as if she didn't want to know the answer.

"Memory. Personality. Emotion... The majority of what makes us _us_ was dead before the parts that just make us a biological machine that walks and eats," Han explained. "Which means that whatever these zombies are, they're not human. They're alive, that's certain, but the human part of them - the intelligent part of them - is just rotting and decomposing like the rest of them."

Some people like Melanie and Jaime seemed saddened by Han's well reasoned conclusion. They'd realised what Mari had suspected all along: these dead things couldn't be cured. They were already dead. There was no bringing them back, there was only killing the part of them that kept them alive and dangerous. Han inspected the tattered brain a little bit more, fascinated by the medical implausibility. Then he finally dropped the brain, letting it rest on the grass before him.

"Is that all you can discern?" Jaime said, almost quietly.

"Unless I have the tools necessary to perform a biopsy," Han said wistfully. "Which I don't. And even if I did I'm not an expert," Mari begged to differ - he knew much more than most people. Maybe the definition of an expert needed to be more liberal now that most experts were probably dead or going to die. "I don't know. All I know is that something keeps part of them alive..."

"And even then it's just a theory," Jaime mumbled, frustrated.

"Hypothesis," Han corrected him quickly. "But a very reasonable one. One I'm very confident in. But the aetiology of this thing? I don't know. Could be a specific kind of poison, a virus, a parasite, a unique neurological disorder..." He shrugged. "I'll spare you the ramble."

Mari was growing concerned. What the fuck was happening to people? She glanced at Melanie.

"Do you know what's up?"

Melanie shook her head. "No. He's a bigger brain expert than I am. If he's stumped, I'm stumped."

Well, Mari felt a little bit more enlightened. But it was like a hydra; the more questions that were answered just led to more questions being created. Mari hoped she lived to see them all being answered.

* * *

Jaime slipped into his tent, feeling somewhat empty inside. A part of him wished Han didn't find out what he did. Mari and a few others had managed to kill walkers without so much as batting an eye, but for those who feared Walkers were people trapped inside an empty shell... It was just hard. Now it had felt like a hope was crushed... if he or any of his family turned there'd be not going back. At least now they knew for certain that they just had to shoot the Walkers and be done with it. Though even that was difficult. Walkers were monsters, but they still resembled people so well.

Jaime was a businessman through and through... He always did what had to be done, even if it was ruthless. But just shooting someone who used to be human in the head? He knew he could do it, especially when family were at stake, but it was a shitty thing to do.

He immediately glanced up and realised that within the enclosed tent there was some kind of commotion going on. Ilene was curled up in the corner of the tent, sobbing and holding her daughter. Inside the tent Thomas and Jareck were eagerly huddled around Chelsea, who was holding a gun. Jaime immediately went into panic mode when he realised the young girl was holding a _gun_.

"Remember, this is a single action gun," Chelsea waved it around for all to see. "You pull the trigger once and then there's one bullet... And you have to manually reload it by-" She glared up at Jaime, who had her gun in his hand. He stood up tall whilst she attempted to jump up and snatch the gun from him.

"Oh no, don't," Thomas sighed. "She was going to shoot cans!"

"Not in a tent," Jaime said, glancing down at Chelsea worriedly.

"Just get them out!" Ilene sobbed almost hysterically, as if something awful had happened. She was probably just being emotional again. Ilene kept a calm facade, but Jaime knew by now that when something upset her she really did melt into overdrive. "They haven't listened a word I've said. I've had enough!" Sierra looked around confusedly. "Please, Jaime, please!"

The kids didn't need Jaime to tell them. Chelsea walked out without a word, and Jareck put his hands on a reluctant Thomas' shoulder and smiled at him whilst guiding him out of the tent.

"Don't worry Thomas, bugs are just as interesting as guns..."

Once they were out Ilene sobbed even more fiercely, trying to bury her head into her own lap. Sierra, not quite understanding, simply stroked her mother's hair and looked at her father worriedly. Jaime tried to process what had just happened, putting his hands on his hips and pacing in the very enclosed tent.

"What was that for?"

"They are out of control," Ilene said. "They are out of control. They don't listen!"

Jaime paused. "This is an overreaction, what the hell are the camp going to think of us once they find out you've been crying and screaming like a madwoman?" Ilene calmed down, stroking her hands down her hair and then wiping the tears from her eyes. Jaime knew that misbehaved children had just made Ilene be cathartic and release emotions that had been bubbling inside her for well over a month, but he couldn't afford for the two to lose their cool. "They're going to think that we're a liability. Or worse, that we're untrustworthy."

Ilene snapped at Jaime:

"I'm fed up of pretending that we're just some happy family," she said, dangerously quiet. The tears that had re-emerged in her eyes had told Jaime that it wasn't a tranquil kind of quietness, though. "I'm fed up of acting like mother hen of the group. I'm fed up of pretending. You may be good at pretending Jaime, with your little secrets, but I'm fucking not."

Ilene almost forced Sierra off her, picking her up and placing her on the ground with a gentleness only a mother could muster despite the force she was using. Sierra was a little taken aback, looking up at Ilene with wide eyes and immediately crying. The stress was really getting Jaime. First Ilene, and now his daughter (which was admittedly more acceptable considering she was five). This was going to attract a _lot_ of unneeded attention.

"Secrets?" Jaime snarled, ignoring Sierra's background wailing.

Ilene paused before she left the tent.

"This is what I mean. You can deny shit Jaime, but I can't," she turned to him. "Affairs. Drugs. A fucking failing business. _You_ ruined our marriage!" A pointed finger was aimed at Jaime's throat. Ilene spoke with such rage that spit was coming out of her; Jaime's usually beautiful wife looked anything but pretty. "I could trust a politician more than I can trust you! You kept all these secrets from me and because I never got solid evidence you still think it's okay to pretend that nothing is happening. It's the end of the world and you _still_ lie to me. Again and again!" Jaime was certain the whole camp was crowded around the tent, listening in. His paranoia was making him anxious. "And you don't do it for practical reasons. You just want to look good to other people. All you've cared about is _your_ image."

Jaime was just as furious this time. He spoke coolly, though he knew he looked just as angry as his wife. He knew this was upsetting for Sierra, but he didn't care.

"You can accuse me of whatever you want, but it wasn't me who was caught sleeping with another woman, was it?"

Ilene looked at Jaime, initially stunned. She looked like she was going to reply - to insult Jaime with any word that she could conjure. But she just turned around and forced herself out of the tent, storming to anywhere else. Sierra was still crying as Jaime looked on after her emptily.

* * *

 _Day 30_

* * *

"Then he said something to her," Ellie told the group around the fire quietly. "I don't know what he said. To be honest, I didn't hear much, but it really affected her." She looked at everyone in turn. "She just... calmed down, almost. Then she stormed towards the river. I don't know what had upset her so much, but what he said must've been really bad. I've never seen anything make Ilene explode so much, but I've never seen her shut up so quickly too."

As Jaime had anticipated, somebody had kind of overheard the drama that had gone off between the Motts days ago. The frosty relationship between the Motts had been made clear for a while now, and only Ellie heard their explosive encounter, though she gave a limited report. They'd all just left after a subpar dinner had been served and eaten, and everybody looked towards their tent as if they'd expected another argument to explode. Ellie didn't like to gossip, but the pressure from Oscar, Selene, Alyssa, Han and Maige had definitely made her crumble.

"Something is definitely going on there," Alyssa said, glancing towards their tent. "It's kind of weird. Ilene is usually very composed and sweet. The kids said they weren't even being that bad, Chelsea just didn't listen to her when she told Chelsea to put her gun away. Chelsea refused, being Chelsea and all, and she just seemed to go into rage mode. God knows what's going on to make her so upset."

"The end of the world, perhaps?" Han suggested. He didn't participate in the conversation much, not finding it any of his business. He just sat and contemplated.

"It's not the end of the world," Alyssa glared at him. "And I think it's something else. What if she's pregnant?"

"I hope not," Maige said to Alyssa, looking into the fire and enjoying its warmth. She'd be a lot more social, though she was far from over her father's death - she'd just reached the point where she didn't want to be alone. Because the loneliness killed her and created toxic thoughts. "When there's no hospitals and whatever the last thing we'd want is a pregnant lady. Could end badly."

Selene looked up at Maige anxiously.

"You don't think so?"

"I know so."

Oscar wanted to make a comment, but he knew he'd only be treated with contempt by Maige. The only thing that stopped him from losing his cool was that Maige was polite to everyone else, in a blunt kind of way. She'd even been quite nice and talkative with Selene. He just looked at his hands, which were pink with the cold, while everybody else came up with all sorts of theories: hormones, mental illness, and a range of dramas. Alyssa's theories were particularly complex and implausible, like Ilene were part of Desperate Housewives.

"We should just leave them alone," Maige said. "Jaime is a good scavenger, and Ilene is usually good with the kids. They pull their weight for this group. It'd be unfair of us to be proddin' our nose in their business."

"The lady speaks sense," Han smiled. Alyssa jabbed him in the side.

"What, and you're telling me that my theory of Ilene being manipulated by Martians is _not_ plausible?"

"Well, considering the dead are walking I guess nothing should be excluded," Han smiled at her, instinctively brushing some hair off the side of her face. "But I'm afraid I wouldn't consider your theory probable."

"Yeah, yeah," Maige smirked, looking at the two young, flirting adults. They were cute, and it was rare Maige called something cute. It reminded her of the budding romances she'd experienced when she was younger - none of them successful. There was always something cute about young love. Especially when it was so unexpected. When the nice and bubbly Alyssa came to camp, Maige wouldn't have paired her with someone like Han, who was the second most quiet person in the group unless he was talking about brains, corpses or both. "Anyway, I just need to go pee. I'll see you all in a minute."

Maige stood up, adjusting her jeans slightly. Adam gave her a weird look.

"What?"

"You don't ever say you'll be back, because you won't."

Ellie laughed. "He's just being silly, Maige."

"She isn't blonde," Alyssa reasoned. "And her boobs don't look like melons have been stuffed down her shirt."

"Hey!" Maige said.

"Just don't go investigating any strange noises," Alyssa said coolly. Maige glared at her, but broke her facade and smiled slightly.

She made her way towards the forest, strolling across the large field. The tall trees somehow managed to cast a shadow into the already dark night. As Maige bordered the forest, she turned and saw Eli patrolling around the camp, intimidating gun in hand. He seemed to notice Maige, and gave her a nod of acknowledgment. She nodded back before delving into the forest, suddenly feeling uneasy as she walked across thin branches and sturdy tree roots. In the day the forest looked nice - it was green and full of life. But now it was creepy.

Maybe it was because corpses seemed to be literally crawling out of their graves and eating people. Maige was aware that there were probably Walkers in the forest. Paranoid, she reached for the handgun she usually kept on her and realised that it wasn't there. She must have left it back at camp.

"Shit," she hissed. She looked around. The coast was clear, though it was scarily silent.

Maige didn't like peeing so close to camp; she'd always been a pretty private person, which she'd inherited from her father. But it would have to make do, considering she already felt like she was in enough danger. After doing her business she buckled her pants and looked around uncomfortably, not enjoying how unhygienic and violated she currently felt. Mist had seeped into the forest and obscured her from seeing far into the horizon.

But she swore she heard something. A branch snapping, someone harshly whispering. She couldn't quite pinpoint the source of the sound but she definitely knew there was _something_.

Maige wasn't going to investigate the noise; even if she hadn't been comically warned by Alyssa she was too scared. Maige hated feeling scared. She was supposed to be the leader of the group, or one of them. Right now she didn't feel like how a leader should feel. Shaking, she abruptly turned around and almost crashed into a hooded figure. She stumbled back, not catching sight of the person's face as she fell to the ground. She immediately knew that it wasn't someone from her camp, and when she caught the glimpse of flashing metal as said person unsheathed their sword she knew she had to fight.

* * *

Alyssa and Han strolled around the edge of the forest, arms linked cordially as they walked, talked and even laughed. Han had recently opened up a lot more to Alyssa. She brought him out of his shell, which is something that nobody had been able to do with him in a long time. Even around his family he was reserved and somewhat shut off. But she was kind, and talkative and knew what buttons to press if she wanted to annoy and amuse him. When he thought about it, he didn't think they were compatible. But there was _something_ right between them.

"Okay, okay," Alyssa paused, bringing him out of his deep thoughts. He looked down at her, and she smiled up at him. They were talking about mental illness in movies, or something. "So you're telling me that schizophrenia is _not_ a split personality disorder?"

"No," Han smiled. "That's just a stupid misconception. Split personality disorder is a split personality disorder. Did you not take psych 101?"

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "I've never taken anything psychology related. And even if I did, school was always a bit of a blur..." Han got the feeling that Alyssa was avoiding something, there was something that made her uncomfortable. He knew that he treasured his personal boundaries, so said very little; it was none of his business, and he respected that.

"Well, if you want I could tell you about schizophrenia," Han eventually smiled shyly. He was always going to grab a nerd out opportunity when it came to him. "I find it the most interesting mental illness, just because I think the nature and nurture of it is a lot more complex-"

Alyssa stopped abruptly, turning to face Han. She put two hands on his chests to halt him and stop him from walking. There was a moment where they just exhaled, their condensed breaths melding together. A profound awkwardness melted over Han as Alyssa put one finger on his chest, almost blushing herself. She hung her head to hide her embarrassed expression.

"You know, usually this is the point you'd make a move..." She said.

Han cleared his throat. "There's a definitive point?"

"Yeah... I mean, if you want to."

"No." Han paused. That came out wrong. "As in no, I want to."

Alyssa stood on her tip toes, whispering to him and suppressing a giggle:

"Then kiss me, idiot."

Han's palms were stupidly sweaty. He'd only ever kissed approximately three times before, and two of those times were for dares - the other time the girl he kissed conveniently did not want to talk to him again. What if his breath was bad? What if he had no idea what he was doing? He didn't want to blow this, oddly. And for the first time in his life he actually really wanted to kiss Alyssa. As she leaned up, he nervously leaned down, his heart almost exploding with a combination of fear and exhilaration. Just before the awkward encounter ended with a kiss, Alyssa threw herself away and turned her head towards the forest.

There was a piercing scream coming from it. Maige's scream. Han felt his pulse race even more intensely, for reasons that weren't Alyssa related.

* * *

 **Hey! I think that's my first cliffhanger of this story, kind of?**

 **... New readers, I'm just clearing this up: there will be lots more.**

 **Just clearing up the Eleanor/Elena thing: Eleanor is her name, Elena is her nickname. I flutter between the two because I feel like it. Sorry for the inconsistencies :p**

 **Also, studying Psychology, I'd never expected to put my neurological knowledge to use before! I made sure to google a few things to make sure I was completely on track, but I kind of know the (theory) on how to conduct a brain autopsy... So, yay me?**

 _ **~Toxic**_


	7. Secrets

**You know, I'm a Michonne stan too. I'm petitioning myself for a Michonne cameo. That needs to happen, right?**

* * *

 _We have but faith: we cannot know;_

 _For knowledge is of things we see_

 _And yet we trust it comes from thee,_

 _A beam in darkness: let it grow._

* * *

 _Day 30_

* * *

Han immediately went into action mode. He knew he was in danger, but Maige was too and he just couldn't leave her to get hurt. His brain went into overdrive and he thought of a ten second plan.

"Get Eli," he told Alyssa quickly. He pulled himself away from her and she clung onto his hand, terrified for him. With some regret, he yanked his hands away. "Just get him. I'll get to her. Go!"

Alyssa and Han broke into a run at the same time, charging in two opposite directions. As Alyssa rushed down the field with an impressive speed, Han stumbled through a misty forest. He could barely see the ground and continuously lost pace, almost tripping a few times. The whole place looked identical: big tree after big tree. And since that initial, blood curdling scream Han hadn't heard anything of Maige. He did not know if that was a good sign or a bad sign.

He held onto a tree as a stitch burned at his side. Considering Alyssa appeared to be a much better runner than he was, maybe she should've done the rescuing. Han glanced around the eery forest, which looked like something right out of a horror movie. He hoped for some kind of clue for what to do. Any sign that Maige was alive. He moved forwards tentatively, not knowing what the hell he was doing.

He turned around sharply just as a girl crashed into him. He was forced onto the ground, his back throbbing.

"Fuck!" Maige said. Han groaned, grabbing onto a tree and forcing himself to stand steadily. "Fuck. Han. We have to go. There's someone who is trying to kill us."

"What did he do?" Han looked around wearily. Now would really be a good time to have a gun, come to think of it.

Maige was struggling to talk due to her constricted breaths. She leaned against the tree, looking around wearily. "I bumped into him. I think it was a him," she didn't get a glimpse of the person's face. "He took out some kind of sword. I didn't have time to look at him or anything," Maige was considerably calmer but was still looking around nervously. Han was also antsy, but tried to keep a cool head. "I just got up and ran. I didn't look back. We need to find him. He's a danger."

"Okay," Han bit his bottom lip slightly. "I think we should go back to camp first, though."

Maige nodded. "Should we run?"

"I think we're safe," Han didn't like using the word _think_. He preferred certainties.

The two turned back towards the camp and made their way hesitantly. They were torn between running fast and going slowly and stealthily. Halfway through their journey they'd received a shock when they'd bumped into someone, but it was only Eli. Thankfully, Eli was armed to the teeth with knives and a machine gun, which made Maige feel secure again. What was a sword against a gun?

They made their way back to the outskirts of the forest. Those who had been awake were waiting for them in the field nervously. Adam and Ellie were holding hands and Alyssa was visibly happy to see Han make his way out alive. After running towards Han and giving him a very tentative hug, Eli glanced towards all of the others with his harsh eyes before talking.

"I'm going to go around the forest and look for this person," Eli said. "I need some target practice anyway. Jermaine will be on guard around here while I look around. Just go to bed, we'll be alright."

Everybody looked at each other hesitantly before walking off, mumbling around the drama amongst each other. A few made their way back to the campfire, others made their way to their tents in an attempt to sleep. Han watched everybody walk away while Alyssa clung tightly onto his arms. For a brief seconds, his eyes met Maige's while she picked up her gun from around the campfire. He'd know she'd make sure to never let it go.

* * *

 _Day 31_

* * *

After breakfast, Maige made sure to corner Eli. He'd seemed to be extra avoidant that morning, not even attempting to get any breakfast. She'd been really paranoid about the hooded person she'd bumped into. There was something eery about him or her - the way they popped out of nowhere, the way they held a sword so comfortably. Maige got the impression that even someone with a gun would have a hard time against them.

She didn't tell anyone at breakfast, for fear of being mocked, but she'd even had a nightmare. She'd relived last night in her dreams, though this time she didn't get to run away and Han and Eli weren't there to get to her rescue. The man looked down at her and raised his sword and she'd woked up alone in her tent saturated in sweat, her pulse racing like it never had before. She had no-one left now. Nothing to live for. Her father and mother were dead, and god knows what had ever happened to her brother, but she didn't want to have the same fate as any of them.

Maige was terrified of dying. Her heart ached every day for her father, and she didn't want to admit it but her mother's death all those years ago had left scars in her mind. She didn't want to be like them. Not ever.

She trudged across the field, holding a flask of hot chocolate which Ellie had kindly prepared for her. She found Eli leaning against a tree, holding a gun in one hand and using the other to take repeated drags out of a cigarette.

"You know, I don't remember anyone scavenging cigarettes," Maige said, folding her arms across her chest and trying to appear authoritative. It didn't seem to faze Eli much, she barely acknowledged her.

"Found it in the shirt pocket of someone who'd died in the forest," he said casually. He held half of the cigarette out. "Want a drag?"

Maige tried not to sound as taken aback as she was. "My mom died of cancer. I try to avoid things that'll lead me down the same road as her." Eli just shrugged and Maige found herself grappling with conversation. With Eli, she didn't know how to reach the point of conversation she wanted to. She decided to cut down to the chase. "Did you find whoever it was last night, and kill them?"

"I didn't find nobody," Eli said. "Nobody who was alive, anyway. And none of them were hooded."

Maige sighed. "Shit."

"Hm," Eli dropped the cigarette, stomping on it and crushing it with his boot. He ran a hand through his dark hair, his face scrunching up briefly as he thought. "I doubt it is anything, just worried he'll tell a group about us. If he even knows that there's an us. For all we know, we could have attracted the scent of some scavengers. And by scavengers I don't mean our nice scavengers who run through town and pick up stuff that's lying about the remnants of civilisation. I mean the kind of scavengers who find survivors and enslave them. Usually they kill the men. They keep women and children for other purposes."

Maige's throat tightened a little.

"It's not even been a month since the apocalypse. The army are still working-"

Eli glanced up at her. "But the army haven't won yet. Trust me, some sick fucks out there are enjoying this temporary state of anarchy. There's no police and a very distracted army. It's like a kid walking into an empty sweetshop, isn't it?"

"He only had a sword..."

Eli loaded his gun.

"Then he won't be too hard to kill."

* * *

The weather was kind of mild, and the sun was the perfect temperature for the children, who were skipping and playing around the surrounding field while Selene and Alyssa desperately tried to keep them under control. Ellie and Adam watched from a distance, mild smiles on their faces as they enjoyed the pleasant weather. It was almost as if Maige hadn't just bumped into a creepy, stalker-y stranger the previous night.

Opposite the playing children, on the border of the forest, Adam noticed that Maige was talking to Eli. He was more observant than he'd appeared, and he'd noticed that Eli didn't talk much, but he was beginning to open up to Maige and Mari (the leaders of the group) and his co-workers, Jermaine and Wendy. Maige seemed like she was done with Eli and made her way back towards the campfire. Adam anticipated her joining them for a chat, but she strode past them and made her way towards the children.

"I wish Han would help us," Ellie commented as she peeled a kiwi with a knife. She gasped as she almost nicked her thumb, but continued when she realised it was a false alarm. "Or Melanie."

Adam smiled. "Han worked his butt off last night, and Melanie is officially the medic of the group, being a med school graduate and all. She's too important for us earthlings."

Ellie looked like she was about to protest, but caved in to reason. "Yeah. You're right. I just feel like there's all this drama and death going on and we're just here peeling kiwis or boiling something. Kind of anti-climactic."

"It keeps us alive."

Right on cue, Oscar made his way towards the campfire. Adam felt bad for the guy. The others were out scavenging and the only other person he really knew, Selene, was busy looking after crying children. Oscar looked at them almost apologetically, before sitting down.

"What's for lunch?" Oscar asked.

"The children get cookies and half a kiwi, and we get a _whole_ kiwi," Ellie said, forced cheer drenching her tone.

"Wow," Oscar paused. "I feel like this is how Gwyneth Paltrow's daily routine went."

Adam paused. He briefly wondered if Gwyneth Paltrow was even alive. Maybe she was.

"I suggested mac and cheese," he shrugged, turning to Ellie. "But I was told that mac and cheese wasn't an option."

Ellie rolled her eyes. "Maybe, doofus, that's because we don't have macaroni," she tapped him on the nose as if we were a puppy, smirking. "And we _don't_ have cheese. Get it now?"

Adam smiled at her. "When this is all over I am so going to eat so much mac and cheese."

Ellie licked her lips, fantasising about food. "What about pizza?"

"We are going to order so much pizza."

Oscar cringed a little when they kissed. He wasn't beyond kissing... Or anything more than that, for that matter, but public displays of affection were way too much for him. Still, Ellie and Adam were nice enough, and were easily the most welcoming people in the group. He left them to do whatever couples do for five second, absent mindedly focusing his attention to a white butterfly that fluttered past.

He turned back to Adam and Ellie, who were no longer kissing but were holding each other's hand affectionately. Adam whispered something that made Ellie burst into laughter. Not wanting to appear standoffish, Oscar decided to initiate conversation:

"So, you two are pretty tight, right?"

"Well, we're just two fools in love," Ellie smiled. "So maybe you could say that."

"Oh," Oscar forced a smile. He kind of wished he'd had the same affection from somewhere. Having an estranged father, an emotionally distant mother and a sister that only seemed to care about her grades didn't lead to the most loving of upbringings. And he'd never really had much romance with the exception of a few terminal relationships and even more hook ups. "How did you meet? Work or something?"

"No," Ellie rolled her eyes and then laughed. "It's the twenty first century. We met on the internet."

"Oh, I've used dating apps," Oscar said. He omitted the fact that it didn't result in anything more than a few awkward dates and - if he was lucky - a one-night stand. Looked like they hit the relationship jackpot.

"Not dating apps, I'm too awkward for that, we met on a forum. We both liked horror fiction and it just kind of grew from there," Adam squeezed her hand. "I lived in Georgia, worked for the Georgia Aquarium. But after one and a half years of long distance I decided I couldn't take it anymore. We lived in Binghampton. Prepared for a new life and then... yeah," he shrugged unsurely. "Messed up stuff like this happened. But we'll get through it. We're survivors."

"How did you survive?" Oscar asked.

Ellie seemed a little more uncomfortable with the topic. Oscar realised that most of the people in the group had probably lost relatives. Talking about the whole apocalypse deal was probably _way_ more uncomfortable for them. Selene was definitely torn up whenever anything reminded her of her father - it must be worse for people like Maige, those who knew their relatives were definitely dead.

"We just drove as far as possible, ended up on the outskirts of Buffalo. Car broke down, but Maige and Joe were perfectly happy to help us. Now we're the camp's cooks, even though both of us aren't that experienced with cooking," Ellie smiled unsurely. "I miss Joe. I barely knew the guy, but he was always very sweet to me."

Adam frowned. "He told me I was punching above my own weight when he first saw me."

Oscar and Ellie both laughed, though Adam seemed much less pleased. Oscar's facial expression dropped when he craned his neck slightly and caught a glimpse of Maige making her way towards her tent. He didn't know why she got to him so much, but her mere presence was a bit of a raincloud. And it didn't help that he definitely felt responsible for her father's death.

* * *

 _Day 33_

* * *

Melanie sat by the campfire, watching as everybody else socialised. The children were playing together as usual, giving the adults in charge a hard time. The guards would be out scavenging. Adam, Ellie and Han had just dished out lunch and were taking a break in their respective tents. She was all alone, as usual. Since telling everybody else she was a medic she'd become even more isolated from the group. No longer was she part of a group, messily cooking scraps for people. Now she just sat around all day until Jareck cut his leg or something.

There was her sister, but most of the time Elena was out scavenging. And then there was the worry that Elena would die while out scavenging too. Joe had died... Melanie wasn't stupid. She knew Elena was constantly in danger, and she didn't like it. She'd lost too many people in her short life. In fact, her sister was probably the only person she had left. She couldn't afford to lose Elena too.

Right on cue, Elena was out of her tent. She yawned and stretched, sitting on a log opposite Melanie.

"Hey," Melanie said in Filipino. "You took your time getting up."

"I had lunch, I got full, I took an afternoon map," her sister replied. "When I'm not out there watching the dead stumble around and fearing for my life I think I deserve a nap, no?"

"Yeah," Melanie replied, the wind carrying her dark hair. She plucked a daisy from the grass, watching it twirl around between her fingers. Her sister perked up, knowing that there was something wrong with Melanie. Elena had always been Melanie's guardian angel. She knew exactly when there was something wrong with Elena. Knowing that there was no point in trying to hide her feelings with her sister around, she voiced her concern: "You know how there are zombies walking and eating people?" She dropped the daisy she held, the wind forcing it to roll into the fire where it shrivelled into blackness. "Do you think _he_ is walking and eating people?"

Elena gave that shocked reaction that Melanie rarely saw.

"He..." Elena rubbed her temples a little. "No. You only turn if you're bitten. And he's deep in a grave now, so even if he did there's no getting out."

"What about mother?" Melanie's stone shook.

Mari vaulted over the log and sat next to Melanie, immediately forcing a jump out of the young Filipino girl. Not that Melanie found Mari intimidating - despite being a tough cookie, Melanie found her the most welcoming member of the group, along with Han, Adam and Ellie. But that was sudden and unexpected. Elena was immediately quiet, just looking into the flames.

"Hey," Melanie smiled.

"How has your first week as the official medic been?" Mari asked with a smile. She knew she'd come in at an awkward time. "What were you guys talking about?"

Melanie was about to speak, but she quickly realised that Mari couldn't speak Filipino. In fact, no-one in their camp good, which was good for the privacy she so desired. "Just sister stuff."

"Oh. Alright," Mari pretended to not be skeptical. "Well, you wouldn't believe what we scavenged today?"

"What?" Elena asked, curious.

"A radio that works. And it works pretty fucking well," Mari smiled. The sisters turned to each other and smiled too. A radio felt almost like a symbol that somewhere out there civilisation was still living, breathing and - most importantly - talking.

* * *

The radio was the attraction of the century, like an ancient relic that had been discovered or a new technology that had been invented. Those who weren't busy working were surrounding it, which was most of the camp. Adam, Ellie, Han, Alyssa, Mari, the sisters, the Motts, Eli, Maige and all of the children were crowded around it, talking excitedly and bickering over how to work it. Eli had taken charge of the situation, and was desperately trying to find some kind of station that worked. He didn't get much luck until he grew frustrated and kicked it.

It burst into life.

"Hello? Calling to all survivors..."

"Don't kick it next time," Maige scolded.

Eli hushed her before they listened to the radio's announcement. "This is the U.S department of Health and Human Services issuing warnings to all live civilians: stock up on food and water, find weapons and _stay away from cities_. The military is taking control of the situation to the best of our abilities," static began to clog up the feed, the announcer's voice crackling in and out of obscurity. "It is advised that you stay away from all the infected civilians you encounter, but we repeat, do not kill them - _do not kill them_. We are working on a cure and-"

It shut off. It was like a dark cloud had ascended over them. Even the kids knew that what they heard wasn't exactly good, and Selene caught sight of Thomas and Jareck giving each other a very particular look.

"They're spouting bullshit," Mari said bluntly. "They're not working on a cure. They were. They're just lying that the project is still going because there's already anarchy, if the remaining population panics with no hope for a cure it'll be anarchy on steroids."

"What do you mean?" Ilene glared at her, hugging her daughter close to her chest.

"All the medical facilities are down," Mari told her.

"How do you know that?" Selene grew curious.

"I have little birds that whisper in my ear," Mari told her. Everyone looked at her skeptically. "And I happened to bump into a research doctor about a week ago. He told me he was working on a cure in New York. Apparently it was an international project, they were all talking to each other. Most of the places are overrun and those that aren't are now on lockdown. It's not good."

"Fuck," Oscar cursed. Selene nudged him disapprovingly..

"Why didn't you tell us this?" Ilene immediately challenged.

"Let me handle this, honey," Jaime squeezed her hand sweetly, though Ilene snapped her hand away as if she wanted to do anything but touch Jaime, leaving her husband looking somewhat deflated. His tone was more firm, but there was a forced sweetness to it: "You and Alyssa take the kids. They don't have to hear this kind of stuff, it's too depressing for them."

"I'm staying," Chelsea said firmly.

"Why?" Ilene said.

"Because I want to know what's going on."

Ilene looked like she was going to protest, but decided against it. Jareck and Thomas were more than willing to be taken away from the boring and somewhat scary adult talk, so they voluntarily went along with Alyssa while Ilene forced her daughter away. Everybody ignored Sierra as she screamed for her father. Once the kids were away, Mari immediately put her business face on.

"I didn't tell you guys stuff for the same reason the government isn't telling everyone else," Mari emphasised to everyone else, who mumbled worriedly amongst themselves. "Apparently most of the gas, electricity and water lines are down now. This is when things get serious. I'm willing to bet millions and millions are dead now." Selene felt sick. "Shit was already serious, but it gets even more serious and we need to step up our game. Okay?"

Nobody answered, but the lack of answers were in themselves as symbol of unanimity. Chelsea was the one who seemed the least affected, strangely enough. Everybody else gave each other fearful glances. For the first time in a long time Oscar held onto Selene's arm and gave her a very concerned look. She didn't know what to say. All she knew was that she wished she were one of the children who played in the field, somewhat oblivious to the horrors of the world. Things were already bad enough. Now Mari had dropped the news that things were getting worse.

What could that mean? How _could_ things get any worse?

* * *

 _Day 36_

* * *

As usual, when the scavengers were out scavenging and everybody else was occupied by their daily chores, Ilene, Selene and Alyssa had decided to take the kids to the river after lunch. There, they would wash dishes and their clothes. Accompanying them was Maige, who just tagged along to offer some protection just in case something went horribly wrong. But it never did. The kids enjoyed playing around the river or jumping into it, and they got their chores done pretty quickly. It was one of the few times where Alyssa had seen somebody at ease.

Alyssa and Ilene sat together closely, scruggling to scrub the large pile of laundy that they had been given. Selene was helping the kids wash the dirty dishes, which brought out some kind of protest.

"Poor Selene," Alyssa sniggered when Jareck was being difficult. "Those kids are a handful."

"Tell me about it," Ilene smiled, picking up a shirt and beginning to scrub. "We have Jareck, who has ADDD or whatever they're calling it nowadays, Chelsea - who would make Wednesday Addams jealous - and then there's Thomas who is depressed." She paused. "With good reason, of course." She finished scrubbing the shirt and threw it into the pile of supposedly clean laundry. "And then there's Sierra, who has a breakdown whenever me or Jaime aren't around her," she made eye contact with her daughter who was with Selene, giving her a reassuring smile. "You know, I'd even trade places with the scavengers."

"Children are difficult," Alyssa paused. "But at least this job won't kill me."

"Really?" Ilene smiled. "The stress is getting to my heart," both her and Alyssa laughed.

"Hey? Are these Jaime's?" Alyssa said, holding some expensive jeans up. Ilene glanced at them, her face scrunching up.

"Throw them in the river or something," she said emptily, scavenging the laundry pile for something that would be easy to clean.

"That's a little mean," Alyssa eyed Ilene wearily, trying to not be too inquisitive. Alyssa realised that even though most of their little group had got on, there were lots of secrets. She was beginning to learn that firsthand, and she didn't know how she felt about it. "Why, is there something up with you and Jaime?" She asked, using the river water to scrub around the jeans with the rough sponge she held.

"I know everyone's been gossiping," Ilene said, bluntly. Alyssa opened her mouth, but decided she'd shoot herself in the foot if she confirmed or denied the true accusations. "Jaime and I have always had problems." Ilene lazily picked up some socks, scrubbing them half heartedly. "I know we acted like the golden couple, but that's because Jaime would die if anyone else knew otherwise. But I'm not so good about lying about my feelings. Things have never been good."

"Why would you marry someone if you always had problems?" Alyssa asked, feeling naive.

"Because I was stupid and shallow when I was in high school," Ilene said, forced to come to terms with her own flaws. She threw the socks into the pile and began on another pair of socks. "Jaime was the young and handsome kid, son of a multi millionaire. Me? I was just the daughter of a poor bookstore owner in New York who dreamed of writing and being published. But for some reason when we met in the bookstore there was just something there," she smiled at the memories. "I guess we were in love, once. I ditched everything for him and we married stupidly young. We had a kid stupidly young, too."

"Cute," Alyssa smiled.

"Briefly. Things went to shit after that," Ilene looked around to make sure no one was around the riverbank. Barely audible over the light sigh of the river, she whispered to Alyssa. "You won't tell anyone else this, right?"

Alyssa smiled. "You have my word."

"Well, the honeymoon period was over pretty quickly," Ilene picked up one of Mari's tank tops. "When Jaime inherited his father's business he became more reckless. He was always charming and loving with me... He still is... But I don't know. There were rumours."

"Rumours?"

"Of him getting into stupid amounts of debt. Of him taking drugs. Of him cheating on me. It was rumour after rumour after rumour. And I didn't want to face them, so I just listened and refused to act. But with every new story I heard whispered by people who saw me as some joke, my heart cracked a little more. If it wasn't for Sierra I would have left. And then there was the fact in Jaime's world I had a nice house... and prospects... which I would be leaving..." She paused. "So I devoted all my time to Sierra. I would spend every hour with the day with her, just painting, or playing piano, or reading her stories. Jaime was never home anyway. We bought a nice house by the sea, away from New York City. We'd spend time there."

"I can tell you care about Sierra a lot," Alyssa put some underwear into the pile, looking at the little girl, who was sitting on Selene's lap and watching everyone do their chores. "She's beautiful."

"She is," Ilene smiled. "I was still lonely, though. My sister helped. She would come over a lot, just to give me company. And then there was her best friend, Andreia. She... she basically saved my life and kept me sane. We'd walk along Manhattan with Sierra, or we'd feed the ducks in Central Park. Soon I was spending every second with her, and Sierra loved her too." She paused. "Sometimes she asks where Andreia is." Ilene shook her head, sighing tearfully. "And I don't know where Andreia is. I wish I knew where Andreia was because I miss her like hell."

It all clicked for Alyssa, whose face dropped slightly.

"Wait," she paused. "You and Andreia were in love... Weren't you?"

Ilene smiled tearfully. "Yeah. And Jaime caught us in bed. He was furious, the hypocrite," Ilene forcefully forced the tank top she was cleaning into a laundry pile. She rested her head in her hands, too frustrated to continue with her chores. "I should have left him that. I planned to, but by then it was too late. New York was quickly overrun by the dead and Jaime and I just grabbed Sierra and drove away. And now I don't know where my sister or Andreia are. Every day I lie awake at night just praying that they got away and lived. But I don't know."

Ilene started crying more vehemently. Hoping that Selene or the kids didn't notice, Alyssa temporarily ditched cleaning and rubbed Ilene's back consolingly. Ilene relaxed, burying her face into Alyssa's shoulder and crying into it for a few more seconds. Then, without a word, she stood up and walked back into the forest. Alyssa considered stopping her, but realised that she was having a hard time. She was in a loveless marriage and the people she cared for were gone too. Alyssa knew what it was like to have people you cared about once.

The sound of the children's laughter filled the air, somehow contrasting from the grim emotions Alyssa felt inside. She decided to tackle the pile of laundry on her own and picked up the next item of clothing, thinking contemplatively and listening to the kids' laughter and the rush of the river. Unlike everyone else, she had never felt so at home in her life.

* * *

"That was an awful joke," Wendy told Jermaine as they both walked along the perimeter of the camp. Night had descended and everybody was either asleep or in their tents. Since the panic alarm had been raised almost a week ago, the guards were expected to be extra alert and attentive just in case somebody dangerous arrived. Many people in the camp, notably Mari and Maige, now slept with guns in preparation for an upcoming attack. Wendy didn't like the way it put her on edge, but Jermaine and his bad jokes could put her at ease temporarily before she had to worry about fighting for her life. "Surely you have some good ones?"

"I know cancer jokes."

"Don't be grim, Jermaine."

"What? Do you want me to tell racist jokes?" Wendy glared at him. "I'm black, I can do it."

"It would help if racist jokes were funny," Wendy said, looking into the clearing of the forest to see if someone was there with Jermaine over her shoulder. As usual, nobody was. There hadn't been any walker activity since she had killed one almost two weeks ago. "Which they're not. At least your bad jokes have some so-bad-its-funny merit to them."

She turned, making her way away from the forest and towards the highway on the other side of camp. Jermaine followed behind her.

"That's the point, it's _ironically_ racist."

"You sound white now."

"Wendy, Wendy," he smiled. "You hurt my heart."

Wendy made her way towards the highway's large, winding roads, saying very little. Since having to work with him, her relationship with Jermaine had changed. And she didn't know how she felt about that. She saw a side to Jermaine that was funny and even - somehow - gentle and caring. And it made her like Jermaine. She felt like they'd bonded. No longer were they avoiding each other and glaring each other at every opportunity possible. They'd joke and even talk about topics that they cared about.

But no matter how hard she tried, or no matter how Jermaine acted, there was still a part inside that was inherently opposed to him. To tell the truth, she still had a big disdain for him. He was the guy who had killed Damien, after all. And though after the apocalypse she'd grown to understand why that was necessary, a part deep inside of her couldn't ever forgive him for what he did. And there was also the fact that generally he was a rude asshole. She made her way towards the highway, barely saying anything to Jermaine as he walked after her.

"Have I said something to annoy you?" Jermaine asked, scratching the back of his hand and holding a large gun with one hand. "You know, I really understand how racism sucks. I didn't mean to offend you."

"I'm not offended, please," Wendy rolled her eyes. "My grandma votes republican and has some pretty nasty views. I'm used to people saying offensive stuff. It doesn't really bother me."

"This isn't still about Damien, is it?" Jermaine said, somewhat quieter.

Wendy paused.

"Lets not talk about this," she murmured. "We have a job to be doing. We can talk about these things when we don't have to protect everyone else's life."

"That's a yes, then," Jermaine mumbled.

Wendy, once again, decided that it wasn't worth replying. If she lied Jermaine would know. If she told the truth Jermaine would either be upset to the point where she'd feel like an asshole or he himself would revert into asshole mode. She walked along the perimeter of the empty road, looking at the stretching highway that peered into the distance. She could see some tall buildings and conjectured that was Buffalo - she could even see faint orange lights around them. She knew they were flames. So this is what the military were doing in Buffalo? Didn't look like they were helping.

She brushed some hair out of her eyes, ignoring Jermaine's looming presence as she walked across the road briefly. No cars would come down it. The highway streetlights were now dead and had been for a little over a week. It was like civilisation died that little bit more with every passing day. Despite nothing too disastrous happening, she knew it was getting to her group. It was getting to her.

"I'm sorry," Jermaine said gently behind her.

Wendy turned around and looked at him, raising an eyebrow with disbelief.

"I'm sorry for what happened with Damien," he said again, avoiding her gaze but speaking with a bit more force. "I wish I didn't have to do that," Wendy was about to speak again but he spoke forcefully, halting her: "And I know that seems like a piss poor justification, but it's true. He was infected. And even if he wasn't, he was bleeding to death. I didn't want him to rise again and I know he probably wouldn't want to, either," Jermaine turned and headed back towards the field, but paused to give an afterthought. "I know how much it hurts, watching people you know and even care about die. And I'm so sorry you have to know that, too. I'll give you my condolences. But I won't apologise for saving your life."

Great. Now Wendy felt bad. She stood around the road, watching Jermaine walk away. He probably wanted her to do this, which made her not want to do it, but she decided to screw it. He walked past the dead campfire and she hurried after him, struggling under the weight of her large gun.

"Jermaine!" She called.

He paused and she caught up to him. When she saw that they were standing close to the cornfield she realised that she'd taken a journey just to talk to him. She glanced up at him briefly, trying to grasp words that didn't come.

"Look," she didn't know what to say. She wasn't ready to forgive him, but she was sick of holding him to account for something anybody sensible would've done in his position. She didn't want to cling onto this hatred she felt. "Jermaine. I'm sorry."

He wasn't crying, but he was emotional. But Wendy immediately knew his mind was on something else.

"You shouldn't be," he said, his voice breaking slightly. "Wendy, I'm a bad person."

"No..." Wendy paused.

"Yes," he stressed more firmly. "I-I've been to prison."

Wendy didn't know how to process that information. A lot of people had been to prison or been in trouble with the law at one point in their lives. Wendy had received so many fines for speeding or parking she couldn't count them on both hands.

"Jermaine, I didn't mean to reduce you to _this_ ," she smiled, holding his hand and squeezing it. "Don't be such a manchild."

He shook it away.

"You don't get it," Jermaine turned away from her. "You're right, okay? I'm an asshole." Wendy gave him a confused glare. "I went to prison because I was a bad person. I had a wife and kids and I... I beat my wife." He turned towards her, his eyes slightly damp. "Five years ago I beat the shit out of my wife. That's why I went to prison." The words were still sinking into Wendy's consciousness. In a weird kind of way, it made sense, but it still shocked her. "And I thought I've moved on from that. But I haven't."

Wendy looked like she was going to say something. Similarly, she saw Jermaine start and cease a planned sentence in a split second. She couldn't condone what Jermaine did, not ever, and she knew she should've walked away and held contempt for him like she had always done. But, stupidly or rightly, a part of her deep inside felt kind of bad for him.

Jermaine, not looking like he could take the judgement, wiped his eyes and walked away. This time Wendy didn't even look after him. When the words sank in she found herself more disgusted. From what she knew about Jermaine, about him having a family, about his temper, it really did make sense. But how could anybody ever do that? The thought of even an ass like Jermaine doing something so reprehensible - beating his wife so badly that it warrants arrest - was sickening. Despite it being a cool summer's night, she felt deeply cold inside.

The rustling of corn snapped her out of her train of thought. Or she swore she at least saw some corn rustle. She moved closer to the cornfield, peering into it but keeping a safe distance. She was so heavily distracted and would usually let it be, but with a Walker almost getting into camp and with Maige bumping into some hooded assailing she couldn't take any chances. After a good minute there was no more noise, and tentatively deciding she was safe, Wendy walked away.

She found herself crying slightly. She had no idea why.

* * *

Alyssa exhaled, relieved. That was a close call. Once she heard Wendy walk away she stood up, peering out of the cornfield and moving closer to the edge of it. She didn't hear Wendy and Jermaine's conversation, but it seemed pretty intense. It was the third incident of people in the camp all hiding secrets from each other she'd seen, and she was currently hiding with exhibit number three.

"Selene," she turned around, hissing. "Hurry up. We almost got fucking caught."

"I'm sorry," she heard Selene say loudly closer into the cornfield. "I-I barely know how to work this thing. How the hell did you convince Mari to give you one of these?"

Alyssa cleared her throat, awkwardly. "I told her that I might need one in the future just in case there's a slip up with Han."

"You and Han are...?"

"No, I'm not a slut," Alyssa said, offense in her tone. "And, for your information, Han and I aren't even official yet. I just needed an excuse to keep your secret safe."

There was another silent pause. Alyssa tapped her feet impatiently, staring into the summer's night. They needed to find a way to get to camp without Jermaine or Wendy seeing them. Mind you, they could just say they were going out to pee. In Selene's case, it was kind of true. She turned around, her tolerance faltering. At that moment Selene shoved some corn aside and put herself into view, her expression neutral.

"Is everything okay?" Alyssa said to Selene, tentatively. "Look, you can tell me..."

Selene waved the pregnancy stick in front of Alyssa, looking completely neutral. Alyssa took it from her, her heart rising into her throat. She knew that this could end up badly for Selene for a multitude of reasons. Selene looked down at her sadly whilst she shakily read the results from the pregnancy.

Oh shit.

"My mum is going to kill me," Selene burst into tears, turning away from Alyssa and covering her eyes with her hands in an attempt to slow down the waterworks. Alyssa gawped at the test for five minutes, not even to think of consoling Selene while she cried. Selene was probably too short sighted to acknowledge it right now, but she had a lot more to worry about than her parents' disapproval.

* * *

 **DUN DUN DUN.**

 **Yeah, things are not going well at all. I called this chapter 'Secrets' for a reason. And how the hell does Alyssa end up kind of knowing every one (to different degrees)?**

 **Anyhow, hope you enjoyed the chapter :)**

 _ **~Toxic**_


	8. Forgiveness

_Forgive what seem'd my sin in me;_

 _What seem'd my worth since I began;_

 _For merit lives from man to man,_

 _And not from man, O Lord, to thee._

* * *

 _Day 38_

* * *

It was Oscar's day off from scavenging again. Selene had also been given a break from looking after children. The last time they'd both been given a break together had felt like it had been forever, and both of them were in bad moods for differing reasons. Oscar, feeling some kind of guilt, decided he'd try and spend time with Selene. They sat around the campfire alone, and he tried talking to her. She just glumly stared at her hands. Oscar decided to annoy her out of her stupor, and poked her in the arms a few times with a cheeky smirk. There was still no response.

Oscar eventually decided to can it. He wanted to ask Selene what was up, but he knew what was up. The fact the world was ending was enough. They were separated from all of their family and friends, were thousands of miles away from their home country and it would affect most people to know that thousands - hundreds of thousands, even - were dying daily. When put into perspective, Oscar felt quite glum, though he tried to ignore the unpleasant facts.

"They'll be okay, you know," Oscar said to Selene softly. She looked up at him. Usually Selene cried or panicked when she was sad. Now her eyes were empty, as if she barely acknowledged him.

* * *

Maige, Alyssa and Ilene lined the children up one by one. Confusedly, the kids watched as they neatly lined up cans and bottles, placing them at different heights meticulously. Jareck thought that this was some kind of game and immediately excited. It had been a while since they had played a new game. And even so, Thomas and Chelsea had been quite boring. Thomas was very emotionally sensitive (which was understandable given what he had experienced) and Jareck was convinced that Chelsea was an imposter; an adult trapped in a child's body.

As with all other summer days, the weather was pleasant. Birdsong seeped out of the green forest and the sun illuminated the campsite and the surrounding outdoors beautifully. If camping was always like this, Jareck had decided that he wanted to just lie around and camp all day every day for the rest of his life.

"Things are difficult right now," Maige paced around the cans and bottled authoritatively, her expression resolute. "There are a lot of bad men out there who want to kill you. You need to kill them first."

"How?" Jareck asked.

Maige reached into her back pocket, taking out a small gun. "With these. Don't matter if you're a boy or a girl, big or small, young or old. If you know how to fire a gun you're safe and you have a good chance against bad guys." Ilene and Alyssa said nothing, just standing there and occasionally giving each other glances. Sierra stood next to Chelsea, tiny compared to the rest of the kids who were twice her age, but she wasn't allowed to cuddle up to her mother this time. "If anyone - _anyone_ \- comes up to you and tries to hurt you you shoot them anywhere. Though I suggest you go for the knees if they're human."

"And who isn't human?" Jareck scratched the back of his head.

"Walkers," Maige said hesitantly. "They're monsters, they look like people but they're smelly, slow and their eyes are blank. If you see any of those you shoot them in the head. It's also okay to run away from them, but you can't even let them touch you. Not ever. Get it?"

Jareck knew what Maige was talking about. Ever since Mari had picked him up in New York he'd seen them a few times. They looked like people, so he didn't know if he could shoot them even if he was sure that they were dangerous. They did look and act strangely, but they were still people, right? Jareck was immediately uncomfortable with the idea of learning how to shoot. He didn't want to hurt people. Not ever.

But he had to do as he was told. Maige was an adult, and his parents had always taught him to just do as grownups said as there was a good reason for it. Maige probably had good reason to tell him to shoot these 'monsters.' Maybe Mari would eventually tell him the same thing. Jareck had always known there was something wrong, especially after seeing the monsters in New York's streets, but he'd never expected to have to shoot them. He hoped his parents were also okay.

Then there was also Thomas, whose parents had died. Jareck felt a little bit shocked for the first time in his life. This was all beginning to make sense.

Maige walked along the line of children, handing out small guns. Jareck's was heavy in his hands, but he was physically stronger than both Thomas and Chelsea. However, Chelsea was managing to hold hers fine. When Sierra was holding a gun she almost fell to the ground like it were an anchor that dragged her deep into an abyss. Jareck tried to hold in his urge to laugh, as he didn't want to humiliate the young girl.

Maige stood next to Jareck.

"Wow," Chelsea inspected her gun. "Nice. Semi automatic pistols are my favourite."

"Okay, watch and learn, I'm going to teach you how to shoot a gun," Maige paused. "Just like how my pops taught me. First thing is first, when we're not training you've always got to be safe with your gun and keep it pointed downwards, towards the ground."

Jareck hurriedly pointed his towards the ground. As did Thomas. Chelsea seemed indifferent and Sierra barely knew what she was holding. He knew Chelsea already new how to hold a gun, so this was going to be quite fun. He wondered if Chelsea was as good as the adults.

"Guns are more complicated than you think. You don't just aim and fire. You usually have to check for ammo, but I'll teach you how to do that tomorrow," he saw Chelsea do something weird with her gun. She slid something out of it, seemed satisfied with what she saw, and slid it back into the gun. Maige didn't even notice Chelsea doing this. Jareck considered trying to imitate it, but didn't want to get into trouble with Maige. "You have to aim your gun," the kids aimed their guns shakily. "Aim it at one of the bottles or cans, of course," Maige showed her hands clearly, showing them what they were supposed to do with theirs. "You make sure your fingers aren't on the trigger guard, but extent your fingers like this," Jareck scrutinised Maige's body movements, trying to imitate them. "So they're at the side of the trigger guard."

Jareck cast a glance at Sierra, who dropped her gun. He didn't want to ask unnecessary questions, but if he didn't know what a trigger guard was he was certain Sierra didn't. Maybe she shouldn't be learning right now. Thankfully, Sierra decided it wasn't worth it too, and just sat down in the grass. Not even Maige decided it was worth arguing against. Toddlers and guns weren't a good mix, just like how Jareck and sugar wasn't a good mix.

In the movies, guns looked easy. You just aimed and fired, right? Wrong. Maige was very technical. Apparently to shoot a gun you had to stand in a certain way and even hold it in a very specific way. And then there were other skills that you needed, like the ability to aim which Jareck wasn't great at. When it came to actually holding the gun, Thomas was a little better than Jareck and Chelsea was a natural, as if she'd been raised to do it. Maige went around all three children, correcting their posture. She scrutinised Chelsea to see if there was anything to correct, but found nothing.

"Okay," Maige was done. She carefully stood at the side. "Now this is the scary part, the shooting."

"This isn't like Call of Duty," Jareck mumbled to himself. Thomas sniggered.

"Aim," Jareck tried to remember the million shooting rules and raised his gun. "And fire when I count to three. One... two..."

There was already the cracking of a gun. The force made Thomas stagger backwards, but he controlled his balance before falling. However, his shot seemed to be a signal for Chelsea and Jareck to fire. Maige looked completely panicked as Jareck pulled his trigger multiple times, shocked at the power of the gun. He hadn't managed to hit any cans or bottles, but at least he wasn't falling over.

Chelsea, however, was much more adept. Jareck knew she knew about guns, but Jareck didn't know she was a gun slinging pro. Chelsea single handedly took out everything she was supposed to hit in seconds, swinging the gun to each target with a sharp aim and obliterating it. When she was done she lowered her gun, moving her finger away from the trigger and smiling darkly at Maige.

"Maybe I should do the teaching."

"You're a kid."

"This kid shoots in professional competitions."

Maige's face went red, as if she had too much pride to admit anything. She decided to avoid it, turning to Thomas and speaking to him with barb in her voice:

" _That_ is why you keep your finger off the trigger at all times," Maige said to him. She turned to everyone, turning the mistake into a lecture which everybody was forced to endure. "If you can't remember basic gun safety, it isn't worth holding one. Because if you don't have a gun you can always turn and run, or use something else as a weapon. It's a more viable alternative than shooting yourself or someone you love."

Jareck didn't want to shoot anyone. Not even bad men. I mean, was anybody _that_ bad?

* * *

 _Day 40_

* * *

The days slowly and subtly became colder as August drew to an end and summer began shifting into autumn. Ilene would usually love autumn. She enjoyed taking Sierra to school and have the days to herself. She enjoyed the way the trees became a myriad of stunning colours. But now she didn't have a big house and civilisation behind her, all Ilene could think about was the winter. Finding supplies was going to be a hell of a lot harder, and the cold would slowly and progressively become dangerous - especially for the children. She wasn't looking forward to that.

Selene and Ilene were sitting down by the fireplace, watching the children. Since finding out how skilled Chelsea was with a gun, she'd been entrusted with her own, and it did give the babysitters of the group a much bigger break. Chelsea was probably better at defending the other kids than Ilene and Selene herself were, thanks to her family background. Turned out her parents had been gun nuts who had turned her into a shooting machine.

Ilene tore her eyes from the playing children and glanced at Selene. Selene smiled weakly at Ilene but then looked in the opposite direction. Ilene didn't know what to think of Selene; she was nice, but she'd always carried a melancholy air to her, especially in the past week or so. But who didn't? Everybody had lost something, or had something to lose. Only the children could be particularly happy right now.

"Hey," Ilene said reproachfully. "Are you okay?"

Selene smiled weakly at Ilene. "I'm coping."

"I know you don't know me much, but..." Ilene shrugged. "I don't know. If something is bothering you, you can always tell me."

"Thanks," Selene paused. "You too."

Ilene nodded at Selene, grateful. In the corner of her vision she saw something she really didn't want to see. Jaime was making his way toward her, with that same old confident gait she hated. He ran a hand through his short dark hair. Once Ilene found Jaime incredibly handsome - and he was. But now whenever she looked at him she just felt sick to her stomach.

"Hey," Jaime sat down by the girls. He turned to Selene. "Mind giving us some privacy?"

"Yeah," Selene said emptily. "I'll go check up on the kids, anyway."

Selene stood up and walked into the distance. Despite claiming to not be experienced with kids, Ilene had noted that the kids were more open with her, probably because she was less strict than the other adults. She made sure to look anywhere but towards Jaime as he sat down next to her. They sat in silence, neither knowing what to say or knowing if they even wanted to talk.

"You should be looking after Sierra."

Ilene rolled her eyes. "The girl has to have some independence, especially now. She's with Chelsea and Selene. We were watching her." She stood up, preparing to leave. "If you're so concerned you could look after her. We all know you weren't ever really present in her life," before Ilene left Jaime grabbed onto her wrist harshly. Ilene struggled, but Jaime was stronger. "Get off me!"

"Look, just hear me out, okay?"

"I don't want excuses, Jaime," Ilene snapped, finally managing to free her hand and almost stumbling. She tried to stop the waterworks but she already knew that they were failing. "What did you want, some heart to heart as we watched the sunset? This isn't a movie with happy endings. We both know that," she was borderline shouting at her husband. "We're over, Jaime."

Jaime didn't even react. His strong jaw didn't clench like it usually did. He didn't go red hot with anger. He seemed almost defeated, which Ilene almost found sad. Her husband was somebody who usually strived to get whatever he wanted, and if he wanted something he got it. But not this time. Not now.

"Do I have to repeat myself?" Ilene said quietly. "We'll pretend to be happy for Sierra's sake, we'll keep our peace to stay alive. But it's just an act." She turned around. "We're done."

Ilene turned and stormed away from Jaime. She didn't care that they were done. She didn't care if his heart was broken. She wouldn't even care if he died tomorrow. All she wanted was to live her own life. To see her sister and Andreia again. Jaime was just an irrelevance now, a dark smudge that was wiped across her past. It was sad it took an apocalypse to see that.

* * *

"Okay," Alyssa passed a wet stick to Selene, who held it lightly. She looked at the other children who were all sitting around the circle and looking at her expectantly. Somehow, Alyssa had managed to invent a game which had seized everyone's interest. Unfortunately, it was basically a version of truth or dare where you had to pass a stick around and answer a question honestly. Fortunately it seemed more mild than the kind of questions kids in college would ask when it was played with kids no older than fourteen. "It's Selene's turn to answer a question."

Selene sighed. "Okay, who wants to ask a question?"

"Have you ever met the Queen?" Jareck asked, matter of factly.

"Erm," Selene cleared her throat. "No, although I have seen Prince Phillip from a distance before..."

"Lets ask her a real question," Chelsea rolled her eyes.

"Okay, I'll ask her," Selene smiled at Alyssa. "You know when sometimes you have a secret and you're hiding it, and you know other people deserve to know the truth but it's too scary to tell?" Suddenly, Alyssa was going down a path Selene didn't want her to head down. She knew Alyssa wouldn't leak any secrets, but she wanted to avoid the topic at hand completely. "Do you think they deserve to know the truth?"

The other kids didn't seem to be onto anything, thankfully enough, though Chelsea did look a little miffed. "Yes," Selene answered hesitantly. She paused. "Yeah, I do."

"Then I've just answered your question," Alyssa smiled.

Before Selene could say anything else, Alyssa was interrupted by Ilene, who seemed to be emotional despite the neutral expression she held. She leaned down and whispered something to Alyssa, who stood up and whispered back. Selene got the impression that something had happened between her and Jaime after their _'talk.'_ She definitely did not want to be in the middle of that drama when she had enough of her own.

"Just give us a second," Alyssa smiled, turning away from Ilene who was looking anywhere but at the kids. "We need to talk."

Sierra cried for her mother as Selene expected. Selene rushed to her aid as the two other girls headed closer to the forest, holding a squirming Sierra close until she calmed down. If children were like this Selene knew she was definitely in for a long, long ride.

"Are we going to wait for the adults or what?" Jareck asked, picking up the stick. "Someone ask me a question!"

"Do you ever shut up?" Chelsea smirked at him.

"Sometimes," Jareck smiled. "My mom tells me that I should be a motivational speaker," he looked a little bit sad. "I miss her a lot. And I miss all of my friends." For a second, a glimmer of emotion hit Chelsea's features and Selene was kind of amazed. That kid probably had parents and friends out there too, Selene realised. And then there was Thomas who was an orphan, though he continued to look ahead emptily. "At least I still have Mari."

"How are you guys actually related?" Chelsea asked.

"Mari doesn't know if she counts as my aunt or my cousin, but she's my second cousin," Jareck shrugged. "I never met her much before she had to look after me. I just knew she hunts bad guys for a living." Selene's eyebrows raised. Mari's background did seem mysterious, and where did she learn to shoot like that? Did she work in law enforcement, or was she some kind of hitwoman or bounty hunter? "She came to New York to find a bad guy just as my parents left for some kind of business trip, so she looks after me now." Suspicious.

"You'll see your parents soon," Selene smiled. "You just have to do as we say, learn how to protect yourself and be good."

"You can't lie to him like that," Chelsea said snidely to Selene, glaring at her a little.

Selene glared back. "I'm not lying."

"So many people have been killed. You weren't in New York City when this whole thing broke out, I was," Chelsea said, mildly angry. "In the midst of the _riots_ \- that's what the government wanted us to believe they were, anyway - I got separated from my parents. I saw dozens, maybe even hundreds of people get killed. And I know somewhere out there my parents are likely to be one of them. My parents are practical people, they wouldn't want me risking my life for wishful thinking that could be stupid. They'd just want me to be smart and survive."

Selene didn't say anything. There was some kind of truth to Chelsea's words. Somehow, Selene saw the kids as way more honest people than a lot of the adults. What if her hope was for nothing? What if her mum and dad were both dead, and she was surviving for literally no reason? Did she have anything else going for her? Selene had always been smart, but she was never a survivor. And the fact she was pregnant certainly didn't help. She just felt as if her life was a time bomb that could explode any moment... And she didn't want Oscar to get caught in the inferno.

Sierra squirmed in her arms a little.

"You can't say that," Thomas spoke for the first time, looking at them morosely. "I saw my parents get eaten by those things. And my sister is somewhere out there and I _know_ she's alive. I couldn't just leave her. I couldn't do that to them. Just because she might be dead doesn't mean I can just give up on her..."

Selene decided it wasn't worth going into that territory. The talk of death and despair was way too depressing for kids, and for some reason all of the children seemed more focused on it than the adults.

"Why don't we talk about something else?" Selene said naively.

"Whatever," Chelsea surrendered, looking at her feet. "Looks like it's Sierra's turn to answer a question."

* * *

 _Day 42_

* * *

Wendy lay in her tent thinking contemplatively. Since Jermaine had come clean about his past her feelings had been even more mixed. She wished she could not care about it, but she did. Jermaine had made things complicated. One second she thought he was a decent guy and the next... she had no second what to believe. She'd stubbornly refused to believe Jermaine was a good man, once. But when she was forced to come to her senses he just had to drop the bombshell and forced her to realise that maybe her initial, flawed judgement wasn't so flawed afterall.

She could try and come up with reasons why he did what he did. She knew from experience that alcoholism, drug abuse and mental illness fucked you up a lot. She knew that Jermaine probably had a temper which his ex-wife had one day stomped all over. Maybe she even struck him first. But no matter what justification she came up with it _wasn't_ enough. And she felt bad for ever liking him or thinking he was a good person.

But what do you do about that? She didn't have to be friends; she just had to work with him, for both of their sakes. But did Jermaine even deserve to survive? He'd gone to prison.

Wendy tried not to think about it. She rolled over it the tent, hearing the pouring rain splatter against the thin material. It had been two weeks since it had rained, which was apparently a pretty decent length of time for New York. She was going to miss August.

Just on cue, Wendy leaned up to see Selene slip into the tent. Her raven hair was dripping wet. Her contemplative eyes were briefly wide. Wendy silently threw Selene a dirty towel and watched Selene scrub herself dry.

It had been a while since Wendy and Selene had talked. Weeks, in fact. Despite being quite close when they were cooped up in Selene's father's apartment all those days ago, and despite sharing a tent with each other since, Wendy and Selene had definitely drifted apart. They'd both been caught up in the social order of the camp. Wendy only really talked with Eli and Jermaine, and Selene only really talked with the other babysitter girls. Selene probably barely talked to her own brother. It was weird how the demands of life could tear people away from each other so easily and mercilessly.

"Where's Jermaine?" Selene asked.

"He's on duty. In this weather. Poor guy," Wendy didn't convey it, but she didn't want to be reminded of Jermaine's existence when Jermaine's existence was the plague of her own existence. Never mind the fact that she had a family who were out there somewhere, alive and in distress or dead, she was worried about some wife beating asshole. "What about Oscar?"

"He's on duty, him, Mari, and Jaime haven't come back," Selene bit her bottom lip slightly.

"Don't worry about it," Wendy smiled. "They're probably being careful in the rain."

"Good point," Selene slumped on top of her sleeping bag, but didn't lean into it. Despite the darkness, Wendy could see her face quite well. She leaned up a little and Selene smiled at her. "I feel like we haven't talked for ages."

"I know, right?" Wendy laughed. "I've been surrounded by two Byronic heroes. Except they're not romantic enough to be Byronic, and..." She paused, saying it more to herself. "I'm beginning to doubt they're heroes."

"Nobody is a hero here. Just a survivor."

"Don't be depressing," Wendy frowned.

"It's true," Selene's eyes somehow became darker than the night. "And Mari is some kind of hitwoman, or assassin or something. Someone who capitalised on killing people." Wow. That was quite the revelation. "Is it no coincidence that she's the best survivor of the group? We saw what happened to Joe. He was a hero, he gave his life for Oscar. Do you not think that good people are now dead people?"

Wendy paused. There was truth to that, really. But she was alive and she liked to think she was a relatively decent person. Maybe that meant she'd die, and she knew she didn't want to be dead either. Maybe she'd have to make a choice. That was scary.

"I'm a good person," Wendy said with a voice of iron. "And you are too."

Selene only smiled weakly in response, as if she appreciated Wendy's words but didn't believe them.

"But..." Wendy halted for a second, Selene turning to her once again, genuinely interested in what Wendy had to say. Wendy kept revisiting her train of thought like it were a photo album. "Good people can do bad things. Or bad people can be good. And good people can be bad, right?" Selene shrugged a little bit. "And if a good person tells you about something bad they did, maybe you can forgive them, right? I mean, they'd want you to forgive them?"

"I'd want to be forgiven," Selene said, as quiet as the sound of the rain pattering atop them. Wendy slumped back, staring up at the roof of the tent. "I'd really, really want to be forgiven."

Wendy knew what she had to do.

* * *

 _Day 43_

* * *

It had been a long time since anybody in the group had eaten pancakes. Even Jermaine hadn't had pancakes for years. The last time he had them his wife made them for him and the kids, back when she cooked. The memories of his broken and battered marriage were purposely hazy and vague for Jermaine, but he remembered the pancakes being delicious and tasting of the happiness he'd once felt.

Adam sniggered when Ellie tried flipping one of the pancakes and it fell into the mud, but Han sagely reminded them that they couldn't afford to be wasting something, especially luxuries which they could never eat again.

Ellie, however, attempted to flip one of the pancakes one last time. When she succeeded, everybody surrounding them had cheered.

"Usually I'd have nutella with my pancakes," Alyssa said off handedly next to Jermaine.

"Yeah? I liked peanut butter with mine."

"Peanut butter? Really?"

"You should try it one day," he smiled.

Alyssa just smiled in response. When Ellie came out to her with a hot pan, scooping a meagre looking pancake onto Alyssa's plate. Despite being small and thin, it did smell delicious.

"I bet you're glad it's your day off," Alyssa said, picking up the pancakes and eating from it with her bare hands. Jermaine would have found it gross a month ago; to eat from your hands - and hands that were mildly dirty - wasn't exactly hygienic. But they didn't have much cutlery, and when supplies were so low who really cared anyway?

"We're making sure Wendy and Eli get a pancake too, if someone is willing to deliver them," Ellie smiled, glancing at Alyssa. "Is that nice?"

She mumbled in response, barely able to talk over a mouthful of pancake.

Ellie just chuckled, making her way back towards the lit fire where Adam was struggling to crack an egg. Jermaine's stomach growled mildly as he kept detecting the scent of pancake batter. Alyssa was too busy eating to talk, though Jermaine realised he didn't talk to her much anyway. He didn't talk to anyone. He was surrounded by strangers. He didn't know anyone beyond a first name basis. The family of three sitting close by, Maige, Han and the couple opposite were all strangers. Beyond a very brief list of adjectives to describe what he knew of their personalities and their name, he knew nothing.

But then again, since leaving prison he'd gotten close to very few. Since getting anger management, he'd been terrified of forming relationships again, and a tight restraining order had meant that he'd never had the opportunity to reconnect with the people he loved. With the exception of a few bar crawls with co-workers, Jermaine had spent his life lonely. And while he was still lonely, it was ironic that it was following a world slaughter and the potential death of millions was the time where he'd get the most interaction. Almost like every time he cared for something he was surrounded by violence - usually at his own hand.

After making sure Sierra had been given extra helpings, Ellie made her way over to Jermaine.

"There isn't much," she said, scrambling for a plate to put the small pancake on. "I know you're a big guy, but, well there'll be dinner late-"

Jermaine didn't have time to think of a response. He felt something smash into his head and he went sprawling forwards, a plate smashing beside him. Alyssa gave a squeak next to him and Sierra's crying was immediately heard. Jermaine rolled over on the grass, groaning. Before he could respond he saw a boot hurdling his way. Reacting quickly, he rolled over, almost forcing himself into the cooking fire.

"Mari, what the hell?" He heard Ellie scream.

Jermaine grabbed Mari's foot before she attempted to stomp on his face again. He clung tightly onto her, but she was a lot stronger than he had anticipated. She forced himself out of his grip and immediately reached for a gun.

Checkmate.

Jermaine raised his arms in defeat, feeling blood ooze out of his head. He didn't even know what the fuck was going on.

"You may be a big guy Jermaine," Mari struggled to speak under panting breaths. "But I'm not someone who doesn't fight back. I've beaten bigger boys than you," the gun trembled in her hands for a second.

"What the fuck woman, if you wanted the pancake you should've asked for the fucking pancake!" Jermaine shouted. Judging by Mari's facial expression, she didn't appreciate the attempt of humour.

"You think just because your wife took your bullshit I would take it too?"

Jermaine suddenly went that bit limper.

She knew.

But how?

Maige had decided to intervene, she tried to grab the gun from Mari but Mari refused to let anyone near it. "Mari, what the hell? What's happened?" Mari's gaze didn't leave Jermaine for a second. Her eyes were alive with hatred. "Mari?"

"This _fuck_ was a wife beater," Mari said. Her voice was quiet, but everyone a mile away picked up on her word. "Eli overheard him talking to Wendy about it. I'm happy to tolerate having lots of different people in the group, but when I find out someone beat his wife to a pulp that's when they cross the line." She kept the gun's aim square at Jermaine's forehead. Jermaine was terrified and felt vulnerable for the first time in his life, and he'd been in close fights before.

"Please," Jermaine stressed.

"Scared?" Mari smirked. "I figured you would be. Men like you are the worst cowards when someone stands up to you."

"Lets just take a breather," Ellie said. Jermaine saw Adam was standing with her from the corner of his eyes, partially shielding her with the anticipation that violence would soon break out.

"He beat women!" Mari snarled. "Do you guys not know how serious that is?"

"Okay, but maybe we're saying that pointing a gun at the guy's forehead isn't going to solve things," Maige said coolly.

"I'll give him ten seconds to try and run away. And then I'll shoot."

"Mari," Maige reprimanded.

There was a silence for two seconds. Jermaine's gaze kept moving between the different faces, witnessing a kaleidoscope of emotions. Mari was simmering with rage, Han somehow remained neutral, Maige looked contemplated and everybody else who had joined them for breakfast were plain scared. Eventually he heard light footsteps making themselves towards the group - more spectators to see Jermaine get humiliated.

Wendy made her way towards Mari and shoved her off Jermaine lightly, which was funny when you considered that Mari towered over Wendy. Mari didn't fight back, but kept her aim fixed on Jermaine as Wendy kneeled by his side, looking down at his face slightly.

She turned to Mari.

"Why the fuck is he bleeding?"

"You know why, Wendy," Mari snapped. "He told you what he did and you never told any of us? I'm glad you were eavesdropped on."

"It wasn't any of your business," Wendy snapped.

"This is all of our business now!"

"So is it my business that you killed people?" Wendy said coldly. Judging by Mari's reaction, Jermaine was worried that she'd turn her aim on Wendy. But she didn't. She just stiffened and loosened, trembling with anger. "Jareck's made it clear that you were hardly Mother Theresa before the outbreak either, Mari. And nobody is aiming a gun at you and proclaiming you a danger."

"I didn't hurt innocents."

"Has he hurt an innocent?" Wendy asked. When Mari didn't reply, Wendy turned to everyone in the group in turn and shouted louder, challenging anyone to contradict her: "Well, has he? No he hasn't. Because that was the past and he's beyond that now. We're all beyond the past. In fact, as much as we hate to admit it the past is _dead_ ," something about that stung Jermaine. It would've hurt everyone to hear that everything they held dear bar the people they brought to camp was now gone... but maybe it was true. Maybe for Jermaine the past had been dead for a while. "All that matters is what we do now. Because we're a team and we have been for a month, and if we're going to fuck our survival up because some of us were bad then go ahead and point the gun at yourself first," Wendy stood up and stared Mari right in the face. "And maybe after you and Jermaine are done I could follow suite, because I was a bad person too."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"What? I was a junkie. I stole from people to get my fix. It's behind me now, just like how it's behind Jermaine, but I did fucked up shit." Wendy inhaled. "So if you're going to make Jermaine leave, I suggest we all leave."

Mari dropped her aim away from Jermaine. She glared at Wendy for a second with both resent and admiration. Then she slipped the gun into her weapon belt and spat at Jermaine's feet.

"He lays a finger on anyone and he dies," she snarled, storming towards her tent.

"I'll shoot him myself," Wendy said firmly. Mari halted, then continued.

Jermaine hadn't even noticed that he was bleeding lightly from his nose. He leaned up, finally being able to breathe for the first time in five minutes. He wiped the blood from his sleeve and looked at everybody, who didn't dare utter a word. It was obvious they'd seen something by the facical way they acted as if nothing had happened. They purposely didn't look towards Jermaine, bar Maige, who was giving him a curious look as if she didn't know what to make of him.

Even Wendy, the person Jermaine thought would keep defending him, was walking away from him as quickly as possible. He watched her walk, feelings of regret and humiliation stinging him much more than the dull but painless cut of loneliness.

* * *

 **Sorry for the late update. Got a random bout of writer's block, probably to compensate for the prior burst of inspiration I've had the past couple of months. (So yes, COBC readers that story is probably going to be late too...)**

 **Also, this chapter was unashamedly Selene and children centric. xD I only just noticed.**

 **Bah** , **I just realised I did my first messy British-ism by making Eli say 'sweetshop' instead of 'candy shop (or store?)' Americans! Slap me on the wrist whenever I do this! Unless Americans do say sweetshop. Hm. Do they?**

 **Also - on Jermaine's past, which is going to be a little bit explored later - I want to make it clear I'm not condoning domestic violence/violence against women. I'm just trying to explore it from different perspectives, and obviously there are moral nuances. I'm trying to portray Jermaine as a sympathetic character - or a flawed human - whilst making it clear that what he did is wrong and is never justifiable. So if anyone is upset, please don't be, please?**


	9. Linger

**I'm super sorry if the quality of writing at the end of this chapter is bad. Those on the forums know that I accidentally deleted the end of the chapter and had to basically re-write it, and re-writing things is possibly the most draining thing in existence.**

 **Also, this chapter wasn't edited. Sorry about that too. If anyone wants to pick out any bits or bobs typo wise I can correct tomorrow, I'd love that.**

 **But yeah, other than that hitch, this was my favourite chapter to write - I'm twisted like that.**

* * *

 _Day 44_

* * *

Once Mari woke up, she didn't even make her way to breakfast. She instead made her way towards the forest, wanting to avoid the rest of the group. Since her confrontation with Jermaine yesterday, she felt sickened. She didn't want to see Jermaine's face. Looking into the face of a wife beater was enough to make her sick, but there was something Wendy had said. She didn't know what it was, but it had shaken her deep inside, and she just wanted to be alone. She made her way to the edge of the forest, multiple guns strapped to her.

She passed Oscar, who was holding a few logs of firewood.

"Hey, kid," she patted his shoulder as he passed her and he turned to face her normally. They were about level in height, their eyes directly facing each other. "We're going to give up the scavenge today. You know, we have plenty of supplies and I guess right now not many of us are prepared for being in mortal danger."

Oscar smiled, relieved. "Cool. Anything I can do?"

"Just help Maige around if you can," she predicted Oscar's negative reaction, though he didn't say anything. "I know she's got this grudge against you. I know it's hard being around her after..." She cleared her throat, avoiding the unpleasant memory. "But she'll come around. I mean, she'll never get over it, but she'll come around and forgive you. And you'll see what a great girl she is."

"Thanks," Oscar just smiled, avoidant. He walked away as if his life depended on it leaving Mari feeling stranded and somehow more isolated than she had felt before.

She made her way to the edge of the forest, leaning against a tree and looking back at the camp. She could see the children playing not so far away while the adults huddled around the campfire as usual, eating breakfast. They were people she'd have never expected to talk to, once. They were all too dark, or too sweet. Even Maige, someone she worked well with and had an infinite amount of respect for, wouldn't have been her friend had they met before shit happened. Maige seemed too uptight for Mari.

Because Mari kept on a front for the group. The front of someone who had everything together. Mari knew she was tough, she knew she had what it took to survive - something most of the others had to learn. But just because she was tough didn't mean she was a strategist, or somebody who could unite a group of strangers. Somebody patient, tolerant or thoughtful. She pretended she was, but that's all it was; pretend. Pretending didn't create realities, as much as everybody wished it could.

"Someone looks like they've swam through shit creek," Eli commented, seemingly coming out of nowhere. Mari turned to face him. He'd managed to snag a leather jacket from one of his wanders through the forest. "What's gotten to you?"

Everybody had changed in the past month and a half. Their faces became more wise, weary, sad or strong. But somehow Eli had remained constant and fixed, both in his features and his manner. Mari wasn't sure if she envied that or not.

"What did you snag from the forest today?" She asked bluntly.

"Gum," Eli held some out. "Want some?"

"I haven't brushed my teeth for like three weeks, hit me," Mari held out her hand. Eli slipped a wad out between two fingers and handed it over to Mari, who gratefully unwrapped the gum and began chewing on it.

"You know, you can't avoid questions, not with me," Eli said after a few seconds. "What's up?"

Mari turned back to the camp, staring into the distant fire. Eli's gaze also turned to the fire, which Oscar was trying to revitalise by adding an extra log or two. She wondered if this was what Eli did when he hung around the outskirts of the camp - just watch the group from afar, a bunch of screwed up survivors who had a doubtful future ahead. Every smile, every meeting of eyes... it all seemed to mean something, when you saw it from a distance.

Mari folded her arms over her chest. She didn't know if she could trust Eli with her life or not. There was something about him she trusted - in some ways, he was more of a confidante than Maige was. And yet there was something inherently untrustworthy about him.

"The Jermaine thing is really bugging me."

She saw Eli react, possibly the first time she'd ever seen him react. His eyebrow raised.

"You know, you should give him a chance," he smirked. "He's not a bad guy. He did bad shit, but he's a good guy."

"Why did you tell me his secret then?" Mari almost spat her gum out with rage.

Eli acknowledged her coolly. "Because there are enough secrets in this group."

"Oh, so it's not you trying to get into Wendy's pants?"

Eli snorted.

"You really think that of me?"

"You have a dick."

He smirked. "Well, I'm not interested in Wendy."

Mari scanned the area for Wendy, she couldn't see her.

"Well, I would."

"Good for you," Eli laughed. "Did it turn you on when she stood up to you?"

"Totally," Mari rolled her eyes, the sarcasm dripping from her voice. "You must _really_ want me to punch you in the dick." She paused. "Jokes aside, I don't know if I can do this. Everyone sees me as an authority for everything. As some saviour. And I'm not, Eli," she knew he was going to disagree, but she interrupted him. "I'm just some screwed up girl who makes money out of hurting or capturing people. Now I'm the one who has to save lives and keep people together, when taking lives and keeping people apart is what I'm good at. And things have gone okay the past month but what if it gets tough? And when the winter hits and finding supplies gets harder? What am I supposed to do?"

"You'll find out," Eli paused.

"That's the thing. I hope I don't have to find out."

* * *

Wendy peered into the tent where Jermaine was curled up, half asleep. With some disgust she noticed that there was some saliva pooling out of his mouth. She knew he was awake but pretending to sleep, and she understood why he'd want to hermit himself away from the rest of the group. Hell, since yesterday's drama everybody had been giving _her_ weird looks that she didn't want. She couldn't imagine how they'd treat Jermaine. He'd be a pariah now, and he'd be greeted with worse than violence: he'd be greeted with indifference, forced loneliness.

"It's your turn to guard," Wendy said reproachfully. Jermaine groaned and she smirked. He sucked at acting. "And I know you weren't sleeping."

Jermaine leaned up quickly, glaring at her.

"No way."

She didn't say anything, she just gave him a stern look and put her hands on her hips, immediately quelling Jermaine's defiance. There was an awkward silence and Jermaine stood up, heading towards the exit of the tent.

"I guess I'll get my gun and do my job," he grumbled, having to bend down slightly lest his head brush against the tent ceiling. Wendy blocked the exit slightly, glancing at Jermaine.

"Look, we need to talk," she sighed. "About everything. I defended you and I think... I think I deserve to hear what you did, from your perspective," she bit her lip slightly, worried at Jermaine's reaction - or a lack thereof. "And I'm more well prepared this time. I'm not going to run away," she sighed before Jermaine talked. "And please, _please_ don't try to justify it. Because we know that kind of shit can't be justified. I just want the truth."

"My wife was called Candace," Jermaine smiled, before descending and sitting on the soft tent floor. Wendy decided to follow suite, remaining eye contact with him as she sat down, feeling the cold floor beneath. "We met in college. She was smart and beautiful and... It started off well," Jermaine smiled. "I guess I thought it was the perfect marriage. Until shit happened."

"What kind of shit?" Wendy asked.

"Debt, money worries, emotional distance, all kinds of shit," Jermaine shrugged. "I wish I could say something happened that made me snap. But I just became darker. I'd always been too possessive over Candace for my own good. I didn't like it when she went out on the town in short skirts, or when she called other guys 'honey' and 'darling' the way she did. I guess my love for her wasn't as healthy as it felt." Jermaine sighed. "I didn't realise I was controlling, but I was. But it was never violent. Not ever. Until I lost my job.

I turned to drinking, which was a bad idea in itself. Candace would keep working, but it didn't fix our issues. She got mad, but one day she gotten even more mad than usual. She struck me once across the cheek," Wendy opened her mouth to talk, but Jermaine interrupted her. "And I _know_ that isn't an excuse. I shouldn't have. And I hit way harder."

"How hard?" Wendy asked, a little horrified.

"Hard enough to make her not want to go to work the next day because she wanted to avoid the awkward questions. She should've left at that point. But she was loyal, and she loved me... I think she loved me, once," Wendy felt disgusted with herself for feeling sorry for Jermaine. Even if he wasn't lying and he had improved, his actions would always be a stain on his history. They weren't justifiable - Jermaine knew that - but she still couldn't see him as anything but vulnerable. "Because I did it again and again. I don't know why. I couldn't control myself and that was the instinct. When my temper got the best of me, or when I'd drank too much, the first thing I wanted to do was hit her. It eventually got worse and worse, and I eventually found myself feeling less and less shame afterwards. Sometimes, I'd even hit her in front of the kids.

And then one time it got so bad she wouldn't respond. I... That was when it struck me that I'd done something very, very bad," Jermaine became fidgety and Wendy knew his thought process was becoming less and less coherent. "She used to hit back, and I thought that made it more reasonable to hit her back... This time, she didn't. My kids tried to call an ambulance, I didn't want them to... I told them that she tripped down the stairs... But they knew..." He wasn't crying, but he'd gone paler and he was wiping his eyes with the back of his hands. "She told them everything."

"Jermaine," Wendy felt like she shouldn't have done it, but she wrapped her arms around the back of his neck and held him into her. He burst into tears at that moment and she stared into the background. To see a six-foot-four guy sob like a baby was very humanising. It made her realise that nobody was quite as strong or perfect as she thought.

* * *

Eleana sat next to Melanie, smiling at her pretty faced sister. Everybody else seemed kind of absent, and after breakfast even Adam and Ellie had retreated from their usual spot by the campfire and were huddled up in their tent. But Melanie sat there, staring into the distance with her head perched in her hands. She seemed lost in thought, briefly.

"Guess what?" Eleana said to her sister in Filipino. "I have officially lost weight! Looks like this whole barely having enough nutrition to go by each day thing works, right?" She was trying to be jokey - though the weight loss did appease her vainer side - though her sister did not seem happy with her comments, and just gave her a serious look. "What's up, Mel?"

"I've just been thinking about the Jermaine thing," Melanie shrugged. "I can't believe that stuff happens to other people. I mean-"

Eleana suddenly went into serious mode. "I told you not to talk about him, Melanie. We're beyond that. Both of us."

"Do you really think that our past is dying just because everybody else is?" Melanie looked around edgily. "Look, Eleana, I _know_ you killed him but I'm still having nightmares and I can't get them out of my head. What if Jermaine is dangerous, what if he hurts us? We know what men like him can do..."

Eleana shuffled closer to her sister, moving her arm around her sister's shoulder and hugging her tight. She felt through Melanie's soft hair, sighing and trying to think of a way to calm her sister.

"Jermaine is a scumbag, there's no other way about it," Eleana said. "But he's not going to hurt you. We have Mari keeping him on a leash and he's not going to get repeat his past mistakes unless he's really stupid," she moved away from Melanie, gently tilting her sister's chin so their dark eyes looked into each other. "And if he does, he'll regret it. You know those scavenging missions I've been doing?" Eleana reached into her coat pocket, taking out a small gun. "Turns out I'm now a pretty great shot. A bullet is always stronger than muscle."

"You're right," Melanie smiled. Eleana tried to move away but tightly grabbed her sister's hands. "I love you."

Eleana smiled. It was the first smile in a while that didn't seem to have any pretence to it.

"I love you too. And I'm not going to let anybody - or anything - hurt you."

Both girls smiled at each other again, feeling a connection they hadn't felt for a long time. Melanie heard footsteps behind Eleana and peeked to see who was there. As Eleana also peered over her shoulder they both saw Mari heading their way. Melanie liked Mari, and knew her pretty well, so she was surprised to see how stressed out Mari looked; her usually resolute face was anything but resolute. It was stressed, even.

"Hey girls," Mari smiled. "Look, um, I kind of need you Eleana."

"Oh?" Eleana switched to English again. "How can I help?"

"Ilene is planning to take the kids to the lake to play," Mari rolled her eyes. "Look, I don't think it's a necessity, but Ilene pointed out that it's almost fall so they won't be able to play in the river for a whole year, or something. I just go along with her, but while they do whatever they want to do, they need someone to tag along with them who knows how to handle a gun," she smiled. "Wendy and..." she refused to even mention Jermaine. "Seem occupied, and Eli is the only one who seems to be guarding the actual camp. You don't mind tagging along, right?" Eleana looked hesitant. "Mel can go, too."

"Yeah," Eleana shrugged. "What's the worst that could happen?"

* * *

"Where did you find these?" Selene asked as she watched Ilene put inflatable armbands around Sierra, who was also conveniently dressed up in a swimming costume.

"I brought them," Ilene smiled. "When Jaime and I ran away we didn't pack anything up, we already had cases packed with holiday stuff. Thankfully Sierra already had a swimming costume and armbands, and you know, I didn't want to put them to waste. Civilisation isn't dead enough to have a little fun, right?"

Selene didn't want to voice her disagreement. Sure, it had been forever since a Walker had even stumbled across their camp, and the military were - to the best of her knowledge - still kind of operational. But that didn't mean that there is no threat. She felt like the moment they let their guard down would be the moment bad things happened, especially if they weren't armed.

At that moment, she was approached by Oscar and the Filipino sisters. She'd never really interacted with the Filipino girls much, so she wasn't surprised to see them acknowledge her with little enthusiasm. She smiled at Oscar, who only gave her a weak shrug in response.

"Why're you tagging along?" Selene asked.

"Considering I'm one of the few who can work a gun Mari found it necessary," Oscar told her. Selene frowned.

"You spend a month in America and you're already firing at things."

Oscar smiled. "Right now, firing at things is a skill I'll consider handy."

Selene turned towards the forest which they would venture down. She hugged herself lightly, the wind nipping through her thin layer of clothing.

"I dunno," Selene paused. "This doesn't exactly feel right, does it? How could you shoot anything that walks and looks vaguely like a person?" She shook her head, biting her bottom lip a little. "We know they're infected, but what if they're alive?"

Ilene was blowing into Sierra's inflatable armbands, oblivious to the siblings' conversation. Eleana readied her gun whilst Melanie tried to pretend that she wasn't listening to some kind of moral dilemma.

"Han said they're not."

"I guess you're right," if there was any moment to tell Oscar what she was hiding, now was it. Her stomach was beginning to get more prominent and she was suffering from morning sickness. Pregnancy - eventually - wasn't something that could be hidden well. She had to come clean about it eventually, lest Oscar find out some other way and something bad happen. "Look, there's something I really need to tell you. Mind if we have a chat?" She glared at Melanie, hoping it would put the Filipino girl off from potentially eavesdropping. "A _private_ chat?"

Oscar looked confused. It was the look he usually held when he contemplated what he had done to earn his family's contempt. He scratched the back of his head, trying to look calm.

"Yeah, we'll chat later."

Selene forced a smile, as if she wasn't going to drop the news that she was pregnant at the most inconvenient time possible. She didn't know how Oscar would react. He was hardly a beacon of perfection, but he could possibly have a reaction that would make her parents look tame. But he _was_ nonchalant. But she was angry at herself in this situation, so how could she expect Oscar to be okay with it? There was a stench of uncertainty. Selene didn't know what to expect, but all stenches were unpleasant.

* * *

It had been a while since Sierra had seen her mom so happy. Sierra knew that there had been problems for a long time. People didn't expect kids to pick up on these things, but they did. Sierra knew that there was something bad that had happened which had led her mom and dad to leave home. She knew that her mom and dad were definitely having some pretty severe personal issues. She didn't know what it was, and she didn't know if she wanted to find out, but there was _something_.

So it was nice to feel that something go away. Her mother was smiling regularly for the first time in history and they were going to swim together. Eventually, they were even joined by Jareck, Chelsea and Thomas, who were all watched over by the kind faced Alyssa.

"Mari had swimming trunks for Jareck," Alyssa explained, before glancing at Thomas who was wearing shorts that draped down to his ankles. "Thomas had to, um, borrow something of Jareck's. It's not the best fit."

"Oh, what about you Chelsea?" Ilene smiled down at the little girl. "You don't have anything to swim in."

"I'll pass," Chelsea smiled. "Not a fan of swimming, anyway."

"Oh, alright. Well, everyone else is going to bring a change of clothes. If you _really_ want to swim..." She paused, realising that she'd never changed Chelsea's mind before. She was doubtful that she'd changed it again, so she turned back to Sierra, patted her armbands to make sure that they were sufficiently inflated, and then turned towards the forest, smiling at everyone. "Okay, who is ready to have some fun?"

"Me! Me! Me!" Sierra jumped up and down. Jareck seemed similarly enthusiastic. As usual, Thomas and Chelsea looked around miserably.

* * *

Ilene's plan did seem to work - insofar that it seemed to perk Thomas up. The water was cold, but summer had died with a passion and left a sweltering heat in its wake, meaning that most of the kids were perfectly happy to handle the icy cold water. The boys played with Sierra's inflatable beach ball, throwing it to each other, and Thomas seemed to actually smile. Sierra sat on her mother's lap on the bank, splashing her feet in and giggling to herself.

"I don't think this was a bad deal after all," Alyssa said to Ilene. "Thomas has played with the kids, but he hasn't been so happy... ever." She paused. "Do you think he'll ever be over this?"

"I don't know, I can't imagine Sierra having to go through life without me," Ilene paused. "Or even Jaime. Jaime is a lot of things, but a bad father isn't one of them." Sierra pretended to not be interested in the conversation, pushing herself off the river bank and into the shallow water. The weak current didn't drag her off, but her mother still leaned forwards and grabbed onto her until she could be sure her daughter was safe. Sierra's armbands kept her afloat, so her mother eventually let her go. "I'm just so glad that I'm rid of him."

"Breakups sound rough," Alyssa sighed. "I know that if I ever have to say goodbye to Han, it'd be like a stab to the gut. And we're not even dating yet. In fact, maybe we never will. How are you holding up?"

"I feel free. I just need to find Andreia," Sierra splashed around in the water, giggling to herself, before freezing. Aunt Andreia. Her mom's close friend. Sierra missed Andreia, and it had been a while since she had even heard her mother say Andreia's name. She continued splashing around, enjoying herself, whilst simultaneously eavesdropping on Alyssa and Ilene's conversation. "When I do, assuming all this shit has gone down, we'll go back to the beach house or somewhere. It'll be sad to leave this group but... Well, you understand. It's probably safe in the beach house, too."

"Maybe that isn't the right way about things."

Sierra didn't want to leave her dad. She stopped playing, though it was obvious the adults didn't think there was anything wrong. The tears converged with the wetness that was already across her face. Suddenly the cold water seemed ten times colder. Sierra rushed away from her mother, wanting nothing to do with this. She didn't care about their parents' drama. They'd stuck together before, despite everything. Couldn't they do that again?

She used the armbands to support her weight as she kicked and splashed forwards, furiously passing a confused Jareck and Thomas when she purposely whacked their inflatable ball away. She heard her mother call after her, sounding angry, but she didn't care. She just wanted to swim away. Swim to the emotion. Maybe if she was lucky she could become a mermaid there.

Suddenly, something solid found itself around Sierra's ankle.

She turned around to see who had grabbed her, but the other kids and adults had congregated around the bank and were shouting after her. They were a while away. And something had grabbed onto her.

Sierra screamed as something dragged her under the shallow, though the noise was drowned out as quickly as the air she breathed.

* * *

Oscar looked like Selene had struck him across the face. Hard. One second she was fidgeting around and trying to talk to him, the next she'd dropped the news on him that she was pregnant. At first Oscar hadn't reacted, as if she had made an offhand comment about the weather. And then the word sunk in. Pregnant. And then when that soaked in the realisation of what could come, and what had happened, had hit Oscar and he found himself staring into a void while Selene looked at him expectantly. Maybe she was even hopeful, but Oscar himself knew that hope was in vain.

"What?" Oscar finally said, caressing his cheek with his hand as if he were nursing the metaphorical blow.

"I'm pregnant," Selene repeated, looking around the forest nervously. "Look, Oscar-"

"What do you mean you're pregnant?" Oscar said, still confused even though he knew the answers to his questions.

Selene blushed, not wanting to give any intimate details with her brother. "Well, it means I've got a baby inside me," she felt juvenile. Oscar looked neutral, and she guessed that was better than anger; she wasn't exactly expecting him to be overjoyed. She started talking quickly and defensively: "Look, I don't _want_ this baby, I'm hardly in the position to have one," she found herself crying for the millionth time. "I know that. A-And when we find some kind of facility, I'm going to get rid of it. It was a stupid mistake and I'll fix it-"

"Fix it?" Oscar's coolness heated up into frustration. "There aren't airports. Cities have been converted into war zones. The only safe place we've found around here is a field and forest in the middle of fucking nowhere, and I bet that's not safe. You're thousands of miles from home. You're in University, you're young? What the fuck do you think you're going to do?"

"I don't know, _something_ ," Selene grabbed on her hair, pacing around and resisting the urge to pull her own hair out. She found it hard to breathe again as she progressively grew even more upset. "I always figure something out."

"You've never been pregnant before," Oscar said dryly, trying to stop his frustration from turning into rage. "What the fuck were you thinking?"

"I didn't know all of this was going to happen, ok?" Selene snapped at him.

Oscar was taken aback by Selene's outburst. If she wanted to play angry, he could easily retort with fury. He felt his angered heartbeat rise to his temple. "Right, because even if the dead weren't walking around you being pregnant would be wonderful? Because we really needed a new addition into this fucked up family while you were preparing for your career? While you were moving to and from the U.S and England all the time? While mum was struggling with money and you didn't have much for yourself with your costly tuition? Who is the dad?"

"Why, you going to kill him or something, assuming he isn't dead?" Selene said snidely.

"Something along those lines."

Selene's laugh was filled with venom, contrasting sharply from the tears that still glittered her face. "Well you're going to have a difficult time considering I don't even know his fucking name!"

"Wh-" Oscar paused. "Seriously?"

Selene sniffled, then wiped around her eyes. She nodded.

"Okay," Oscar knew it wasn't right of him to be angry, but he was furious. He tried to collect himself even though he wanted nothing better than to shout at Selene - he'd had his fair share of flings too. "And you were stupid enough to not use _anything_? Because I know I would've. And now look where we are. How the fuck are we going to cope with you like... like this!"

"Oh, because you're so fucking perfect Oscar?" Selene shouted so loudly she felt her voice grow sore. She kicked dirt towards him, screaming at her brother and crying. "Because you always think about future consequences? Last time I checked I didn't get arrested for joy riding. Last time I checked I didn't smoke pot. Last time I checked I didn't steal money from our grandpa who was fucking dying of cancer!" Oscar tried to think of a retort, but nothing came out. Selene continued with her onslaught: "Last time I checked I got into a prestigious university, and last time I checked _I wasn't a burden on our family's life_."

"Fuck you," was all Oscar said, stung. He wanted to cry, but refused vulnerability.

"Every single day I was held to good standards," Selene's voice lowered, though it cracked from soreness. Her face was still teary, though she was no longer crying. She was calm, even. "Because I was sensible, pretty, smart and athletic. Apparently, I'm perfect. So whenever I screw up I'm treated like I'm Satan for doing something wrong just once. You can do anything. You can probably murder someone and they'd just wipe the slate clean because that's how Oscar is. But with me? The standards are different and you know it," Selene turned away from her brother. "On the day you were arrested for joy riding, mum called me and told me about it and it really got to me, you know? I went to a frat party to forget my troubles, I drank more than I should have and I _fucked up_. And I know that, okay?"

Oscar stood in silence. The wind ruffled his hair slightly and drew a lone tear away from the straight path it intended to follow. He brushed it away with a finger, looking to the ground. He didn't know what to say. He always thought Selene had this perfect existence in an immaculate, rose tinted bubble. But she was right. Nobody did.

He understood her, now. But a part of him was still furious.

Suddenly, Sierra's screaming drew the siblings out of their train of thought. They turned towards the noise fearfully, knowing what the scream probably meant. When Ilene's and Melanie's screams followed in quick succession, Oscar knew that there was definitely trouble. He rummaged in his coat pocket for his gun.

"Fuck," he moved towards the noise and turned towards Selene. "They're in trouble. Just stay there, I'll pick you up later, okay?"

Selene nodded at him and leaned against a try, the familiar fearful expression eclipsing her face once again as Oscar stormed through the forest, praying that nobody else could hurt the people who surrounded him.

* * *

"Don't shoot!" Ilene screamed at Eleana, who immediately had her gun raised.

Jareck and Thomas rushed towards the river bank, screaming at what they had seen. Everything went in slow motion, though Ilene felt like she was moving at superspeed thanks to the adrenaline. Sierra fought and kicked, occasionally rising to the surface of the water. Ilene didn't even think twice - she forced herself into the river, feeling the cold sweep over her and weigh her clothes down. She rushed towards Sierra, fighting against the weak current. She grabbed against her daughter and tore her away from whatever had tried to attack her.

She saw it clearly through the water: a walker which had been trapped under the water by a large rock that had crushed its leg. It was bloated and disgusting. As Ilene tore her daughter away, she dragged the walker with her and watched with disgust as the walker's leg was torn from its body. As blood clouded around them the Walker lunged for Sierra, but Ilene reacted instantly and shoving her arm in front. She screamed in pain as the Walker's teeth sunk into her arm and blood was immediately spilled.

"Get to the edge of the bank, Sierra!" Ilene screamed, trying to shake the Walker's clenched jaw away.

Sierra didn't have to be told - she immediately moved towards the adults, where Alyssa and Jareck helped her clamber onto the river bank. Ilene kicked the Walker back into the river bank and reached for a large stone, bludgeoning the Walker's weakened skull in before it attempted to maul her again. It submerged under the river again and Ilene found herself surrounded by misty blood, some of it the blood that leaked from her arm.

Shit... Shit... _No_. Ilene looked at her wound in horror, but felt oddly calm. It wasn't a big wound - only a few punctured teeth marks in her arm - but she knew it was enough. She knew what happened to everyone else who was bitten.

"Ilene!" Alyssa cried out, shocked.

"Did it get Sierra?" Ilene turned around, still waist deep in river water. Sierra came first. "Check around her ankle," Ilene's voice was maddened and rushed. "I-It grabbed her around there."

Alyssa checked around Sierra's body. Sierra was shaking and crying, obviously not quite understanding what had happened. Everybody was congregated around her, looking down at her glumly. Once Alyssa checked around Sierra's skin, she stood her up and inspected around her more thoroughly.

"She's okay," Alyssa said, exhaling with relief. "Ilene, are you-"

"I'm fine," _or as fine as you could be when you were going to die_ , Ilene thought. She was relieved almost to the point of tears, Ilene made her way to the river bank and was lifted out with the help of the Filipino sisters, who said nothing but looked grimly at her and her wound. "We need to think of something. We need to make our way back to camp."

"Mommy," Sierra wailed. Ilene picked Sierra up and held the crying girl to her chest.

"It's okay, sweetie,"

"Fuck," Chelsea said, pointing across the bank.

Ilene already knew it was once she heard the familiar groans that had brought her all the way back to New York City, when the outbreak had gotten back. She turned around stupidly slowly and saw a horde of the things across the banks, sluggishly making their way towards the river in desperate need for food. Ilene's and Sierra's screams must have attracted them.

A few of the zombies slumped and rolled into the river upon being shot by Eleana. Eventually, the others turned and ran with the exception of Alyssa, who tugged on Ilene's bitten arm. Ilene stared in horror at one of the zombies - a girl who looked almost exactly like her, except the sinewy muscle around her jaw had been completely torn away. She didn't want to become one of those things. She stared at the dead reflection of herself for a few seconds before Alyssa's persitent tugging made her hold Sierra tighter than ever before and hurry back into the forest.

* * *

Oscar let out a sigh of relief when he rushed into the group who had visited the river - fortunately, nobody seemed to be dead. Chelsea, Jareck, Thomas, Sierra, Ilene, Alyssa, Melanie and Eleana seemed to be okay. He noticed a gash on Ilene's arms, but reserved the panic button for later. He briefly looked into each of their faces in turn, trying to exhale whilst a pain blossomed in his side.

"I'm glad you're all okay," he led them back towards camp. "I-I think your screams attracted some of the crawlers," he explained. "I bumped into a few. I'm fine, though, is everything okay?"

"Ilene was bitten," Alyssa announced tearfully, earning a glare from Ilene.

"Shit," Oscar quickened his pace slightly. Guess they'd have to cross that bridge when they got to it.

He paused, looking to the left where he had left Selene. Could he trust her to be safe? He cursed internally. He should've left his gun with her. But he hadn't heard any screams, and he knew if Selene was competent at anything - besides law - it was creating a ruckus. Ilene really needed medical attention back at camps, and the group he was leading had more people and children.

Despite being torn, Oscar knew what he had to do. He turned to the other and gestured them forwards, back towards camp. The realisation of being bitten had gotten to Ilene, who was suddenly crying. Trying to ignore the quiet, mournful sobs, Oscar pressed forwards.

He heard a word shouted in a foreign language. He turned around and was quick to realise that Melanie had fallen. Her sister was already crouched down, trying to help the crying girl to her feet.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Alyssa said to herself.

"I've twisted my ankle," Melanie sobbed.

"Just stand up!" Her sister snapped.

"I can't!"

Oscar was genre savvy enough to know what happened when someone hurt themselves as the most inconvenient times. He slipped out his gun, expecting the walkers. Eventually Alyssa and Eleana grabbed Melanie from under both armpits and tried to drag her along the forest floor slowly. Eventually, the Walkers made their appearance, a few metres behind the struggling girls.

Oscar immediately fired at some. Despite training from Mari, he was yet to be perfected. The drawback of the gun meant he'd only managed to hit a few in the head, the rest continued walking towards them hungrily. Deciding it was best to follow suite, Eleana put all of Melanie's weight on a struggling Alyssa and stood up. Together they managed to take out a few of the walkers, but not enough. They were closing in on them from all sides of the forest, probably attracted by the noise of gunfire. Oscar felt sweat cloud his palms.

Whatever happened, they were probably screwed. They couldn't escape with Melanie and if they continued firing at the walkers they would probably be outnumbered eventually. Oscar could see monsters of all shapes, sizes, colours, genders...

Fuck.

"Ilene, take Sierra and the kids and run," Oscar commanded, blowing the brains out of a particularly large walker and almost stumbling back from the force of the recoil. "Eleana, try and give your gun to Chelsea and try and get Melanie out of here."

Melanie was crying more wildly, shouting something in Filipino as Alyssa struggled to drag her away.

"Fuck that," Chelsea watched Ilene, Jareck and Thomas desperately rush towards camp. "I'm out of here. I'm not dying for someone I barely even know."

"Chels-" She was their last hope; Oscar knew that next to Eli, Maige, and Mari, Chelsea was the best shot in the camp, especially for her age. She was potentially even better. She rushed after Ilene, withdrawing a penknife from her pocket and ramming it into a small Walker's eyesocket before it had the opportunity to bite her. Ignoring Oscar's angry shouts, she kicked it away and began sprinting.

"Chelsea, no!"

Alyssa let go of Melanie, who slumped uselessly across the forest floor, still in tears and looking more petrified than ever. Oscar temporarily found himself unable to do anything as he watched Alyssa speed through the forest. A quick feeling came over him. One of dread, of knowing that he couldn't do anything more because no matter what he did Melanie was dead.

Oscar raised his gun and killed two more walkers, before glancing at Eleanor, who was still desperately shooting zombies.

"I'm sorry," Oscar said. He turned to the area where Selene was, aimed his gun at any zombies taking up the pathway, and gunned them down. Wondering if it would do anything to help the Filipino girl's chances of survival, he threw his gun at Eleana's feet before sprinting off. Both sisters screamed confusedly at him, but only Selene and his own survival was on his mind as he carried on running.

* * *

Melanie watched as Oscar disappear into the trees, hopelessly watching after him. As soon as he went, all of her hopes went. She was sure she was a goner anyway, but Eleana had no chance of killing all the Walkers _or_ dragging her away, never mind doing both simultaneously. The tears swelled in her eyes, popping out and streaming down her cheeks. Everytime she had trusted somebody they'd let her down. She thought this group was different... But they weren't. Even the people who were nicer to her, like Alyssa, had left her to die.

"Fuck you!" Eleana screamed into the air. Interestingly enough, it was in English, though Melanie doubted Oscar heard. She wanted to curse to everyone else for abandoning her, too.

She watched as Eleana shakily shot a few Walkers who advanced towards her. Eleana _was_ good, and most of her shots were headshots. But she took a while to concentrate on her aim, and even then she was capable of missing. Melanie noticed that the Walkers were getting closer and closer, and all it took for them to die was one single bite or scratch. Things got even more tense and time constricting when Eleana's gun lost her ammo and she stooped down to get the gun that Oscar had left laying in the dirt at her feet.

Melanie watched Eleana stand up and start firing again. She looked around, trying not to panic or cry so spirtedly. Eleana had saved Melanie's life before and was perfectly willing to do it again, and Melanie knew that she couldn't just stand around while her sister fought for her. Gripping onto the trunk of the nearest tree, Melanie desperately tried to stand but the pain immediately crippled her and she gave way, sprawled against the forest floor.

As she rolled over she screamed as Walkers had approached her from behind, but Eleana had turned around and sharply gotten rid of them. In her moment of distraction in trying to save her sister, Eleana turned around just as a Walker leapt at her. Melanie screamed so hard she felt her throat constrict, but it was too late. She watched the Walker take a giant chunk out of Eleana's nose. Eleana screamed in pain as blood rushed down her face, somehow managing to press her gun against the Walker's temple and euthanise it.

When it fell, Eleana was immediately overwhelmed by more Walkers. Melanie screamed and turned away, refusing to watch her sister get feasted on. But Eleana's screams were overwhelmingly loud and defeated. Melanie couldn't think. All she knew was that she was alone, her sister was dead and she was going to die. But she didn't want to die. As Eleana's screams formed a grisly background music and the Walkers became distracted by feasting on flesh Melanie tried to crawl forwards, knowing that she probably wasn't going to escape. But she couldn't let her sister's death just be in vain.

She felt numb inside. A part of her knew that death would spare her from the constant agony of loss. But Melanie still wanted to live.

Crawling forwards as quickly as her busted ankle could allow, Melanie kept screaming as she heard Walkers clamber behind her. She knew that she was even slower than them and when she looked around - in all directions - they were seizing in on her. There were so many. All the bullets in Eleana's gun wouldn't be enough to take them all down. How many people had died in the past month? There were dozens in the forest already...

Desperate to survive, Melanie continued screaming as she crawled forwards, kicking backwards and feeling the cold flesh of a Walker's ankle.

" _Someone help me_!" She shrieked.

Suddenly the flashing sound of bullets struck her ear, painfully loud. She heard the Walker behind her collapse, and the Walkers surrounding her had all plunged, as if cut from a support that kept them uprights. Blood rained around the forest, painted by a storm of bullets that forced Melanie to bury her head into the dirty forest floor in the hope that she wasn't caught in the crossfire.

She felt something grab onto her and tried to resist. But the hands weren't cold; they were warm. She was almost dragged, thrown over Mari's shoulders as the older woman held an M60 in one hand, struggling to twist it in the direction of the many live Walkers that surrounded them.

* * *

There were too many Walkers to kill, even with Mari's talents and ammo. She surveyed the forest very quickly, struggling to keep Melanie in one hand and her somewhat heavy gun in the other. She quickly twisted her gun to Walkers that clambered closeby, blasting them to the floor, which was covered in blood. A few metres away, there were a swarm of Walkers around a corpse.

"E-Eleana..." She heard Melanie's muffled sob.

When she saw Eleana's familiar, bloodied hand sticking out of the pile of undead, Mari immediately knew what had happened. She'd seen a lot of deaths - many unjustified, most brutal and bloody, but this was the first time she'd ever felt punched in the gut. Having worked closely with Eleana for more than a month, she'd grown to respect her. Eleana was hardworking, head strong but still humane. And she had a sister who would have to pick up the pieces of her death. Joe's death was brutal enough, but something about this had left it even worse.

When a bitten Ilene, Alyssa and kids had rushed into camp screaming about being attacked, Mari knew she had to look for the British kids and the Filipino sisters. Now Eleana was dead and neither of the British siblings were anywhere to be seen.

Shit.

Mari made sure to kill another round of Walkers before rushing towards camp. She was considerably slowed down by the weight she was holding, and Melanie's constant shaking and sobbing didn't make it any easier, but she could easily outrun Walkers. She soared through the forest, ducking under branches and leaping over logs, occasionally casting a glance behind her and finding herself unable to see any of the Walkers, despite hearing them in the distance, a lingering threat that was forever present.

Melanie had stopped crying, but she could still feel the younger girl's slight tremble. She didn't have time to comfort her. Not now. They may have looked safe, but that didn't mean that they were safe. Mari was exhausted, and her pace was somewhat slower, but she still ran out of the forest and into the clearing. Seeing Eli hurrying towards her from the distance, she dropped her M60 and adjusted Melanie though that she cradled her in her arms. She saw Melanie's defeated tear-stained face, which was ridiculously pale, and began sprinting close to the camp as quickly as she could.

Eli approached her.

"Eleana is dead," Mari told him quickly as he walked with her, holding onto his gun. "Wh-Where are the British kids?"

"The boy came back," Eli said quickly. Mari could see the whole camp congregated in the distance, with the exception of Maige and the Mott family. "His sister is missing."

Mari didn't reply to Eli, she just felt even more discouraged. As he halted, she rushed towards camp at an even quicker pace. As expected, nobody said anything. They just mournfully watched has take Melanie into one of the tents where she could deal with what she had just seen her own way. Initially, Mari headed towards the Filipino sisters' tent, but reversed and headed towards her own tent, which she shared with Jareck.

As soon as she entered the tent she lowered Melanie. She expected Melanie to sob, to scream, to do something. But Melanie wasn't even doing that. She just curled into a ball and trembled, completely defeated. Mari watched her for a few seconds, lost for words. After everything what could she say? What could she do? She only broke out of her spell when she heard someone enter the tent from behind her.

She turned to see Ellie, who was teary and terrified.

"Mari, w-what's happening? Everyone is too scared to say anything. Ilene is bitten and Selene is missing-"

"Eleana is dead," Mari announced, emptily.

Ellie didn't reply. She glanced to Melanie, looking shocked. Her expression became grave and the little colour she had in her face disappeared for a second. Mari felt for Ellie; she barely left camp, and didn't know how much danger she was shielded from. But now she probably had a pretty good impression.

"Is Jareck okay?" Mari asked nervously, eager to see him.

"He was with us, he's shocked, but he's fine."

"I need to see Ilene."

"She's with Maige, in the Motts' tent."

"Thank you, Ellie," Mari patted Ellie on the shoulder and paused. "Do you mind staying with Melanie and checking her for bites, scratches, whatever."

"Y-Yeah. Sure."

Mari left Ellie in the tent, unsurprised to see Adam hanging around outside it. She gave Adam a quick nod of approval and watched Adam bustle into the tent. The camp had a depressed aura which it had never possessed before. Joe's death had shocked the camp, but the recent events - the children being attacked, people going missing, being bit, dying... That had shook the foundations of the tent to the core. When Mari passed then, observing all of their faces, she knew why she was tentative to be leader. Because no matter her efforts, these things were going to happen. And what could she do?

Alyssa was crying into Han's shoulder. Jareck, Thomas, and Chelsea were all shaken and being reassured by Wendy, who sat next to a shocked Jermaine. Most depressingly of all was Oscar, who looked like he had nothing to live for. Sighing, Mari made her way into the Motts' tent, prepared for an even more depressing sight.

She wasn't wrong. In the large tent, which you could tell belonged to a once wealthy family, Jaime was crouched against the wall with a sleeping Sierra in his arms, looking broken. Maige was tending to Ilene across the tent. Still standing tall, Mari gestured to Maige to come close.

"This isn't good," Maige said to Mari sadly.

"She's been bit?"

"Yes, it's not much, but it's enough. I've cleaned it and bandaged it and I've even tried giving her anti biotics. I don't know if it's going to work, though."

Mari glanced at Ilene, whose eyes were closed. She was clearly awake, though.

"She's going to die."

"Don't say that!"

"I can't pretend she won't," Mari shook her head. She wanted to run away and forget everything. "Look, I need to talk to her, and I need you to take control," Maige nodded, determined. "I need you to try and get Eli, Wendy or Jerkwad to try and find the British girl. I don't rate her chances, either, but we can't just abandon one of our own. Also, the Motts are going to face a big loss today. I need you to... I don't know."

"I get it," Maige said, smiling. "I've had to face with loss myself," she shook her head.

She immediately moved towards Jaime, whispering something into his ear. Somehow, whatever she said worked, and he carried Sierra out of the tent. Mari's heart broke when she realised the girl was going to lose her mother - and she'd probably lost her innocence after being attacked at the river. But that was nothing compared to losing your life.

* * *

It had been two hours and Ilene hadn't gotten any better. Her joints felt as if they'd rapidly aged by two decades instead of two hours, she'd experienced the worst nausea you could possibly feel without actually vomiting and the persistent, painful beating in her head didn't aid her at all. As time went by, she felt herself become even more sick and even more weak. She knew what happened to people who got bit. They became one of them. She just didn't know that there'd be so much pain and suffering that preceded the undignified way of dying.

She'd hoped that her wound being cleaned and anti-biotics would be enough to prevent that transformation was happening, but she knew that if that was the case - if conventional medicine could help - civilisation would never have collapsed. She was going to become one of them. She wanted to get out of the camp, to stop herself from becoming a danger to her daughter and the people she'd befriended, but she felt too weak to stand.

She opened her eyes. Her vision was already blurry. Did the sickness that hit an infection really affect her that close? She could see around the tent, and she could see Mari's figure in the background, but it was only a vague configuration of what was.

"Ilene?" Mari had sounded more reproachful than usual. In fact, Ilene had never seen her act reproachful. "You awake?"

Ilene tried to talk, but her throat was sore. She nodded quickly.

"Look, I know you're not in a great condition to talk," Ilene saw her come forwards reproachfully. "I-I didn't want to be the person to tell you this," her warm hand grabbed Ilene's cold ones. "But I think when you get bit... you... you..." Mari sighed.

"You die."

Mari looked taken aback, shocked Ilene had the strength to talk. "More than that, you become one of them. We're trying to save you. I don't know, how are you feeling? Can I give you more water? Anti-biotics? _Anything_?"

Ilene shook her head.

"You're wasting your time, you need those more than I do. They're not going to do anything, Mari."

Mari paused. "I know, Ilene." Mari's warm, tough hands were replaced with something tough and metallic. "I-I know you want to take the dignified way out, when you feel the time is ready. It's supposed to be painless, j-just put it to the back of your head, I promise it won't hurt," the gun was heavy, Ilene was barely able to lift it. She knew she wanted to die like that instead of just wasting away into a killing machine. But she was so scared. She didn't know what death felt like. She didn't know there was an afterlife. She wanted to see her daughter grow up, to feel Andreia's arms around her. Things she'd never experience.

"I want to die as soon as possible," she said. "I just want to talk to my daughter one more time."

Mari stood up. "I'll tell Jaime. I-I'll go out, I promise. You deserve dignity."

Mari left too quickly for Ilene to protest about seeing Jaime. She didn't want to see him again, not having his face in her last memories would be something she'd benefit greatly from. She leaned up, but her arms were too weak. She immediately slumped back. Her memory was so blurry. She gave her life saving her daughter, which was something she'd never regret. Sierra was okay, right? And had anyone else back at the river died? She swore she heard Mari and Maige talking about death earlier.

"Mommy?"

She was the small figure standing in front of a much taller one. She smiled. She'd miss her beautiful little girl so, so much.

"I'm here baby," Ilene stretched her hand out. She felt the tears fall. "Can you please give mommy a hug?"

Her daughter rushed to her, immediately cradling herself in her mother's arms. Sierra seemed confused as Ilene wept more than she ever had in her life, but didn't question her mother. It motivated her to comfort Ilene, to hug her that little bit tighter and stroke through her mother's hair.

"Why are you so cold?"

"Mommy is sick," Ilene croaked. "I don't have much time."

"Much time before what?"

Ilene evaded the question. She looked her daughter in the face. "You saw the monsters. Always look out for them, okay?" Sierra nodded, scared at the mention of the monsters that had attacked her back in the river. She held her mother's hand tightly. "Just stay away from them. And i-if you learn to, shoot them in the head. But Mari and daddy will be there to protect you. Stick by them. A-Always do what they say. Be a good girl, okay?" She didn't even have the strength to wipe the tears that littered her face. Sierra had always been sweet and sensible.

"I will mommy. I'll be good for you," Sierra knew something was wrong and was crying.

"Take her away, Jaime," Ilene said to her husband, who stood by the exit. "A-And don't come back..."

"No! No!"

Sierra held onto her mother, crying and protesting, as if she knew she'd never see her mother again. But her father was much stronger. He tore her from Ilene, who turned away to hide her tears as she saw her daughter being taken from her for the last time. Sierra's wails and screams were still heard in the distance, even when she had been taken out of the camp.

Ilene didn't know if it was night or day outside. She didn't know anything. But the background sound of her daughter's haunting screams made her want to take herself out before she turned. Struggling to keep the weight of the gun, she raised it and nestled it against the back of her head like Mari had instructed. Her finger shook on the trigger before it was torn from her hand.

"Ilene, what the fuck?"

"I told you to not come back," anger dripped from Ilene's voice, even though she felt too weak to shout.

"You were going to kill yourself?"

"I'm going to die, Jaime," Ilene pleaded. "P-Please give me that gun."

Jaime paused. He seemed completely neutral, but his voice shook as he was on the verge of tears.

"I know that," he dropped the gun beside her, and she defensively clutched that. "I know what happens when people get bit. That's why I came here because I-I..." He turned around, running her hands through his hair and trying not to cry. "I don't want to lose you. I know we're done... But... I thought we had a chance and then this happens..." He covered his eyes with one palm. "I wanted to know if you ever loved me."

Ilene closed her eyes, the dregs of her tears slipping out of them.

"Jaime, I always loved you," she said, saddened but content.

He threw himself forwards, crying almost as passionately as Sierra had. The strength of his embrace hurt. But that wasn't why she had been reduced to tears a second time. If she'd have lived, she knew her and Jaime wouldn't have reconciled. Because even if she did love Jaime, their marriage had suffered too many blows and her heart was - and still was - with someone else. But she wished he didn't come back and make her feel as if things could have been different.

They couldn't, but in her dying moments the prospects of the future, and new renditions of the past, kept hitting her. Over and over again.

"I'm so sorry I fucked up," Jaime cupped her head in his hands, leaning in and kissing her as he blubbered. "I was too proud to apologise and it was all my fault. If I could do it again... if... if..."

"There is no if," Ilene paused. "But if you love me please look after our little girl, with everything she has. Make her protected, and most of all love her. If you find Andreia," she knew that wouldn't rest well with Jaime. "Or any of our family and f-friends, if this gets better, tell them how much I loved them. All of them."

"It's going to get better," Jaime said to her. "And I'll raise Sierra to know how beautiful her mother was. How she saved her life."

Ilene barely had the strength to smile.

"She really was the best thing we ever did. I ever did."

"You did make great stories, though," Jaime held onto her hand. "I'm going to miss you so damn much. A-And..." He was failing completely at trying to appear manly, crying profusely right in front of her. "I'll think of you every day, I'll think of our first dance, and of how much you loved that song-"

"I love you, Jaime."

Ilene didn't want to revisit memory lane. She meant it when she said she and Jaime were over. And, even in her final moments, she didn't want to go down that dangerous path. Using the last ounce of her strength she raised the gun quickly, pressed it to the back of her head, and pulled the trigger. She barely heard the loud noise that rang out of the gun. It was just instant darkness and peace.

* * *

 **:( The hard part is this story is going to get even worse. I loved Eleanor and Ilene so much, and both thought they'd make perfect survivors. I can see all of the characters surviving, really, which hurts because most of them aren't going to come out of this story alive and - bah - this is hard to write.**

 **Reviews are always appreciated. And the forum and my PM's are, too, if you need counselling.**


	10. Divided

**Crush or be Crushed fans - I'm so sorry, I've barely been inspired for the story, whereas I have for this one :/ dilemmas. I will refuse to update this story until I churn out a chapter of CobC though, I promise**

* * *

 _'The stars,' she whispers, 'blindly run;_

 _A web is wov'n across the sky;_

 _From out waste places comes a cry,_

 _And murmurs from the dying sun._

* * *

 _Day 45_

* * *

Selene opened her eyes slowly. Bar the mild cold, she felt kind of snug. Leaning up and groaning lightly, she almost fell out of the branch she had perched herself into the night prior. She didn't know if it was shock or morning sickness, but as she looked at the canopies that surrounded her and the dark forest floor beneath she suddenly realised that she'd spent her night in a tree.

Hardly a five star luxury resort, but at least she was alive.

After Oscar had fled, she had found herself near surrounded by Walkers. She had nothing to fight them with, and even if she did she wouldn't have known how to use it. She just ran. And when the coast seemed clear she had no idea where she was. The forest wasn't just creepy, it was large, and she had no idea how to navigate it unlike some of the others back in the camp did. When the dead could creep up on you while you slept, Selene decided to take no chances and she climbed up the nearest tree. Judging by the signs of the earlier cracks of dawn in the sky, she hadn't slept for long.

Carefully grabbing onto the thick branch, Selene flailed her legs until she got a foothold. She felt scared, but there was no Oscar, Wendy, Jermaine or Mari to support her this time. She purposely regulated her breathing, clambering around until she was safe (or somewhat safe) on the ground. After casting a glance around the proximity, where there was nothing but emptiness and trees, Selene concluded she was safe for now. She just needed to find a way back to camp.

Hopefully there would be food there. Selene didn't know if it was hunger or morning sickness, but she did _not_ feel good.

She didn't rate her chances. No food or no weapons meant that your days were numbered when civilisation collapsed and was replaced by the flesh eating undead. But she knew she could hang in there. She hadn't been in a good place emotionally, but she knew she could survive. She got into an Ivy League College, so she liked to think she was pretty smart. Keeping quiet, Selene wandered around until she found a big enough stick. Then she tried finding a sharp stone. She spent the next half hour trying to sharpen the stick until it could be used as some kind of weapon.

She twisted the stick around, looking at the jagged ending. It wasn't as good as a knife, but it would have to do.

Selene wandered around with no direction, pausing when she saw a small trail of dry blood trailed along the forest floor. She didn't know if she wanted to follow _that_ or not. Feeling terror grip hold of her, terrified that the blood belonged to someone from her camp or even her own brother, Selene slowly and hesitantly traced the trail. After ten minutes she found the source of it.

Not somebody from her camp, but it was still a disturbing sight.

It was a corpse. Thankfully not one that walked and ate. It was slumped against a tree, eyes and mouth wide with terror. Selene winced and tried not to vomit when she saw a big chunk of head missing, dry blood and brain plastered against tree bark. Trying not to gag from the smell, Selene noticed the backpack that was strapped to him. She leaned down, noticing the front zip was already opened. There was nothing in it.

Horror dawned on her briefly and Selene realised she was in a _lot_ more danger than she thought. The dead guy wasn't holding a gun, which meant he didn't kill himself. And if all his supplies had been taken...

Retching slightly as the smell of corpse overpowered her, Selene squeezed tears from her eyes.

But she saw there was another zip on the backpack. One that the person who killed this guy must have missed, some kind of oversight. Her hands shaking, Selene quickly opened it and almost cried more fervently with relief. There was some tinned food in there. And two bottles water. And even a flashlight. She carefully pulled the backpack away from its original owner, standing up and staring at it in horror as a cockroach crawled out of the corpse's mouth.

She did not want that to happen to her.

Managing to feel both more optimistic and more pessimistic than she had before, Selene turned away from the corpse and walked away from the trail of blood with an even quicker step. She was more alert, too. She knew that with Walkers she had to be on high alert, because they seemed to come out of nowhere. But they were dumb and they weren't against making a lot of noise. They didn't have guns which they could fire from a long range, either. But humans didn't have those drawbacks. And there would some people out there who would kill her for the tiniest morsel of food.

Selene took a few measured tips of water, exhaling with relief, before continuing down the forest. She almost stumbled over a root, but kept her balance. She wanted to run. Maybe it would help her find camp quicker. But she could also run into the arms of a Walker or a dangerous human. Selene wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to repress a sob. The panic she had held at bay was finally setting in.

She was so royally screwed unless she had a brilliant plan.

After trying to calm herself, Selene saw something that suddenly made her realise that she could not stay calm when she laid eyes on a gun. A gun that rested in a puddle of blood. She knew whose gun that was.

That was Oscar's gun.

She leapt forward, grabbing onto it and seeing that it was coated in blood. What the hell had happened? No. Not Oscar...

Sobbing, she held the gun close and ran deeper into the forest, trying not to scream.

* * *

The September rain fell like mist, adding to the gloomy aura that had pervaded the campsite since they had lost two prized members. Everybody was either hidden away in their tents, coping with last night's events in their own manner, or they were miserably huddled around the campfire. Maige glanced at them wistfully for a few seconds before marching across the campsite, getting her shoes coated in mud.

Heading towards Mari, who was rummaging through the trunk of the Motts' silver mercedes, Maige kept her expression resolute despite feeling shaken inside. She'd come to realise that her father's death wasn't some tragic anomaly that only affected her. The whole world had gone to shit, and every single person alive would feel the stabbing pain of loss... over and over again.

"What're you doing?" Maige said, pausing when she saw the abundance of supplies that was nested in the car trunk. Mari threw multiple bottles of water aside before she picked up a stack of cans.

"We're not going to cook anything today," Mari seemed unusually distant. It were as if the rain had extinguished the inner fire that made Mari so exceptional. "So I guess we'll just resort to canned shit today."

"Better than nothing," Maige smiled, not wanting to mention the events of yesterday. Just when the camp felt so harmonised, it had become a mess. With Elena and Ilene dead, and Selene missing, it was three members down. Not just did the camp have to deal with grief and loss, but everybody felt some form of practical loss - including Mari. Nobody, except the guards, had even considered doing their usual chores. Alyssa couldn't handle all of the children on her own. There was a sense of anarchy, and any direction the group felt it had was dead and buried.

After grabbing the pack of cans, Mari used her elbow to close the car trunk. Maige leaned against the car slightly before she saw something concerning on the other side of the road: Jaime was there, digging a grave himself. He was evidently a shadow of his former self; his clean shaven face was now covered in fuzzy facial hair, his hair had grown and was dripping wet as he desperately shovelled dirt aside.

"What's he doing?" Maige paused.

Mari looked over at Jaime, sighing.

"He must be digging a grave for Ilene."

"Where is Ilene?"

"No idea," she watched him for a few seconds, contemplating. "Maybe I really ought to stop him-"

"No," Maige gently grabbed Mari's arms, halting her. She sympathetically glanced at Jaime again. Everything about him radiated grief. "No, don't," she said gently. "I know what he's going through. I really do," she sighed. "And I think he needs his own time and his own space. He needs to mourn his own way," Mari and Maige both watched Jaime from afar, silent as the rain covered them. "Because nowadays, getting to bury the people you love is evidently a novelty now."

They both watched him sullenly, wondering if he'll ever be the same.

* * *

The rain turned into a drizzle, which made being outside much more bearable albeit the atmosphere had somehow become even more gloomy. Wendy was starving as she made her way to breakfast, noting the miserable crowd that sat on the wet logs. Adam and Ellie were cuddled into each other slightly, miserably eating cold, bland looking beans directly out of a can. Opposite them, Alyssa was bawling into Han's chest, although he looked pleasantly neutral as per usual. There was no-one else to be seen.

She was kind of glad. She wanted to avoid the brunt of the mourning. She wasn't close to Elena or Ilene, but she felt the blow of their deaths by just looking at everyone else's faces. She didn't know if she could bare to see Jaime or Melanie right now.

... It was already kind of awkward that Selene was vacant, not in the spot she usually slept in.

For Oscar's sake, she hoped she was okay.

"-With Ilene gone and Selene missing," she heard Alyssa venting to her friends. "I-I have no-one left. I don't know what to do."

"I understand," Ellie mumbled, evidently not being able to conjure consoling words. What was there to say?

Wendy made no comment, but sat on the spot next to Alyssa. Alyssa stopped talking and gave Wendy a very peculiar look, before standing and sitting on the opposite side of Han, evidently trying to avoid Wendy. Frustration flared up inside her. What the hell did she do?

"What's up?" Wendy asked, forcing a cool tone.

Alyssa looked at Ellie and Adam awkwardly, both of them strangely avoiding her eye contact. Wendy could smell that something was up a mile away - naturally, the fact that Alyssa refused to be in her proximity was telling enough, but there was something that wasn't being said.

"Look, Wendy," Alyssa's hands were moving around, as if they were trying to find something to do. "I don't have anything against you, I don't," Wendy knew there'd be a but before Alyssa even said it. "But... Well, everyone in the camp isn't really your number one fan right now," Wendy opened her mouth to talk, but was interrupted. "I know it's not fair but nobody really likes Jermaine, and you're kind of... um... associated with him."

"I thought I left high school seven years ago," Wendy barbed.

Alyssa looked at her hands, ashamed. Han put his arm around her shoulders, silently looking at Wendy without commenting.

"I'm sorry, Wendy."

"Yeah," Wendy stood up. She didn't want to show it, but she was pretty upset. She hoped that the droplets of water that ran down her face would mask the tears she was trying not to cry. "Fuck you, too."

She grabbed one of the tins which was supposedly supposed to make up for breakfast and stormed away. She was on duty soon, anyway. Wendy knew she wanted to kick something or someone. She knew she wanted to cry. But what could she do? She stuck up for Jermaine once to make sure Mari didn't bloody her hands. She didn't know that would earn her the contempt of the people she thought she respected.

As she stormed across the grass, she bumped into Jermaine, who smiled upon seeing her.

"You wouldn't believe what Eli just found," he smiled welcomingly.

"Fuck you, Jermaine," Wendy snarled, glaring up at him. He looked taken aback.

"What did I do wrong?" He looked dejected. Kind of like a puppy.

"Exist," she snapped, barging into him as she stormed away.

* * *

Han watched after Alyssa, concerned. Adam and Ellie had withdrawn into their tent, obviously not wanting to soak up the depressive air that seemed to become more and more oppressive. Now Alyssa barely talked, but at least she wasn't crying constantly. But her silence was both rare and concerning - having lost Selene and Ilene, feel guilt for Eleanor's death _and_ have a disagreement with Wendy, Han knew that Alyssa must have felt pretty isolated.

Sometimes she would turn on the waterworks again, at which point Han would awkwardly hug her close. He did feel her sadness, he did get why everyone was so upset, but he wasn't quite as affected. He only knew the group for a month, and he didn't really interact with any of them much bar Alyssa. Naturally, he felt for them. He really did. But he still felt a large discord between himself and everyone else. There was no deep emotional investment.

"This is just getting worse and worse," Alyssa sniffled.

"It'll get better," Han paused. But would it? Not while they sat around. But surely the outskirts of Buffalo were much safer than actually being _in_ Buffalo. He wondered if the army had some kind of quarantine zone. That's what he'd expect. There'd be safety and shelter there, as well as medical facilities. Maybe if they had gotten to some kind of facility it would get better.

But until then... Would it get better? Would it be the same thing? Would the numbers in their group dwindle one by one until either Han died or he'd lose Alyssa and truly feel the sting of loss?

Alyssa didn't talk. She was just reduced to tears again. Conveniently, Oscar had made his way to the camp at that point. It was a surprise to see him - Han hadn't seen many people even come out of their tents. To see Oscar, who had a missing sister, was a mild surprise. Though, as expected, Oscar didn't exactly look mentally healthy. His fair skin had faded into a more extreme paleness, and he looked dishevelled and emotionally drained, even if he didn't show as many tears as Alyssa.

"Breakfast," Han smiled, jerking his head towards the pile of tins of the floor. Oscar glanced at them emptily. "If you want it."

"Thanks," Oscar picked one up, using the knife beside the pile to pierce the tin and open it.

Alyssa had stopped crying again. She didn't seem to acknowledge Oscar's presence. She just stared towards the forest emptily. Han hoped she would provide something comforting for Oscar to eat up, but how could somebody who required comforting provide it? He watched Oscar sloppily eat the unappealing looking meal awkwardly, wondering what he could say.

"Hey, Oscar?" Oscar glanced at Han. "How are you holding up?"

He shrugged, almost looking indifferent. But despite Han's lack of emotional intelligence, he knew that Oscar was definitely not indifferent. Selene must have been constantly on his mind.

"No news is good news," Oscar paused. "Eli is looking for her... So, yeah."

"Well, if you need to talk..."

"I don't."

Han smiled awkwardly. "Yeah, that's cool."

There was silence for the millionth time. Han realised how uncomfortable he must have made many people feel in the past, because he realised that the silence; the fact everyone was extremely reluctant to talk, silenced by sadness, had made him feel extremely uncomfortable. He held Alyssa somewhat tighter, hoping it would stop him from feeling awkward as she once again began to cry lightly.

Han noticed that Oscar hadn't seemed to finish eating, but upon glancing over his shoulder he stood and walked back towards his camp. He watched after Oscar, greatly confused for about three seconds before he realised Melanie was now sitting opposite him.

If Oscar looked bad, Melanie looked worse. She looked like she'd had her soul torn out, eaten and regurgitated back into her. A Prometheus incarnate.

However, her presence seemed to pick Alyssa up slightly.

"Melanie," Alyssa was taken aback, then relieved. "I-I thought we wouldn't see you for weeks," Melanie glanced at her blankly, devoid of the shy demeanour she usually had. Alyssa stumbled forward, trying to find the words to express herself. "I-I mean, when Maige lost Joe... I mean, how are you hanging in there?"

"You really think being nice fixes everything, don't you?" Melanie said, emptily. She picked up one of the tins, piercing it.

"Well..." Alyssa pulled away from Han slightly. "If you want to talk-"

"Yeah, I want to talk," Melanie looked at the contents of her tin numbly. "I want to talk about how I don't feel like I can trust this group anymore. None of you except Mari, anyway. I went out with all of you. And I was left to die," she paused. "First Chelsea. Then you, who I trusted. Then Oscar, who Elena trusted. We _both_ trusted you, Alyssa. And now I'm beginning to wonder why. Why am I here if nobody here is prepared to help me?"

Han glanced awkwardly at Alyssa, who looked deflated and desperate.

"Mel, it wasn't like that-"

"Don't call me Mel, we don't know each other," despite the calmness of her tone, there was still fury in her voice.

"Melanie, I have to explain myself..."

"Explain yourself? You abandoned _my_ sister, left her to die, to save your own skin." Melanie tipped the tin of beans over indifferently, watching the beans spill out and leak across the floor with a lack of interest.

Alyssa looked borderline horrified. Concerned, even.

"I did it to save Chelsea... She ran away, I wasn't doing it for myself," Han knew this to be the truth - Alyssa had cried to him about it repeatedly, and had also repeatedly expressed guilt over Eleanor's death. To have Eleanor's own sister pointing the finger must have buried the guilt into an even darker place. But Han also understood Melanie's skepticism, although judging by Melanie's enraged expression _skepticism_ was putting it lightly.

"That kid wouldn't stick around to save you. Elena would. So who is worth saving?"

Alyssa stood up, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I'm sorry, okay? I can't offer anything but an apology... I'm... I'm so, so sorry."

Melanie threw the can to the floor. It rolled into the flames, and bathed in them, slowly attaining an orange hue. At first it seemed as if Melanie had nothing to say. Her usually shy, doe like features were twisted and cold, a void where emptiness inhabited.

"An apology isn't going to bring my sister back," Melanie concluded, turning around.

Alyssa snapped. Han knew she'd taken a lot of weight, had bottled a lot of feeling up. It was only normal that she'd eventually crumble, or stand up for herself when needed. He just didn't expect it to be so devastating.

"You know what would've brought her back? If you weren't a clutz."

"What?" Melanie paused, still facing away from them.

"Or maybe if you fucking tried harder," Han squeezed Alyssa's hand, his silent warning sign. She didn't take it. After shaking her hand away from him angrily, tears of rage littered across her face, she stood up to confront the mourning sister. "It's a little convenient that you can walk now? When you twisted your ankle it couldn't have been too bad," Han considered walking away from the confrontation. It was reaching an explosive territory the group had only witnessed once, when one member of the group pointed a gun at the other's forehead. He didn't want to be around for that. "If you weren't such a fucking baby Elena would still be alive and you know it!"

Melanie turned around, shaking with rage.

"You better take that back," she snarled.

"Why? I've offered you and _everyone else_ nothing but support and you shit on me for it," Alyssa wiped her eyes slightly. "I've had enough of it."

"Oh, you think you're so unfortunate because people are calling you bad words?" Melanie laughed, stepping over the fire, slightly closer to Alyssa. "Please. You didn't lose a sister. You're lucky my knowledge of English swearing is not good, because there are some words in my native language I could use to describe you and they're not very good."

Alyssa also grew more enraged. Han didn't know if it was wise to guide her away or not. He was much bigger and stronger than Alyssa, but he was positive that his will for fighting was a lot smaller right now, and sometimes that was all that mattered.

"I would've never thought you were one self-absorbed little bitch Melanie. You don't know what I've lost."

"You're about to lose your teeth," Melanie said very calmly.

Despite the calm tone, Han immediately saw it coming. He tried to grab Alyssa and drag her away, but he should've done that five minutes ago; he was much too late. Melanie swung an impressive right hook that struck Alyssa perfectly in the cheek. Both girls shrieked, one in rage, one in pain. Before he knew it Alyssa was sprawled across his lap and Melanie had grabbed a fistful of Alyssa's hair.

Somebody stronger suddenly seized a snarling Melanie off a screaming Alyssa. Han barely had time to see Mari drag Melanie away, who still put up an admirable struggle as she shrieked in her native tongue. Glancing down awkwardly, he glanced at Alyssa, who was sobbing profusely as blood leaked out of her mouth.

"Maybe we should go into one of the tents," Han suggested uncertainly.

* * *

Melanie struggled savagely in Mari's grip, not able to break free from the much taller, stronger woman. Mari shoved Melanie into her small tent, but Melanie wouldn't give up her fight; she desperately wanted to hurt Alyssa for ever pointing the finger at her for her sister's death. Melanie _knew_ who was responsible for her sister's death. Oscar... Alyssa... Ilene... Chelsea... Anybody _but_ herself.

As Melanie hit the floor, sobbing, she realised why there was so much rage.

Because she blamed herself. A part of her knew she tried to get away after she'd tripped and hurt her ankle, she tried to hard to get away to save her sister... but was it enough? Could she have done more? Maybe she could've done _something._ Had she avoided tripping, there was a big chance that everybody except Ilene would have survived. Or she could've decided to not attend, to have spent just one hour without being attached to her sister's hip. She could've done something... anything. And Alyssa had made her snap by prodding into her deepest fears.

Mari turned, as if she were going to walk away, but she watched Melanie bawling and her heart hurt. There had been so much loss. And she felt like she couldn't do anything, but she knew she couldn't do _nothing_. She was always trying to pretend everything was okay.

Maybe, sometimes, the solution to making things better was acknowledging that they could be better.

She got to her knees. Melanie wanted to kick and scream at her - to kick and scream at the whole world - but she resisted when Mari stroked through her hair lightly, sympathetically. She didn't want to admit it, but it was nice. It was calming. It was like something Elena would've done.

"You know how in the movies I'm supposed to tell you how I feel, because I've felt it before," Mari's voice was hoarse, but in a strangely warm way. Melanie stared blankly at the tent walls, the tears still pouring from her eyes despite her newfound silence. "But truth is, I don't. The only thing I do know is that it must suck getting all the sympathetic looks... Having people pretend that they get a fraction of your pain. They don't know anything. And they're suffocating you, telling you what to do or how to feel. But all you need is air. I get that."

Melanie just nodded.

"I'm so lonely," she stated.

"If you need to talk..." Mari paused. "I respected Elena. She had my back, she followed orders but she wasn't afraid to tell me when I was crossing the line. She was a strong woman who took no bullshit, and she respected me. She was a big part of the group... I don't know how to replace her..." Somehow, that made Melanie cry even more fiercely. "I owe it to her to protect you. So if you need anything..."

"I'm tired of being protected," Melanie lamented. "When will I be able to do anything except be useless and cry?"

"You know that's not true-"

"Is it not?" Melanie turned to Mari, as if she were offended. "My sister and I had never had an easy life. But I had it easier. Because Elena was always by my side. As a kid I was quiet... a-and scared... and w-weak..." She looked at her bloodied hands and realised that some things never changed. "Our dad wasn't a good person. He beat our mother. Often. It's not uncommon in poor neighbourhoods like the ones we grew up in, but it happened and every single day I was scared for our mother."

"That's why Jermaine scares you," Mari didn't mean to talk out loud, but it clicked.

"I wish you shot him..."

Mari didn't say anything. She didn't know if shooting him was the right choice.

"My mother couldn't split apart from my father, she was too scared about how he'd react and without him we didn't have enough money," she explained. "S-So Elena and I lived in our Uncle's, just for a little while. There I discovered that I was smarter than most kids. I wasn't strong willed like Elena, but I could get good grades. It was the light at the end of the tunnel, to work tirelessly to get a job for the both of us. I wanted to go to medical school and be a doctor." She paused. "Even when we had to move back home I worked hard, but something... something went wrong... I heard fighting and gunfire. I knew my dad often threatened my mother with a gun, but I never expected him to use it!" She burst into tears.

"Shit," Mari said. "I... I'm so sorry," suddenly she realised Melanie had no family. Most other people in the camp probably had relatives out there, somewhere. But Melanie was condemned to a life of loneliness.

"My father had a gunshot wound to the head, too," Melanie paused. She seemed calm. "Elena was the one who called the police after a couple of hours and tried to calm me down, even though that was impossible. She told me he shot himself, but the way she told me what to say to the police and took forever to call them... I-I knew she did it herself. I never told her that I knew... But I did." She wiped her hands across her eyes, leaving a smudge of blood. "But I knew she lied to me to protect me. She was always there to protect me. She even moved abroad to the U.S.A to make money for me to come over here and have opportunity... everything she did was for me," she burst into tears. "I wanted to come here to tell her how much I appreciated it. She put everything on the line for me to excel... and it's all gone..."

Mari suddenly realised how shaken Melanie's world was - and it was already resting on weak foundations. She held Melanie close as the Filipino girl cried harder than ever before, as if she were being exorcised. She knew that she had to work hard for the group. Because they were all human... with human lives and histories and futures... She had a responsibility to make sure as many of them as possible got to a military camp or _somewhere_ safely.

And she didn't know if Melanie was a lost cause. Who was Melanie without her sister to protect her at every turn? Mari didn't know. But this was a girl who had managed to get amazing grades and get into a medical school despite coming from an impoverished family in an impoverished country, despite having an abusive family, despite _losing_ her whole family. Maybe there was a chance for her still.

* * *

It was the first time the kids had been given their own agency. With Ilene dead, Selene missing, and Alyssa in no state to look after anybody, Mari had given them their own tent and have given them specific instructions to not leave it unless it was to go to the bathroom. However, this new sense of independence had not been enjoyed. Jareck wanted to play, but Thomas was being his usual self and Chelsea seemed to be interested in nothing except her hands, which were spread across her knees as she sat down.

"Come on, come on," Jareck tugged at Thomas' shoulder. "Why don't we play?"

Thomas paused. "I don't think it's a good time to play. Last time we played, people died." He shook his head. "Why is everyone dying?"

Sierra suddenly entered the tent. She was holding a somewhat dirty looking juice carton, and was sucking from the straw despite the fact that there seemed to be no contents. She was much more cheery than her older peers.

"Hey," she smiled. Sierra had never interacted with the older kids much, and felt intimidated by them. They were all much bigger, stronger and played games differently. But they were nice to her. Especially Jareck.

"Hey, Sierra," Jareck looked uncomfortable. He scratched the back of his head. "I'm sorry, by the way, about your mom..."

"My mom is fine," Sierra squeaked.

"Fine?" Thomas questioned.

Sierra seemed to catch onto the fact that something was up. "Yeah, she just went away back home to get my toys, my daddy told me," she looked at each of the kids. Jareck looked confused, Chelsea solemn and Thomas had tears in his eyes that glimmered like morose stars. "What's wrong?"

"Well..." Thomas paused. "What happened to my parents happened to your mom..."

Sierra hugged the juice box closer to her chest, as if were some safety blanket.

"What do you mean?"

"He doesn't mean anything, Sierra," Chelsea snapped, glaring at Thomas angrily. "Why don't you give her a break? We all know what it's like to lose parents at this point," Jareck paused. He didn't know. Or at least he didn't think he did. "Let her have some breathing space, or at least prepare for what's to come," she knew from Sierra's innocent yet suspicious demeanour that they were treading on thin ice. For whatever reason, Jaime hadn't told her the whole truth, and they had to respect that. She still kept a harsh, restrictive glare on Thomas but said nothing else.

Sierra hung around for a second, as if she were hoping somebody would tell her what was happening. She left the tent, probably to find her grieving father. Thomas returned to his simpering self and Jareck watched as Chelsea slumped again, shutting herself away from the world.

Jareck liked to see the best in every situation or everyone. He'd always known deep down something was wrong, but now he knew that this whole thing wasn't some adventurous, mildly dangerous camping trip. They were essentially refugees who had fled from an uninhabitable New York City, but they were still in danger. And people around them were dying every single day.

Thomas had spontaneously burst into tears again. It all clicked to Jareck why Thomas had been sad about his parents. Whatever had happened to Joseph... To Ilene... To Melanie... That had happened to his parents. A part of Jareck had always acknowledged that, but now he was glaring reality right in the eye and fearing for the future. What the hell was going to happen?

"Chelsea," he turned to the fountain of knowledge amongst the children, scared. "What the hell are we going to do?"

"Stay in the tent like Mari told us to do."

"No," Jareck paused, his voice expressing defeat. The ray of sunshine he carried had suddenly been extinguished, replaced by seriousness. Even Chelsea had picked up on it. "I know we'd do that. But that's today. What about tomorrow, and the day after, and the week after, and the months and the years?" Chelsea suddenly avoided Jareck's gaze. "We've been stuck out here forever now. And it hasn't gotten better. In fact, it's gotten worse. What _are_ those monsters out there? A-And what do we do? Where are the policemen to help us, or the doctors?"

"Everybody is gone," Chelsea said with gritted teeth. "And now it's only us left. Us and an army of strangers."

Thomas glanced at the two as they conversed.

"But what do we do?"

"I don't know, okay?" Chelsea snapped, putting a dark hand over her eyes so that the others couldn't see the tears. "I don't know anything. All I know is that my parents are probably dead out there. Most people are probably dead now. The world has gone to shit. And I don't know what to do about it." Jareck had never seen Chelsea so vulnerable. He crouched down to console her, though she swatted his hand away. "I know I like to act like a grown-up sometimes. It makes me feel confident and cool that way. But because there are no more adults people are suddenly expecting me to be an adult. But I'm just a kid. And I get scared and sometimes I _fuck up_."

He didn't know what she meant, but he put his arm around her shoulders. She seemed to just accept it.

"And now everybody hates me," Chelsea complained. "I can't save the day all the time."

"I'll never hate you," Jareck held her close. "Pinky promise."

* * *

The night had held the same stillness and defeat as the day. But as the stars had filled the sky the group were met with a sense of urgency; they may have lost members of their camp, but they had to move on as if nothing had happened. People had to toughen up unless they wanted to join the people they had lost. This anxiety had hit everyone as they sat around the campfire for dinner and went to bed.

But some people weren't moving on. Han observed them all over the mild light of the fire. Melanie may have shown how furious she could be, but underneath all the pent up rage she was now lost and without a family. Jaime was a wreck of the man he once was, soaked by the rain, his hair long as scraggly facial hair had shown how little self respect he now had for himself. The kids were silent, sitting around with the adults and not showing the child-like demeanour that brought life into the group. Oscar, somehow, had been the one who had concerned Han the most. Selene was gone, but Oscar didn't have the clarity of knowing if she was gone for good. His light eyes, darkened by fear, were always facing the forest, as if he were expecting Selene to traipse out of the forest like nothing had happened.

But Alyssa was the most affected. She hadn't lost any member of her family, but seeing all the death and destruction right in front of her eyes had meant she was only crying. She wasn't just crying for the past, for the regrets she held, but like Han she was worried for the future more than Han could comprehend. She hung around the campfire longer than the other had, and after Han had managed to usher her into his tent she only stared into a void.

After waking up, Han turned around and noticed the tent was empty. He usually shared it with Eli and Alyssa, though neither were in their sleeping bags. It was normal for Eli to be gone in the night - he was on duty, or he usually wandered around if he found he couldn't sleep. But Alyssa was always by his side. She seldom left the tent unless Han had left the tent first. He got out of his sleeping bag clumsily, rubbing his tired eyes as he looked around.

... Something wasn't right.

Han poked his head out of the tent. It wasn't morning, and the sky was still dark as night. But, unusually, the campfire was still lit. It was usually extinguished this time to keep Walkers away. The even more concerning thing were the two figures by the campfire.

Somewhat nervous, Han made his way to the campfire until he saw the two figures illuminated. Wendy and Eli looked comfy, slouched asleep, Wendy atop Eli slightly. He was certain he'd never seen Eli sleep before... ever.

"Eli," he slapped Eli's cheeks lightly, but Eli didn't stir. Concerned, he also shook Wendy. He tried to wake both of them up but it were almost like they were kept asleep. Han knew that there was something wrong. At least they both had a pulse. "Wendy, wake up."

After leaning up he saw another figure in the distance, close to the forest, facing the camp. He'd known the figure so well he'd know who it was if he saw her a million miles away. What the hell was Alyssa doing just standing there?

Something was seriously wrong. Maybe it was the cold of the night, but Han felt an ice inside him like he'd never felt before.

Han knew he couldn't just wait around for Alyssa. Protective instinct took over him and he almost ran towards her. Seeing him coming, Alyssa seemed to turn away and wander further and further away from the camp. Having adjusted to the darkness, Han had seen that Alyssa was weighed down by multiple backpacks. He hurried forwards to her, eventually intercepting her. He grabbed her freezing wrists.

"Alyssa," he paused. "Alyssa what the hell is up?"

He was scared by what he would see when she turned around slowly. She seemed paler. There was something different about her features; they were sinister and darker. He knew she had been crying.

"Why did you follow me?" She said, offended. She pushed him away slightly and made her way towards the forest. Not giving up on her, Han followed. Soon they had entered the outskirts of the forest. Alyssa seemed desperate to avoid Han, but he was slightly faster than she was.

"Alyssa, what's up?" Han paused.

"Go away!"

"Why do you have the supplies?" Han paused. And then he registered something.

Betrayal.

Alyssa turned around confrontationally.

"Just go away, Han!" She warned him. He knew she was trying to keep on a cold front, a villainous one even, but she looked more vulnerable than ever. It was obvious she had been crying. In fact, she looked like a wreck in general: vulnerable, tired, hungry and in no state of mind to make any decision. Han realised he had to talk her out of any rash decisions.

"Alyssa, look, I know what you're doing-"

She stepped away, almost as if she were scared of him. She was clinging onto something in her hand, though Han couldn't see it.

"I've had it with this group, Han," Alyssa was speaking rapidly. "I tried to make it work but it didn't work. I tried to make friends but they all die or turn against me or... or..." Every step he took, she backed away slightly. "Just stay away from me!" She snarled, though it didn't deter Han. "I have always been on my own since the day I was born and it took me _this_ long to realise that's the way I ought to live. I can't live with anyone because it hurts... Just go away Han," she cried. Han eventually reached her and held her close. She clung onto him and sobbed.

"I saw Eli and Wendy making soup, I spiked it with some medication I knew Eli had been taking and I just want to get out of here..." He felt the wetness of her face against his neck. "I can't do this anymore."

"At least let me come with you," Han couldn't believe he was proposing it. "W-We can go together... Just don't go out into the dark alone..."

"I have always been alone," she pulled away, looking into his eyes. She seemed calmer, as if she knew what she had to do. "T-That's the way it has to be. You can't come with me or you'll get hurt."

"Alyssa-"

"I'm not letting you come with me!" She insisted. "I-I don't want to lose you..."

"I'm not going without you," Han held onto both of her hands. He felt something sharp and tried to prise it out of Alyssa's hands. She still stayed in place, suddenly. For the first time since the outbreak, Han felt hurt. He knew there was something at stake. He'd obviously been worried for his family, but they were all the way in California; for all he knew, they were safe for now. But Alyssa was right there in front of him and he couldn't let her go. He'd never cared for somebody so much before. "We can go back to camp and fix things and forgot this happened..." He sucked in a breath. "Or we can go. The both of us. But we're not going to be apart."

She shook her head, suddenly devastated.

"I'm so sorry Han," she pulled away. "I-I didn't mean for it to end like this."

He looked at her confusedly. "Alyssa..."

"I'm not going to lose you," she shook her head, turning to walk away and struggling under the weight of the luggage she was holding.

Han moved after her, grabbing her hand.

"Alyssa n-"

Alyssa turned around and suddenly there was a stabbing pain. Han didn't even have time to react, he only caught a reflection of his shocked face in Alyssa's teary eyes. When he looked down, all of his worst fears had been confirmed. It turned out Alyssa was holding a small knife which had been completely rooted into his belly. There was blood leaking from it, all around Alyssa's hands. Han instinctively cupped his hand around Alyssa's and felt the wetness of his own blood.

"N-No..." He struggled to talk. It had felt like the pain spread from his stomach to every cell in his body, even his throat.

"I-It didn't have to end like this," Alyssa insisted, more to herself than Han, who was already barely conscious. She pulled the knife from Han's gut, which made him gasp in pain - it was a worse pain than when the knife entered. As the world began spinning Han held onto the nearest tree, keeping himself upright but keeping his eyes on Alyssa, the ghost of adoration and worry still there. Alyssa was crying harder. "I told you it didn't have to end like this but you _didn't listen_. Why didn't you listen?" She yanked the knife back into Han again, who barely made a noise. He opened his mouth, but only blood came from his lips.

He invested all his energy into just talking. "Alyssa," he begged. "P-Please..."

She tore the knife away and turned around as Han collapsed. He knew she wasn't in control. He felt no resentment. He just wanted to live, he wanted Alyssa to get some help. He looked at the distance as Alyssa kept walking, weaving between the trees. As he bled, he desperately tried crawling after her. His breaths were shallow and every part of him slowly began to fade into obscurity.

Alyssa didn't look back at the weak, wheezing Han as he slowly bled out.

* * *

 **Yeah... As you can see, this story is not going to get any easier at all. In fact, I think this is the bit where it gets difficult :-(**

 **Thank you all for the lovely reviews! It may be a while for this story to get an update, because I really need to work on my HG story, but anyone who has followed me knows that I never abandon projects. I'm too stubborn for that.**

 _ **~Toxic**_


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